Background: We are 40 and 42. DP is a very hardworking, generous and committed partner. When we met he had been most of his adult life in a previous relationship (he had 2 kids), I had been living a much more carefree existence with no long-term partner and went out a lot more. I occasionally did a bit of coke (which he knows about), but not since we've been together.
We have a 6 week old baby, so we've mainly been at home for a long time. The other night my adult nephew and his gf were in town and I went out for dinner with them, we had quite a few drinks and a nice evening, DP picked me up from the train station and everything was fine. A couple of days later I realised my debit card was missing. I called the restaurant and asked the waiter who answered if I had left my card there. His reply: "Yes, it was in the bathroom with your rolled up receipt". I said thank you and hung up, only then realising what he had probably been implying - that I had been doing coke in the loos, otherwise why mention the receipt and it being 'rolled up'? I commented about this to DP and then the conversation moved on to when he/we could pick up the card. Anyway I could tell he got into a weird mood and after a lot of hassling him to tell me what was wrong, at 3 a.m. he asked if I had in fact been doing coke with my nephew.... He had heard the phone conversation anyway (waiter was talking loudly) and decided that I definitely had, which obviously would be unacceptable because we have a baby daughter and for various other reasons.
I absolutely wasn't doing drugs in the loo, I went in drunk after paying the bill and saying goodbye to my nephew and girlfriend, the card must have still been in my hand so I dumped it somewhere in the bathroom and forgot to pick it up. I imagine the waiter who said the receipt was rolled up was not the one who found it and it was in fact just folded around the card, but probably this got lost in communication between the staff who perhaps are fed up with customers taking drugs in the loo, which is why he had a dig at me on the phone.. who knows.
DP keeps saying how weird it is that my card would be found there and doesn't believe me even though he says he does. Before asking me he also googled something about reasons for cards being found in loos (??) to try and work out the statistical likelihood of there being an innocent reason.. I guess this is my AIBU, I don't understand why he didn't just ask me outright instead of giving weight to the waiter's judgmental and inaccurate comment and his weird Google search. I'm hoping that when we pick up the card the receipt will still be with it and it will be clear that it wasn't used for snorting coke. But we shouldn't have got to this point in the first place. I feel pretty low. Does anyone else find it reasonable to have drunkenly left a card in the loo and it not be related to drugs?