Am I being paranoid or is she trying to make me look shit?

[EmpressOfTheSofa]

I’m the manager of a store, very small company (three stores). I’ve only been with the company for a few months.

The assistant manager has been there longer than me (and I know went for my job). She’s a bit of a pain in my arse, tries to tell me what to do all the time, questions everything I ever say and can be weirdly aggressive in her manner towards me. I have already had to have a semi formal talk with her about her attitude and she’s reined it in a bit with me, mostly.

Anyway. I’m on annual leave this week. Apart from the fact she has been sending me multiple queries a day (all of which she should have been able to work out herself) there have been a few messages in the group chat (which goes to all the owners/head office/managers) that I feel are aimed at trying to throw me under the bus. She’s made herself look stupid each time tbf but I think I need to deal with this.

#1 ‘empress didn’t order enough X last week so we need extra this week’.
X is an item that I don’t order, it gets sent out by Head Office automatically.

#2 ‘we don’t have any Y and Empress hasn’t ordered any so can you send some’. My boss replied to say our system is showing we have lots of Y so we need to do a full stock take as if that’s wrong what else is. Surprise surprise we did indeed have plenty of Y.

#3 ‘It doesn’t look like XYZ was done last week so should I do it now?’ It WAS done, but yes you need to do again today if it needs doing and why are you even asking this on the group chat?

So. Am I being paranoid here or is she actively trying to make out I’m not doing my job properly? And do I just let her carry on and hoist herself or pull her up on it when I go back?

This

Yes! She has raised the issue and you will be doing your job by ensuring she gets the correct training to fill her knowledge gaps.

You have the proof, as does everyone else. Be a wonderful, proactive, supportive boss 🙂

It sounds like she’s jealous of you. She is most likely gutted that she’s been there longer but they’ve given the manager job to someone new. I can see why they wouldn’t of put her as manager from the examples you gave.
I am going to say that she is most likely trying to throw you under a bus, but you sound a lot more competent than her so I really don’t think you have anything to worry about.
I can see why this is bothering you though, especially when you work with colleagues like this all day it can be draining. I would 100% pull her up on things more often and cc in anyone higher up and make them aware of what is going on.

It's always difficult line managing someone who went for your job. In my experience they almost always start by trying to dominate/undermine you.

I think you need to play the higher game. Like others have said, if she genuinely needs training then enforce it. But also just let yourself shine. Do a great job, price your worth. She'll soon come unstuck and will either start to respect you or will likely leave.

The fact your manager didn't promote her when the odds were in her favour says it all. They clearly don't think she's good enough for the role so I wouldn't even think anything else of it, beyond addressing when you get back to work about correct procedures (including who to communicate with about what).

She could be panicking and thinking that if something is wrong she doesn’t wish it to be her fault. She’d rather it was your fault and her cleaning up the mess. She clearly wouldn’t write erroneous stuff like that to everyone if she didn’t think it true.

I’ve come across people like this, she’s so desperate she’s not taking the time to check properly snd making herself look an idiot.

id personally speak to your manager and present a plan on how to address this, as she could escalate it and cause everyone some pain.

id go with keeping your enemies close, and try to take her under your wing.

Ha, she’s going to shoot herself right in the foot. Sit quietly, watch and enjoy.

Ask her

ignore her behaviour but just out of interest why were you still looking at the work chat when you're on AL ?

There's always one that will throw you under the bus these days.

I find it really odd how that rarely happened thirty years ago.

I think it might be linked to the 'never a wrong answer' culture that pervaded education in the nineties and still endures today. It means that young people are never taught how to deal with being wrong so will have a tendency to blame others when things go awry.

In your case, @EmpressOfTheSofa this colleague of yours is protecting her feelings of inadequacy by trying to make you look the inadequate one.

The multilevel WhatsApp group seems weird and not necessary.

I think you speak should still notify to your line manager of it - in writing so there’s an email trail of evidence.

If she’s got it in for you, who knows when you might need back up of her behaviours.
Record everything she does in writing - date, time and what she did.

Sounds a very unprofessional business

as for what you post about, you are her manager. so manage her

I knew what was coming when you said she didn't get the job herself

Definitely avoid getting into WhatsApp chitchat about it and maybe have another quiet word in person (documenting everything of course). If that doesn't work, you may have no choice but to start a formal, full disciplinary, but hopefully she'll rein it in before it comes to that

The company should also take some responsibility. When she was turned down doe the job as Manageress and an outsider was brought in, they should have made it clear that she was to helpful and any animosity would not be tolerated.

