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Original poster

Was she the reason he left ?

39 replies

justdoingasurvey · 13/01/2023 16:03

Is there any way in earth that a man who was married and had a newborn could be innocently texting his ex from ten years previous towards the end of the marriage ?

Nothing Romantic or sexual but innocent exchanges , yet he then left his wife and hooked up with said ex three months later.

Was she the reason he left or rather was a reconnection the reason he left?

He said he was desperate unhappy in the marriage but something tells me that this was a suitable excuse for anyone who asked him and his newly reconnected girlfriend.

OP posts:
KirstenBlest · 13/01/2023 17:14

@justdoingasurvey , sorry, I took your username too literally.
My guess that he left his wife because he found being a husband and father less appealing than rekindling an old fire.
It's a big red flag.

DashboardConfessional · 13/01/2023 17:20

How long was he married? Sounds like he gets a five-year itch and the wife was unfortunate enough to marry him and get pregnant in his own personal few-year window of interest in her.

Original poster
justdoingasurvey · 13/01/2023 17:22

Three years married

OP posts:
Sunsetintheeast · 13/01/2023 17:25

Run like fuck would be my advice. Any man that does this is not a good man to be relied upon.

Jusmakingit · 13/01/2023 17:46

Yes I agree he shouldn’t have ‘fathered a child’ and then left but also people change, situations change etc. I am sure if you spoke to his wife or him directly there may be more reasons to the end of his marriage . Maybe he was trapped by his wife , maybe he didn’t actually want children , there’s I’m sure a million reasons behind it but people on MN are so quick to judge

Sasha07 · 13/01/2023 18:02

Many years ago now, my ex left me while I was pregnant and with a baby already, he was father to both DC and he just got progressively worse until we split. Since then, he's just cocklodged with different women, who he has got pregnant within months. He doesn't see any of them, although I hear he's got the latest one pregnant and they seem happy. But they're not even a year in to the relationship yet...

I would steer well clear from any man who could easily walk away from a child (not sure if the man in op kept regular contact with his), avoid any man who could abandon a woman who has not long birthed his child, run like fuck from any man who was wanting his feet under table within months of getting together.

But ofcourse I'm only talking from my own experience. But I'd definitely throw this guy back. If you had any confidence in him, you wouldn't have posted. You're clearly wary of him (well done for spotting potential red flags!!) Listen to your gut feeling, not your heart.

BunchHarman · 13/01/2023 18:22

When all’s said and done, he abandoned his wife with a newborn baby to shack up with an ex girlfriend that he’d been secretly texting. So therefore, he’s a cunt.

EmmaDilemma5 · 13/01/2023 18:26

My guess is he didn't like the responsibility that comes with having kids.

So he took the easy way out. Connected with an ex who presented an easier life and ran. Just a form of escapism.

It didn't work then and it won't work again. My bet is he'll come running back in a few months. Don't let him.

He's a coward and I'd be relieved he went before there was any impact on the child. The baby will never know any different and, as long as parents can stay civil, will likely be emotionally unaffected.

nc1013 · 13/01/2023 18:28

BunchHarman · 13/01/2023 18:22

When all’s said and done, he abandoned his wife with a newborn baby to shack up with an ex girlfriend that he’d been secretly texting. So therefore, he’s a cunt.

This!!

I doubt the text chats with his ex are as innocent as he's making out (why would you trust him to be honest?)

Even if he is being honest with you he's still a cunt (as above!)

LIZS · 13/01/2023 18:37

So he was with his ex (any dc?) they split up and he moved in with a woman who had his baby, left back to ex then ? Why did he split with ex the second time, has he ever lived independently as an adult, without a partner? Does not have a very attractive history.

Original poster
justdoingasurvey · 13/01/2023 18:42

He's very dependent that's for sure. They broke up because she was the crazy ex and he was stunted and behaved like a child judging by the way he speaks... now that the blinkers are off me .
He needs to be in a relationship clearly.

OP posts:
HappiestHippo123 · 13/01/2023 18:46

BunchHarman · Today 18:22
When all’s said and done, he abandoned his wife with a newborn baby to shack up with an ex girlfriend that he’d been secretly texting. So therefore, he’s a cunt.

This!

Also did he call an ex a crazy ex? That’s a red flag too. My ex boyfriend with a ‘crazy ex’ tried to strangle me. He seemed lovely initially but I was young, with hindsight I could have made a tent out of the red flags.

DashboardConfessional · 13/01/2023 19:01

"Crazy ex". Yawn.

Throw him back!

LadyMary50 · 13/01/2023 19:16

EmmaDilemma5 · 13/01/2023 18:26

My guess is he didn't like the responsibility that comes with having kids.

So he took the easy way out. Connected with an ex who presented an easier life and ran. Just a form of escapism.

It didn't work then and it won't work again. My bet is he'll come running back in a few months. Don't let him.

He's a coward and I'd be relieved he went before there was any impact on the child. The baby will never know any different and, as long as parents can stay civil, will likely be emotionally unaffected.

RTFT.Op isn’t the wife with the baby🤦‍♀️

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