To expect dp to not piss on the seat

[Biscuits1011]

He had been drinking, a lot. But he came in, Loud as anything.. woke our 4 month old baby up, nearly fell into the cot, kept farting and it absolutely stank so much it made me nearly sick, kept talking loudly, then snoring loudly…

aibu to make him sleep downstairs?? He has also pissed all over the seat, I’m leaving it for him to clean, as we have 3 boys too and they are told enough to clean up after themselves so why shouldn’t a grown man!

because he woke the baby I’ve been up most of the night with her, she’s normally a good sleeper but all the loudness from him was too much. He also kept telling me to hand her to him?!?! While he was really drunk and could hardly stand… erm nope!

anyway. Normally a good partner, and he’s a great dad to be fair, but he is huffy and thinks I was wrong to make him sleep downstairs. I don’t think I am at all but then I can be quite stubborn. So aibu?? He actually reads mumsnet so a big chance he will see this!

Wetting himself and a chair, as a grown adult with no medical needs? Totally unacceptable and totally not normal. I can't imagine how cross I would be at that aspect alone. Horrendous.

I can honestly say that all three adults living this house, including myself and dh, have never wet themselves whilst drunk! That's simply not normal behaviour.

I’m assuming op means toilet seat @Abraxan

I would be more worried about him wanting to hold baby, believing himself capable of looking after him at that stage of drunkenness. The loo seat thing is irritating though

i do, although he had actually wet himself while drunk!

I wouldn't be able to respect a grown man that pissed over the toilet seat because he was too drunk and then proceeded to wake up a 4 month old, I'm so sorry you have to put up with that.

It's very important for him to get off his nut when he has a 4 month old baby at home - poor wee fella

It sounds like you aren't blowing this out of proportion.....he was drunk and loud, you solved a problem by sending him to sleep downstairs.

He's probably pissy because he's hungover and embarrassed but he needs to realise that it's unacceptable to wake a household just because you've been out on the lash, actions have consequences.

As to the loo seat.....he needs to do sit down wees in the house of he's drunk....problem solved!

If he can say, out loud, “I think it’s reasonable to come home wasted, piss on the seat and demand to hold the baby” then he has a serious problem. If he is just saying “you’re being unreasonable” and not addressing his own behaviour, that’s also a problem. Mind you my tolerance for this kind of bullshit is now at zero, but why shouldn’t it be?

I'd be disgusted with him. Getting that drunk, then coming home and taking everyone miserable, is unacceptable.

The fact you have to ask if you're being unreasonable here is just worrying frankly.

If he's reading this... grow the fuck up and control your drinking, you twat. Your wife was absolutely in the right to make you sleep downstairs in that state.

I second this. And stay away from your tiny baby when you’re so drunk you wet yourself. What a state to get into. And if you ever again go out and get completely bladdered, sleep on the sofa when you get back instead of disturbing your wife and baby, you oaf.

I’ve noticed that the phrase “he’s a great dad” only ever appears in posts where the man is a complete knob.

you Are not wrong lol

I’ve never heard of a woman coming home and waking up a tiny baby and pissing herself. I’d struggle to find any respect at all after that.

Yep. Almost always.

I like to think I'm a great mum, does that make it ok for me to piss all over the place and leave my urine for others to clean?

No? Didn't think so....

Anyway, he's disgusting.... I would 100% pull my oh up on this (although he wouldn't ever do it) ...how your husband isn't MORTIFIED to be so vile is beyond me

Yep, and used mostly because OP is pre-empting LTB-adjacent comments and doesn't want posters to be too harsh lest she see the truth herself. I'm so fed up of these posts on the weekend - yes he's a knob, yes it's outrageous he came home that drunk and belligerent and fucking pissed himself but what are you going to do with it apart from post it online to strangers on a sunday, forget it by Tuesday and wake up when you've spent 40 years with this drunk dickhead and realise all the time wasted on him. Waking babies, drunk as a skunk and pissing money up a wall - or down his trousers and your soft furnishings. Pathetic.

Great dads don’t behave like this. He is a crap husband and father. It’s not fair on the kids. He has a drink problem. Please don’t have any more children with him. The kids will remember this and it will really affect them.