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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

For feeling like I'm losing my mind?

14 replies

IneedcoffeeinanIV · 23/01/2023 02:01

I feel awful even complaining because it seems like such mundane reasons, especially when other people are going through much worse. I'm starting to feel as though I'm slowly losing myself.

I shouldn't complain because on paper I have a great. 2 beautiful healthy little girls, a fiancé that is generally great and a good job. It's just all starting to feel too much. I go back to work from maternity leave within the next few months, my tiny baby will be going into nursery full time and I have a wedding to plan within 8 months. How am I supposed to go from being with my youngest 24/7 to letting someone else look after her and potentially see all her firsts.

I just can't seem to settle myself. I'm tired 24/7, to the point of having headaches everyday for the past 3-4 weeks but here I am wide awake when I could be in bed sleeping.

I just feel so unhappy and I can't figure out why. I get these moments where it's like a weight is on my shoulders and I just feel so out of control of my life and like I'll feel like this forever.

I don't know how much of this post makes sense as to be honest I've not even read what I've wrote. I just needed to talk and not to someone I know

OP posts:
mackthepony · 23/01/2023 02:07

Just have a small wedding

Aldibag · 23/01/2023 02:07

You’re exhausted. Sleep.

donttellmehesalive · 23/01/2023 02:29

I think a tiny baby, a return to work from maternity leave and an imminent wedding would leave most people feeling overwhelmed.

You need to sort your sleep and a wedding 'to do' list.

Unfortunately, the return to work is harder to solve and I think most mothers find this very difficult initially. Do you have any friends or colleagues who have been through it and who you can talk to?

Desertbarncat · 23/01/2023 03:48

Feeling overwhelmed by all those huge life events happening at once is to be expected. Marriage, new baby, return to work- those are all very high on the stress scale.

autienotnaughty · 23/01/2023 05:14

Do you need to work full time? Can you start part time and see how it feels? With regards to wedding have you spoke to your fiancé can he lighten load? Have you spoke to gp? Could his be postnatal depression? Would counselling help?

IneedcoffeeinanIV · 23/01/2023 10:31

Christ, reading this back I sound ridiculous. Thank you for the kind and helpful responses ❤️

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Aldibag · 23/01/2023 11:18

I don’t agree. You don’t sound ridiculous. You sound like there is a lot going on. Keep breathing

Cony23 · 20/04/2023 18:40

Try to live the moment and not stress on what would it be. Anything can change from planning. Will it be big difference on money if you care of your baby for a few months more instead of placing them at nursey ? I am a stay at home mum because it would have been much more expensive ( we have 4) to have someone look after them untill the free school hours, plus it's the education and love a mum give to her child first years does not compare to what they receive in nursery. And I know I will bring fire on my head saying that but although sometimes it's hard as hell, I would better live tight and be with them, their firsts milestones worth a lifetime's work.

SoniyaJonas · 27/04/2023 14:51

It's understandable to feel overwhelmed and unhappy, even when your life appears to be good on paper, and it's important to prioritize taking care of yourself and seeking support when needed.

IneedcoffeeinanIV · 28/04/2023 20:54

Thanks all for your lovely comments ❤️ I'm feeling in a much better place now. DD loves nursery, I've managed to get back into work so much easier than I thought and wedding planning I realised is only as stressful as I make it

OP posts:
IneedcoffeeinanIV · 28/04/2023 20:54

She also said Mama the day before she had her first day at nursery and it was Mothers Day! An absolute treat

OP posts:
Tomatotomatopotatopotato · 28/04/2023 21:05

Happy to read that everything is going more smoothly now, hope your wedding day is wonderful! You didn't sound ridiculous at all in your initial post, just exhausted and overwhelmed.

Mumma · 28/04/2023 21:12

IneedcoffeeinanIV · 28/04/2023 20:54

Thanks all for your lovely comments ❤️ I'm feeling in a much better place now. DD loves nursery, I've managed to get back into work so much easier than I thought and wedding planning I realised is only as stressful as I make it

I needed to see this today. I'm currently at your OP stage. X

IneedcoffeeinanIV · 28/04/2023 21:44

@Mumma I can honestly vouch for the fact it will get better. I occasionally just debated laying in the road I felt that down and when I look back now I'm almost laughing at myself. It's so so hard being a parent and trying to juggle life but the bad parts don't last forever and once the food stuff happens, it makes it feel like the bad things were never an issue.

I hope you start to feel on the other side of it soon ❤️ it does get better I promise

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