Inviting children to a wedding

[Deedippy]

So we have finally decided to get married at the end of the year after many years together. Going for a medium size ish, not too formal wedding. So there will be children at our wedding, ours, nieces and nephews and also a few children of very close friends who we see frequently. My partner has quite a few friends that he doesn't see very often due to distance but that are good friends he has known for years and some of them have children, none of which we have ever met. So aibu to just invite the couples and not their children (none of them have more than one and all are under 3) I know it might not always be possible to get childcare or they may not want to come without but I know one couple will be quite happy to have a child free night away.

Not RTFT but getting married in June, we’ve only invited select children (family and friends we see regularly). Some people have expected their children to be invited but we simply cannot accommodate everyone’s children and have told them as much. If they can’t attend due to childcare we understand. I also just don’t want a bunch of random children there, some we’ve only met a handful of times.

Most of our friends are happy to ditch the kids for a day but we’re certainly not selling it like either. This is just what they have said in passing.

Not sure how you are getting that I think the B&G should invite everyone's dc.
I am a big fan of child free weddings.

What I actually said was
a)It's your wedding, so you can invite who you want to.
b)It seems perfectly reasonable to me not to invite dc you don't even know

so am totally in support of any B&G who don't invite dc of friends.

But the impression from the OP (which has changed slightly with the post after mine, giving more detail, but obviously I was commenting before that) was that there were going to be quite a lot of small children there.

I stand by the fact that it is quite annoying to be surrounded by loads of small children at a function that you have gone to without your dc, when you would probably be anticipating it being a much more adult orientated day.

Weddings with no dc are fine
Weddings with loads of dc are fine
Weddings with just the B&Gs dc or may DN are fine
Wedding with LOADS of small dc (which we now know isn't the case, but that is what I had perceived from earlier post), when you have made arrangements not to bring yours would be a bit annoying. Still, however totally up to the B&G, I was just putting forward my pov of what I would be thinking in that scenario.

Don’t invite them if you haven’t met them!!

you have no relationship with them! Just invite the ones you know.

this wedding is about you guys!

It’s your wedding so you do what, and I mean EXACTLY what you want. It’s not about anyone else.

we had what I call a “semi- child free” wedding where we had a handful of children (who were my first cousins and all 8+ at the time) but extended family’s/friend’s children were categorically not invited. Of course one person kicked up a fuss, but guess what? We see them once a year at most now, so I couldn’t care less!!!

anyone that cares about you will be there, or politely tell you why they can’t be and that will be it

as long as it’s far enough in advance I’m sure most people can sort childcare anyway

Opinions on this please...We are getting married abroad next year & have a no kids policy except our own and niece and nephew. My brother has a partner with 4 kids which are not his (we are not close with them) I'm not particularly a fan of his partner anyway (she has issues but she is mentally abusive and makes sure my brother doesn't visit his family or even our parents) Our whole family have kept our opinions to ourselfs but it blew up tonight when he said he can't come to the wedding as he can't tell her kids why his biological son is going but they aren't. (I already know this is coming from her as he said he was going with our without her to us a few months ago) Our wedding is abroad for our close family members and i see my nephew more than my brother does. I am not in anyway close to her or her kids (see them maybe twice a year at most)

should have said his biological son isn't to her