Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Does anyone ever get this feeling?

28 replies

Guesswhatimnotarobot · 23/01/2023 22:09

It’s hard to describe it really, like a sudden very insecure, almost scared feeling? I suppose it’s anxiety of some sort.
For example, last night Dh took Dd, 4 to bed, she ended up sleeping in our bed, as sometimes happens, our dog was up there too.
I was downstairs alone, having some peace, watching tv.
I was coming up to bed and had this feeling, it just gripped me and I felt insecure/scared, I start to worry about what would happen if something happened to us, it might be because we live abroad and I feel less secure when I think like this 🤷🏻‍♀️I start to think I wish we lived near or with my parents/family.
I lay down in the cosiness that was all of us cuddled up together but felt this awful feeling 😒
What is it, does anyone else get it?
I’m sorry, it’s hard to articulate, it’s a fear of sorts.

OP posts:
Jedsnewstar · 23/01/2023 22:11

Its called a panic attack. They can be mild or feel like you are dying.

staciea31 · 23/01/2023 22:13

You need to seek medical advice for this hun as it does sound like a panic attack so best off getting advice or some sort of medication or therapy to keep it under control I was in the same situation good luck darling xx

Original poster
Guesswhatimnotarobot · 23/01/2023 22:13

@Jedsnewstar I don’t think it was a panic attack though?

OP posts:
staciea31 · 23/01/2023 22:14

It may just be severe anxiety hun which is manifesting in other ways do seek some medical advice as there are techniques to deal with this sort of thing x

Original poster
Guesswhatimnotarobot · 23/01/2023 22:15

I’m not panicking etc when this happens (realise a panic attack doesn’t always equal panicking) I’m quite calm, it’s just a feeling of being alone/insecure/scared

OP posts:
Beachbabe1 · 23/01/2023 22:15

I get anxiety attacks like this when I'm due on. Its horrible!

TowerStork · 23/01/2023 22:16

I think I get something related: intrusive thoughts about being in danger. It's only happened a few times when my husband was out and I was alone with the baby. I had a creepy feeling and stayed in the bedroom. In my case, I assume it's related to fears of being unable to protect my baby.

For a work reason, I attended a workshop on self care last year and the instructor said intrusive thoughts are nothing to worry about. It's our mind's way of making sense of things so we can acknowledge them and not over think it. I try to remember that she it makes me feel a little better about it

Original poster
Guesswhatimnotarobot · 23/01/2023 22:16

@Beachbabe1 Would you say this was an anxiety attack? What happens to you?

OP posts:
LynetteScavo · 23/01/2023 22:18

Erm...all the time. I'm almost constantly thinking something awful will happen. Sometimes I voice my feelings and DH is Shock and asks what goes on in my head. Sorry, not much help, but I know what you mean.

LynetteScavo · 23/01/2023 22:21

I believe thinking about awful things that might happen is a way of being prepared if they ever do. Not that they ever have. Hmm

JoyPeaceHealthz · 23/01/2023 22:21

I get this, it's not an "attack"
It's like this low level uncomfortable slightly anxious feeling. Like an awkwardness about something. Just feeling I could have handled it all better. Can't explain it better,, but it's uncomfortable.

Chattycatty32 · 23/01/2023 22:27

It's like being homesick as a grown up

Original poster
Guesswhatimnotarobot · 23/01/2023 22:30

@Chattycatty32 Yes, it’s exactly that…I always feel I want to *Go home or be near my parents…which seems ridiculous at the age of 44, with my own child. I don’t understand why it just comes out of nowhere though..it’s generally more at night

OP posts:
Original poster
Guesswhatimnotarobot · 23/01/2023 22:31

It’s a low level feeling scared feeling…scared of what 🤷🏻‍♀️

OP posts:
StillWeRise · 23/01/2023 22:37

its not nice, but its not a panic attack
you don't need medical advice, this is just the human condition!
it can help to 'observe' the feeling - so, instead of thinking 'oh no, I'm scared and anxious' and feeling overwhelmed by it, simply notice 'oh, I'm feeling anxious, but we are all safe, there's nothing to fear right now, this feeling will pass- it's just a feeling'

Onwayoutsoon · 23/01/2023 23:10

LynetteScavo · 23/01/2023 22:21

I believe thinking about awful things that might happen is a way of being prepared if they ever do. Not that they ever have. Hmm

Never thought of it like that before !

