Is it just me? The world? Peri menopause??

[Happyharry2003]

Hello
I just don’t know what’s happening to me at the moment. I’m 45 and half of me wants to progress with my career and the other half sees this as far too much hassle! I literally feel so angry and sick every time I think of our current government- even more so as there’s nothing I can do to change or. Even if I could - could I actually be bothered?!

i love my family and my husband but I am just so bored. But I can’t face doing anything about it!

I’ve been on anti depressants for years and this is different. It’s not depression it’s just despair.

i tried hrt patches a year ago but the added hormones made me feel more loopy than I did before so I stopped. I probably should go back to the doctors but I can’t get any appointments which then brings me round to being angry about the world again!!

aibu? Is this normal?!

I'm not married but I know what you mean. I am 52 and feel torn, do I want to go up a grade or work part time. It's not clear. Least of all to me!

I think I'd be going up a grade to ''show them''. But what I really want is an easy life.

I'm not on hrt or anti-depressants but I feel I'm procrastinating so much. I never do anything fun for myself because I just do housework/work/or veg watchign youtube clips. Have lost a bit of get up and go.

Absolutely! Progressing in work feels at the moment I would be doing it to prove to ‘them all’ (I don’t even know who they are!!) that I am capable and not invisible! Sorry you feel rubbish as well x

I’d go back to your gp op. I went through similar, and it was shit. It was menopause related in my case, late 40s, and I am finally on an HRT dose that works for me. In conjunction with Sertraline I feel almost normal! It took a bit of juggling of meds, and accepting things took time to bed in though. I also stopped drinking alcohol as that made me more maudlin and depressed! Good luck

Thanks. I gave up alcohol a few years ago. I think I should go back to docs - if I can get an appointment!!!!

I don't know but since my menopause I just feel like I'm too old to fight anymore. I feel all I can do is focus on not messing up my kids.

I’m 48 not tried HRT or antidepressants yet. My temperament has always been on the low mood darker side of the track think a mix of Wednesday Adams and Eeyore. Perimenopause seems to be making these personality traits worse and I also have aching joints. I’m seeing my GP in a couple of weeks to discuss my options. Work wise I decided to leave a very stressful career and I am now self employed and earn a decent hourly rate the only issue is I just can’t be bothered some weeks. I am hoping to retire at 55 on a very modest pension and do a masters in a different field and maybe work freelance in this new field.

I was the same but I changed job which I had been in a while and it made all the difference. New faces, new challenges and a far less toxic misogynistic management (it is amazing what you silently put up) has helped a lot.

Thanks all it’s good to know I’m not the only one. The bit about staying sane for my children resonated with me. Just don’t want them to remember me as a mum that spent half the day complaining about being tired. I fall asleep on the sofa at about 7pm every night after work. I am bone achingly exhausted. I have a cleaner - I don’t know what else I can do to make things easier. I can’t work part time yet as we can’t afford it - plus I‘ know I’d end up working 5 days for part time pay!

Feeling more depressed than before and feeling blah and unmotivated etc are all known symptoms of peri/menopause. I would definitely try to get an appointment with your GP @Happyharry2003 (I appreciate how difficult it is at the moment for many people), and try a different kind of HRT. I know it's not a magic bullet for everyone, but finding the right type and dose can really help.

Menopause is such a bastard and there are so many symptoms that until recently weren't being linked to it by medical professionals/women going through it. It really is amazing the extent to which reducing oestrogen affects physical/mental health in mid-life. I hope you manage to get it sorted out.

When faced with staying in my previous role which was senior, but easy, could just coast along, or go for promotion, I went for the latter. I felt, for me anyway, being challenged and busy in my role was better for my mental health. Coasting along in a slow slide to retirement just felt depressing - and I needed the money! - so far it’s working for me.

You might need a doctor for the physical stuff..but the rest? If you're not pissed off and angry about the world right now you're just not paying attention!

I'd say you need a big change. New job or new big hobby.