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Original poster

When do holidays become holidays again?

28 replies

Addictedtohappyvalley · 17/01/2023 17:19

Back from a few days away with Dh and Dd, 4. It was nice to be in a different location, but just hard work 🙈
Dd wouldn’t sleep until really late and then woke at 5 am, so was shouting and grumpy all the next day. I know it’s the different routine etc, but is this normal? At what age does it become more relaxing? I’m only talking Dh and I maybe being able to sit on the balcony and watch the sunset with a glass of wine etc

OP posts:
berksandbeyond · 17/01/2023 17:21

I have a 4 year old and we love to travel. Yes the holidays are different, a lot less day drinking and lying reading by the pool, but that was kind of expected. We can certainly sit on the balcony and have a glass of wine, and have been able to since she was a baby.

Rhythmisadancer · 17/01/2023 17:27

I found once the kids could both swim holidays became more relaxing - they wore themselves out in the pool / sea all day(Dad was Parent No1 for this while I read my book), then they would be a bit more tired in the evening, so even if they weren't in bed they were reading or colouring or something, and then they slept well. Give them a dark room and we'd get a lie-in too!

MrsTerryPratchett · 17/01/2023 17:27

About 7. It get great around 10-12.

EcoCustard · 17/01/2023 17:35

I have 4 Dc eldest is 8, youngest is nearly 4. Just back from a week away and was lovely. Youngest was tired after busy days and was most relaxed holiday yet. I’m not expecting to be able to read an entire book on my holiday anytime soon but I do prefer being in the pool with them or seeing stuff. We enjoyed a G&T in the evenings although we were shattered.

Coconut80 · 17/01/2023 17:36

When they leave home. Once they are teenagers it is easier but still not a real holiday. I'm fifty and both mine are at uni 18 and 20. We are just back from a week in Madeira it was wonderful. I loved trips with the kids camping and villas abroad but it was never a selfish and relaxing holiday like now. Eating where and when you fancy and doing trips just the two of us x

ShirleyPhallus · 17/01/2023 17:36

I only do holidays with babies / toddlers where there is an element of childcare included in the holiday. Otherwise it’s just parenting in an environment where you don’t have all your own stuff and that isn’t good for anyone

devildeepbluesea · 17/01/2023 17:38

I’m single and took DD away with my DF when she was 4. She’s quite an ‘old for her age’ child and always has been, but I remember that holiday as being lovely, even if I did have to watch her in the pool. DF only watched her for about 45mins while I used the gym.

We've been away several times since then (she’s 9 now) and it gets more fun every year.

LordSugarTits · 17/01/2023 17:39

We've always loved our holidays with kids. You just adapt and plan differently

Lovetotravel123 · 17/01/2023 17:44

I think it kind of needs reframing and calling it ‘travel’ rather than ‘holiday’. Once we stop expecting to relax then we can appreciate the adventure and discovery side of it more. Yes, it’s tiring, but always great to see a new place.

MissCalamity · 17/01/2023 17:44

Over 8 years of age I'd say and able to swim. We went on holiday last August abroad and my youngest is 8 and she was off swimming with her older brother and going to fetch herself drinks/ice cream. They did want me to come on the slides with then quite a lot but that was too hard to do 🤣
In the evening she was running around the park area with her new mates so only came back to our table for drinks.
It actually felt like a holiday for me!!

LlynTegid · 17/01/2023 17:51

About 17, when they go on holiday without you. Brings a new set of problems though.

BogRollBOGOF · 17/01/2023 17:54

I remember camping when they were 5 & 7 and relaxing while they played in a group with loose supervision. It was lovely to not have to watch them completely hawk-like.

Mine have never been the kids' club type. DS1 does not do enforced fun!

It gets easier as they get older. Getting confident at swimming in deep water has been another unclench stage.

