To wonder if junior football is nepo baby land?

[Goldenboot]

Son age 11 is reasonably good at football. Always been in top team at v competitive school. Not pretending he’s premier league but people have suggested he goes down academy route at times. As a family we have had too much going on to really pursue it. For many years he played in an informal team which is not part of a league.

We are foreign, didn’t grow up here so have probably not done the research required or got the inside knowledge about the politics of junior football!

It seems to be nearly impossible to navigate the trial dates etc and different teams locally.

He outgrew the non-league team a while ago but we only just found a club for him to join a few miles away quite recently.

From the moment he joined, there was a bit of a lingering vibe of resentment that an ‘outsider’ had got in while others who had been in team didn’t make it this year to match squad.

There have been a couple of snide comments from the assistant coach that DS is at independent school. We laughed it off and have done nothing but thank this coach and others for their help and time. DH has driven half an hour out of his way many times to give lifts to other boys etc when others didn’t step up who lived closer so it is not like we are not trying to help. Signed up to help at stalls on open days etc.

Several weeks ago, it transpired that this coach had lost the registration card for DS so we had to provide all the info again. He was not allowed to play for several matches.

It happens. I have ADHD so I can relate to losing things!

But now I’m wondering if there is a bit of an attempt to block DS? All three coaches have got their sons in the match squad. One of the coach’s son is good, the others are really below par. Their sons seem to get more games than others. By the way, this team has won nearly all their games this season when DS is playing but are in the bottom division which most of the parents didn’t even realise.

It is clear to nearly all the other parents that DS is one of the top 3 players but he has got man of the match once, other quite terrible players have had it several times.

I would like to think it’s because they’re trying to be inclusive but the poor judgement calls and lack of strategic direction says otherwise.

We paste on smiles and encourage the others and play it down with our son. He is always humble as I have drilled into DC that no one likes a boaster and that he is privileged and must never rest on his laurels. He can always do better.

DH was very sporty (Was on course to being pro in another sport before injury blew him off course). Basically, he is very tough on DS but he is dismayed at the treatment of DS and one or two other good players.

I am trying to encourage DH to become a coach as he could do better for the whole team not just DS but suspect he will not be welcomed!

Is junior football always so political? What are we doing wrong? I haven’t let any of these thoughts be known to other parents so am venting here as I know how bad it can sound said out loud.

We will trial him for other clubs but is there any point if all junior football teams are full of coaches and their nepo babies getting favorable treatment or inverted snobbery towards indy school kids?

Has anyone got good experience of junior football at this age (tweens/early teens)?

Should we push for an academy or hope he is discovered somewhere by scouts or is he too old?

I am very worried that he’s showing a real aptitude for rugby (top player in his year at school that favours rugby) and both of us are not keen due to DH disastrous injuries from this at top level.

Football feels far safer.

Per previous, avoid rugby like the plague.

While rugby is getting more dangerous (as the plethora of lawsuits taken out by players who are only in their 30s/40s will testify), football is the complete opposite with it being safer than previous.

Heading is now minimal (if not nonexistent) at youth level (no spending 30 minutes doing heading practice, nor having a ball tied to a rope and jumping up to head it repeatedly as Geoff Hurst did). The game is overwhelming played on the ground now.
Any minimal heading there is, the balls are much lighter and aerodynamic (also no water soaked heavy balls that were akin to heading a brick).
Players are now also far more protected by referees from tackles than previous.

Messi has gone through almost two decades without a serious injury. That could have never have happened in the generations before him (Maradona was hacked repeatedly as you got away with a lot without being penalised).

My DSS just turned 7 and the favouritism is honestly a bit sickening even at his age. Coaches son getting off with murder constantly, very little in the way of sportsmanship (literally just shoots at goal whenever he has the ball). DSS hasn’t noticed quite yet but I think he will soon…

I'm agog at all the resentment against coaches children in this thread. Do people have any idea how much time goes into being a VOLUNTEER football coach? There should be some perks over the parents who rock up on matchday and seeth about their PFB on the sideline not getting everything their way.

OP academics are highly competitive, and kids are picked up from a very young age. It's unlikely your DS will be able to stroll into one now. Contact all the clubs near you, ask if there will be trials. Look on the FA website, all tables and results are published - you'll see the level each team is at. Other parents have already done that graft that's how they know what teams are the best. Probably the parents in your DS's team do know which league they're in but they know they're in the right league for the kids.

Grassroots football relies on parent volunteers to function. They are not angels and they are not perfect - of course their main motivation to give up all this time is because their own son is interested, and no, they don't always pick man of the match perfectly etc. If you think your DS is too good for the team (which loads of parents do, by the way, makes managing the team a right PITA at times) then seek out other opportunities.

I agree. I am amazed people are still encouraging their kids to play rugby. My kids London independent hasn’t played rugby for years and there are other independent schools (Highgate / city) who don’t play and other schools should be following in my opinion.

My ds plays football and honestly he knows how good all his age group and year above and below are and so do his friends. And the coaches of the various teams. As he gets known boys will ask him to join their team
You do seem to be coming across a bit like your son is too good for the team, even if he is he will still be learning at the team he's st. Let him see the season out, and then look at attending some training sessions over the summer at teams that are higher up in the division. If he's as good as you think he'll be snapped up.