Either she sucks it up and accepts they didn’t get the job or she leaves.

You could well be writing her annual performance and probationary period reports.

Therefore, keep careful notes about her, including any action you have taken as a result of her drop offs, retraining, advice, instructions. Make sure you include dates, details, examples, her reactions etc, in fact anything you feel is relevant. This will demonstrate you have performed your role properly and covers you if the need arises.

Just try to remember that old saying “never stop your enemy when she’s making a mistake”

Is she like this when you are around - asking loads of questions, pointing out stock issues (which aren't there), ordering issues (again when no ordering needs to be done) and tasks that should be carried out and when and by which staff member?

If she is only doing this while you're away, she is definitely pissed that she didn't get the role and is certainly trying her best to throw you under the bus but is making a complete cats pyjamas of it all.

You need to flag it with management that even though you're on leave, you can deal with this when you get back. In the meantime, if they can do anything that might begin the process of scheduling training for her that would really be appreciated and you'll pick it up when you get back. Then when you get back, preferably in the first couple of days, schedule a meeting with her. I wouldn't go semi-formal with the meeting, I'd put it on a formal footing (she had her first one as semi-formal so this is escalating the style of meeting) and present her with a training plan and if she isn't interested then I think you might have to give her a formal warning and the next time she does anything that is out of line, she has to leave.

If she is as good as she herself thinks she is, she will surely walk into plenty of other jobs in a flash (especially if you write a glowing reference).

She’s trying to make you look bad and failing. Do you have regular meetings with boss. I’d raise it as you can see there’s a training need for her evidenced by x and y on leave. She really has gifted you some gems on a plate.
You obviously want to avoid next time on leave.

Great plan - definitely use it as a way to highlight her incompetence. I would even itemise to boss - 'just letting you know that I reviewed the queries from X and will be revisiting the following areas of training with her: ' and do a list of bullets of where she made mistakes. Including contacting you on a personal number while you were away and reaching out to the wrong people when she had problems.

100% what @Chickalettaetta said.

I remember getting a piece of advice from a senior colleague in a similar situation which was ‘play the ball, not the player’ ie. don’t think about what you already know/suspect about the person or their motivations, just address exactly what they’ve done as if there were no personalities at play at all and proceed accordingly.

So from what she’s written when you weren’t there it sounds like she needs a bit of a refresher. Reasonable possibility she’ll feel personally aggrieved, or question the need to listen to you as her manager, because she’s been there longer. If so, I’d refer her to the messages she sent, which do indicate that despite the time she’s been there, she’s a bit unclear on certain key aspects of her role and that of others in your organisation.

(hehehe)

You don’t need to reply to the chat whilst on AL.

I would book an informal meeting with her upon your return. She needs to know how to use chats with senior leaders properly - they need to be made aware of issues, but not absolutely mundane things that could be sorted out at a store level or if she checked things properly before posting a message. No one needs pointless messages in their feed.

Her message about no stock of Y would have rightfully concerned the leaders if the system is showing it in stock. She should have checked the shop properly before posting that. Is she aware of correct procedures and where stock is kept etc. Who can she contact about basic things in your absence?

I would go right back to basics with her and give her full training again as there’s clearly gaps in her knowledge, regardless of her being there longer than you.

Can you get her taken out of the group chat when you go back?

And put a training session into her diary first available slot, first thing on Monday.

So first job when you get back is to instigate basic training for her since she clearly doesn’t understand what her role entails. Explain that you want her to be able to take on more senior roles but that it is clear she isn’t ready since even simple stock control defeats her, be positive, cheerfully remind her that if and when another managerial post comes up you want her to be able to apply in the knowledge that she will be ready to apply and be successful this time🙂

I’d say she’s done her best to throw you under the bus in your absence, and it’s backfired, so you need to move fast because she will continue to look for opportunities to undermine you. It sounds as though you are her line manager if you have already have a semi formal talk with her. As such I’d have another, pronto, and make it clear that you won’t tolerate such behaviour in future. Tell her that in light of the obvious gaps in her knowledge she has demonstrated in her email queries to you and in the group chats, you are recommending to higher management that she needs to fill in the gaps in that knowledge with extra training before you can trust her to fill in for you in your absence.

I agree - I think you should make it clear that based on her poor performance this week, another manager may be drafted in during your future AL as she cannot be trusted to manage the store without further training.

You're not paranoid but are correctly assessing that she's tedious trouble which is why you're in the managerial role. PP who suggested sending her for training is spot on. Also, I agree with other PP that you should not engage via WhatsApp.