Phos · 17/01/2023 17:55

I think it depends on the kind of holiday you want, where you go and honestly what your kid is like as an individual. We went to Turkey last year when DD had just turned 5 and it was brilliant. Yes we still had to be quite hands on with her but going in the pool or doing activities or going on boat trips was quite fun. She usually wanted to go to Kids Club for a couple of hours so we had time to sit and read or do our own thing then. At night we'd go to the entertainment or out for dinner so she would be up later than usual but we're lucky she never does the waking at 5 thing so we got a good lie in too. (In fact only person up at 5 was me bagging sunbeds but then I'd go back to bed for a bit.)

Ponoka7 · 17/01/2023 17:56

My GC are 5 and 8 and the last holidays were great. They understand safety a bit better, that they need to wind down/eat when we say. They'd also chill on iPads and as said, you can tire them out more successfully.

Lincslady53 · 17/01/2023 17:59

We loved our holidays when our kids were younger. A mix of hotels abroad, camping or caravanning in the uk, hotels in the uk. We changed to suit as they got older and can honestly say that although hard work, we never had one we regretted. However, our first holiday on our own. To an adults only AI hotel was absolute bliss. We are now retired but am waiting to get the ok from the doc after an op, and can't wait to get abroad.

Mumof1andacat · 17/01/2023 18:01

It depends on the child really. My ds has always been easier going so at home or on holiday he always slept well, he's never been one for running off, shouting and being grumpy so holidays with or without him are like holidays

Orangello · 17/01/2023 18:03

4.5 in our case. Before it was the same childwrangling, just different location with non-sleeping, not eating and jetlagged toddlers. But I clearly remember the holiday to Thailand when DC2 was 4.5 and it was an actual proper relaxing holiday.

mycatsanutter · 17/01/2023 18:08

Seen quite a lot of posts like this lately . Think we must just be lucky with our ds and sleeping in different places , when we go abroad he would go to bed about 11 ish and get up between 8-9 . The days would be spent in the pool or at the beach , we love going away .

MajorCarolDanvers · 17/01/2023 18:08

We take the GPs with us on holiday so that always helped.

When they get old enough to enjoy holiday clubs - you get a break. Then they learn to swim and the poolside gets easier.
Then they become teenagers and it gets worse again.
Then they don't want to come anymore. 😂

Teaandtoast3 · 17/01/2023 18:18

Our last holiday when they were 6 & 8 was okay. They mostly wanted to play in the pool all day

WoofingUpTheIncorrectShrub · 17/01/2023 18:20

My best holidays have probably all been since I separated from XH! But that's a different thread.

Coincidentally, first time taking DC abroad by myself they were 10 and nearly 8 and both competent swimmers. We had lots of fun doing various things together (camping) and our last campsite had a pool and lots of other English families. They made some friends and played happily in the pool. I actually managed to read a book (!) and another single mum inspired me with her optimism about it being entirely possible to have a better relationship with someone else in the future. It was a massive turning point for me.

I've never wanted to put my kids in a club, but swimming is a game-changer. And I know camping's not for everyone, but it is great for kids to develop independence. Mine are 14 and 11 now and I almost had to bribe them away from playing with other kids last summer because I wanted to spend some time with them myself!

iliketartan · 17/01/2023 18:22

When mine turned 18 and no longer holidayed with us - only another 14 years to go OP Grin

Radiatorvalves · 17/01/2023 18:23

I’ve always loved holidays with kids, although it’s nice to go away without them too (usually for work with a day added). We like to do similar things… Sometimes nice to go away with friends but that can have challenges. We did s/c when younger so no stressing about late nights or babysitting.

Icannever · 17/01/2023 18:27

Just had a lovely holiday with mine aged 10 and 12. However we found when they were younger that they like to go back to the same places and the second or third time in a place is better as they sleep better and seem more chilled out

FlounderingFruitcake · 17/01/2023 18:27

Gosh that sounds tough! Mine are 5 and 2, and definitely have their moments, but I’ve never not been able to have a relaxing glass of wine of an evening. They’re decent at going to bed and happy to roll whatever if there’s a time difference.