DD15 going about with a boy 18

[Ddolderbf]

DD is 15 and in year 11. She hasn’t had a boyfriend before and is autistic (high functioning). She met this lad who’s 18 and dropped out of college after a year he’s now an apprentice. He does seem a nice boy and DD is very happy being with him. I have spoken to her at length and I am convinced that he does want to be in this relationship- no coercion as such. My concern is that she is vulnerable due to her ASD and he is a few years older. Also, he can drive, drink, etc whereas DD is still classed as a child. He’s quite vulnerable himself- no sen but just quite shy, quiet, doesn’t have that many friends and I think he may be a little immature. I don’t really know what to do but I wanted to post for advice? Aibu to be concerned about this?

My DS is about to turn 18 and he sounds like this lad, I wouldn't be happy if he was with a 15 year old. Not to mention the accusations that could be made about him.

She is not classed as a child, she is a child. Whilst banning her from seeing him could backfire, I would do what you can to slow the relationship down.

I have 2 children the same age, a DS 18 and DD almost 15. Maturity wise I’d say they are almost at the same level, as I find girls do mature faster than boys. However this might not be the case here. I would be concerned if it was my son just because she’s underage so I’d definitely be discouraging this (but taking her to sort contraception anyway as I was a teen mum and do not want that for my DD). But I wouldn’t be coming down too heavy if it was either my DS or DD as I know that will just push them away. I’d expect his mum is just as concerned. How far off 16 (and age of consent) is your DD?

Concerned? Yes you should be and you need to put a stop to it. You already know she is a vulnerable child. She is less socially and emotionally developed than an 'average' (I'm trying with the language but also autistic so please forgive I'm not trying to offend) 15 year old.

Valid to be concerned, I think for both of them.

I would be concerned too op. I would certainly be chaperoning the hell of out the relationship if I allowed it to continue. I agree with pp that I would be concerned too if I were his parents due to the ages involved.

Is there anyway you could speak to his parents, as a mother of a son, I'd want to know. My stepdd was in a similar situation at that age, ultimately it eventually fizzled out but it was concerning at the time. She's 24 now and she just sees him as a bit weird now.