To ask if this is a lot to deal with

[Changedusernameagain007]

I'm baffled by my therapists response so am looking for another perspective incase I'm being oversensitive.

I started therapy for the first time a few weeks ago. There is so much I want to unpick so I planned to be in it for the long haul

This is the mental list I made for her:
Childhood sexual abuse
Childhood neglect
Adulthood work bullying
Nervous breakdown
Lifelong anxiety

I'm going stop there because writing it down is painful. Anyway things were going fine untill I mentioned the work bullying that took place for about a year. Her exact response was "those things happen to all of us at some stage in our lives, no need to dwell on it" and then didn't want to talk about it any further.

I haven't been back to see her.
The bullying involved other staff members humiliating me in front of everyone in a daily basis. Name calling etc.

Please be honest.do I need to grow a pair?

No decent therapist should shut you down no matter what you are talking about. That is YOUR hour to unpick the parts of your life you need help with. Find someone else.

Aside from the fact that is very dismissive and wrong of her to say...

There's no such thing as a good or bad therapist - only one that is right for you. Find someone else who you feel comfortable with.

Find a different therapist, a good one will want to actively listen.

I found it a very, very mixed bag, ones which were employed by a charity, nhs or via employer were miles better than self employed.

You absolutely need to find a new therapist. When H left me I spoke to a lady who said 'it sounds like you define yourself by him, you need to change that' No love, I was with him 16 years, and I'm heartbroken. The therapist I now have is amazing, and absolutely has helped me so much in the past 12 months.

It’s not about whether you should grow a pair it’s about whether your therapist should listen to your past experiences that have caused you pain and help you- which obviously is their main duty.

Find another therapist.

A therapist I once went to had the same response about a different issue, another therapist said she had probably encountered x issue and hadn't dealt with it so couldn't help me, it made sense..

@Timeforabiscuit iv been on the NHS list for months now and have reached out to charities with no reply back to emails or calls. So for the time being I'm going private as I'm desperate

@Rowen32 that did cross my mind.

I'm not convinced that it does happen to everyone? And even if it does, it's YOUR reaction to it that you were seeing the therapist to discuss, no?
Bin her. Find someone else.

That's such an odd thing to say to such a big problem I'm wondering if those were her exact words or you're instead paraphrasing a vibe you got?

Either way, probably good you're looking elsewhere.

@SleeplessInEngland nope not paraphrasing, that was exactly what she said and then moved on quickly. If she returned to the issue I would be ok with that but she dismissed it.

Hi Op

Don't ignore what your gut instinct is telling you,you know its time to move on and find a better more sensitive intuitive new Therapist you feel comfortable with and just gets you(understands you)

The current Therapist you have is obviously way out of her depth and handling your trauma relating to your ex work colleagues,

And No I am not Convinced everyone has suffered work colleagues who have been totally Arseholes,(despite what your Therapist thinks/Says,

Whether she realises it or not. she is seriously undermining your trauma by mimising it,

Get rid of her A.s.a.p

She is No good anymore and she will set back your healing processes from trauma significantly.

Best of Luck

Take care x

Of course not everyone deals with those issues - child abuse? Sounds like she had some issues of her own.

Even if you had zero issues and just wanted to see a therapist for a chat (like they do in America) that is also fine.

Maybe she felt completely out of her depth. Hope you find a better therapist soon.