Nightsonthetiles · 23/01/2023 23:12

Guesswhatimnotarobot · 23/01/2023 22:15

I’m not panicking etc when this happens (realise a panic attack doesn’t always equal panicking) I’m quite calm, it’s just a feeling of being alone/insecure/scared

It sounds like an anxiety attack (different from a panic attack). I see a psychologist now to help with my own general anxiety disorder.

Sometimes like you say I can be completely fine not panicking about anything and then this feeling of dread comes into my stomach, like I know something bad is going to happen (but there's nothing immediately threatening or worrisome going on). The feeling of wanting my mum and dad is something I also get.

Generally I find that if I've had prolonged periods of stress or something I'm worried about it gets worse. I find things like meditation, journaling and exercise also really help. Definitely worse in the days after alcohol has been consumed.

AcrossthePond55 · 23/01/2023 23:17

I get this every now and again, but they usually don't last long or can be 'soothed away' with a 'don't be so silly'. I figure it's my 'fight or flight' reaction being put to the test by my subconscious to make sure it's still working, lol. Panic attacks last longer and aren't as easy to get rid of.

I think of it like the Emergency Broadcast System tests on TV here in the US. Every so often the 'tone' comes on, there's a scroll on the bottom of the screen, and a voice saying "This is a test of the EAS. This is only a test...", followed by what you'd do if it was a real emergency, then right back to 'your regularly scheduled programming'. Not sure if you have that in the UK.

user1471462634 · 23/01/2023 23:19

Yes, similar. I put it down to an anxiety attack, I may be wrong but it just comes out of nowhere & it's a feeling of dread in the pit of my stomach, just lasts a minute or so.
Only started during the menopause, a couple of years, never experienced it before then.

heyheymamaway · 23/01/2023 23:26

Yes, I have been experiencing this since I was 14. Usually when I'm feeling peaceful and calm, then it's like the rug is pulled from under you and you feel dread. My dread is existential dread though, not attached to anything tangible.

I still get it but with time, therapy, mindfulness, medication and lots of research it is under control.

My brother has it too, it is common and can be sorted. See your GP and look up 'generalised anxiety'.

You are not alone and this can be fixed.

Tunnocks2022 · 23/01/2023 23:27

Yes I do. Often. But my brother died when I was a child, my DH died when we were in our 30s and I’m dealing with a highly, highly volatile teen at the moment 😬

Can you remember anything you’ve done before that made it ease off? I’m playing spa music on my Alexa right now which may sound totally ridiculous, but it provides the illusion that I’m looking after myself 🤣 and that calms me down for sleep

Summerfun54321 · 23/01/2023 23:50

A bit of melancholy mixed with a little anxiety or adrenaline. Sounds fine to me to feel like that now and again. Speak to a Dr if it's a very regular feeling though.

JudgeRudy · 24/01/2023 00:00

Guesswhatimnotarobot · 23/01/2023 22:15

I’m not panicking etc when this happens (realise a panic attack doesn’t always equal panicking) I’m quite calm, it’s just a feeling of being alone/insecure/scared

It sounds more like dread than a panic. A panic seems to have urgency about it, this sounds more like a black cloud of depression that you've just become acutely aware of but feel resistance is futile as its smothers you. Almost comforting because all you have to do is submit....then justvas suddenly you snap out of it and it leaves a bad taste in your mouth. A kind of temporary existential crisis.
I get this sometimes when I've been running on empty and finally start to relax. It's more disturbing afterwards.

somedogsdo · 24/01/2023 00:24

Yes - my friend and I used to call it 'the dread'. For me, it felt like somebody had suddenly injected me with this horrible sinking feeling but it wasn't a depression type feeling, more a paralysing deep deep isolating fear. Hard to articulate but like the rug was just about to be pulled out from underneath you on your entire life and there was nothing you could do. I still get it occasionally but nothing like as bad as when I was a student.

cassiatwenty · 24/01/2023 00:53

somedogsdo · 24/01/2023 00:24

Yes - my friend and I used to call it 'the dread'. For me, it felt like somebody had suddenly injected me with this horrible sinking feeling but it wasn't a depression type feeling, more a paralysing deep deep isolating fear. Hard to articulate but like the rug was just about to be pulled out from underneath you on your entire life and there was nothing you could do. I still get it occasionally but nothing like as bad as when I was a student.

Yes, I totally get the dread. Keep calm and carry on.