For thinking boyfriend was being disrespectful by initiating sex?

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Without delving into too much information, I have a mild embarrassing illness that comes and goes, but can cause me to be very uncomfortable.
Yesterday evening at around 11pm I had told my boyfriend we could have sex, but then as the night went on my ‘illness’ flared up and I politely explained that I wasn’t really in the mood because of it. My boyfriend was fine and said he hoped I was okay, which I was happy and surprised by as sometimes he can deal with rejection quite badly and it can cause an argument.
Fast forward to the crack of dawn this morning, he messages me on the way to work to ask how my ‘illness’ is. I feel appreciative and glad he checked in on me, and respond saying it’s a little better this morning. Less than 5 minutes later, he then sends me a string of sexual messages unprovoked. I responded quite bluntly, as I was quite upset and felt like he only asked how I was feeling to initiate sex again, and didn’t respect that sex was the last thing on my mind when feeling not well.
He has now phoned me on the way home to says embarrassed and angry that I replied bluntly and rejected him, and jumped on the defence when I explained I felt used and that he doesn’t respect me.
I’ve posted here because this is too embarrassing of a situation to share with friends. AIBU?

Do you normally send each other sexy messages etc?

It would be completely out of the norm for me and DP but if it's something you do then I wouldn't think too much into it.

Perhaps just explain that it's not much of a turn on. You can't say at 9am whther you'll be either well enough or up for it that night. And being a sex pest is a turn off.

It’s a communication issue. You felt like he was only feigning interest in your health to get his leg up. What exactly was said between you both will determine who was being unreasonable.

You are not unreasonable to say no. However an extreme example is if you sent a OTT response cussing him out or something in response which may make you both unreasonable.

If you just said, I don’t appreciate that, stop doing it etc then he should listen and stop being defensive and he’s solely unreasonable

All sounds rather tedious tbh. But sure he's BU

You sound a little bit over sensitive tbh which is understandable if you are unwell. I think it's a bit of an overreaction as he checked how you were feeling before trying to be suggestive, you could have calmly explained how that made you feel rather than cause an argument

I'm not sure which one of you was on the way to work, but as one of you was on the way to work at 9am, how could he be initiating sex?

Wasn't it just flirty text messages?

I can't get past telling him sex was OK at 11pm but not doing it until the "evening went on" and it easy no longer possible.

Yeah you do sound like you’re being over sensitive. Obviously we don’t know what the embarrassing illness is as you haven’t said so we can’t judge fully.
But saying that, it’s just sexy texts from your partner, it’s not like he was physically initiating at the same time you’d said no.
He was sexting you the next morning and he clearly is understanding because he accepted you said no last night, and checked on you this morning. Poor lad probs just had blue balls after being on a promise last night and hoping you’re in the mood again today.
Try not to be so offended, it’s really nothing in the grand scheme of things.

The poor man! Please just dump him and end his suffering.

In this instance i dont think he was out of order but you say Sometimes he can deal with rejection quite badly and it can cause an argument which is a big red flag for me. I hate a sulky man child.