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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want a cleaner when I work part time

97 replies

Cleanqueennot · 12/01/2023 06:00

I am currently on maternity leave and baby is now 6 months old. I am finding that even though I’m not working at the moment I am struggling to keep up with cleaning. Baby is very needy and we have a large 4 bedroom house. Just hoovering alone would take more than 45 mins (when I do it) and knackers me out so badly and baby doesn’t even nap for that long during the day. I am wondering how on earth I will manage when I’m back at work soon. I will be going back to work part time 3 days a week. So if I’m struggling now I’m off work I think I will struggle once I’m back to work.

Also, I used to work 5 days per week before I went on maternity but one reason I’m going part time is because I want to do stuff with my son on those two days. Our library doesn’t open weekends so I’d like to take him to library once a week and just do generally nice things together like go to the beach etc. not spend those 2 valuable days cleaning the house while he’s watching peppa pig all day! Weekends would also take the pressure off my husband and me, and we could spend that time as a family rather than taking shifts to clean the house.

AIBU to want a cleaner every week/fortnight? Money is tight at the moment on statutory mat pay but once I’m back to work we will be about £1000 better off each month than we are now. It’s a lot less than what I used to earn full time but I think still affordable? I probably wouldn’t want the cleaner in our master bedroom or the office/box room so it would be like cleaning a 2 bedroom house house really (well a large 2 bed house with 3 reception rooms!)

OP posts:
ellesbellesxxx · 12/01/2023 06:03

Go for it! Best thing I did when my babies were little!

BigHeadBertha · 12/01/2023 06:06

No. It's your money and completely your decision how you want to spend it. If you have judgey people around, just don't tell them. :)

BotherThat · 12/01/2023 06:06

If you want a cleaner and can afford one, get one. No angst needed.

Fwiw, I don’t work at all, my kids are in nursery and school and I have a cleaner because doing housework is boring as fuck, and I have the option not to do it.

I find it very telling that as soon as women have the economic means to do so, they tend to outsource housework. It’s because it’s DULL.

FatCatSkinnyRat · 12/01/2023 06:08

Do it! I work part time (0.6 FTE) and have a cleaner - 4 hours every week and she has changed my life.

My kids are in high school so I don't even have the excuse of toddler activities. My DH works in a very senior banking job so we're not short of cash, but his full contribution to the house is going to work. During the week he does nothing at all to help around the house, so everything else calls to me.

I still do washing, ironing, cooking, managing investments, planning hols, running the kids around to after school activities etc etc. But the cleaner has given me time to go to the gym more, to cook better meals, and most importantly she gives me the feeling that I have everything under control, and that's worth the money in my mind.

TimeForMeToF1y · 12/01/2023 06:09

Good ness, what a long post to justify a perfectly normal thing

If you can afford it why would you not?

Enjoy your time with your son and create a job for someone else, totally sensible imo

MinnieMountain · 12/01/2023 06:10

I work 3 days a week and have a child in school. Having a cleaner is brilliant.

Why wouldn’t you want them to clean your whole house? Ours won’t do the basement, which is a bit annoying.

SchrodingersKettle · 12/01/2023 06:12

Oh my goodness of course it’s not unreasonable! Having a baby is hard work… and frankly some babies are harder work than others. In the past mums would have been home full-time, may have had family nearby to help, etc.

if you can find the money id recommend it. I went back to work part time 9am til 2.30pm when my dc1 was aged 11 months and I was shattered (also had 90mins of commuting each day). Watch out, as found an expectation from dh - which I sorted out for dc2 - that my part-time hours meant I could do 90% of all the household admin and housework. I never had a moment of “me-time”.

honestly if you think it would help, do it! If you find an excellent cleaner treat them brilliantly (although I just learned on another thread mine is significantly better paid than a junior doctor 😬)

BeautifulWar · 12/01/2023 06:13

So whatever you afford to make like easier! It's worth asking yourself why you feel you need permission, though.

tickychicky · 12/01/2023 06:15

Is someone saying this is unreasonable? I think its a genius idea if you can afford it.

Hidingawaytoday · 12/01/2023 06:15

Do it! I work 4 days a week and we always said we'd get a cleaner when I went back... the only reason we haven't is that you have to tidy up before they come... 😆

BCBird · 12/01/2023 06:17

I live alone. I have a cleaner. I.reduced my hours at work this year but decided that I will.make cuts elsewhere if necessary but the cleaner stays. I don't want to.do.it.

Original poster
Cleanqueennot · 12/01/2023 06:20

TimeForMeToF1y · 12/01/2023 06:09

Good ness, what a long post to justify a perfectly normal thing

If you can afford it why would you not?

Enjoy your time with your son and create a job for someone else, totally sensible imo

Haha sorry for the long post. I just thought I would do all the explaining in case people came back and said “why don’t you just use those two days to clean?”

I guess it is just a normal thing but something I’ve never had to consider before. My mum is dead against having a cleaner!

OP posts:
Original poster
Cleanqueennot · 12/01/2023 06:25

MinnieMountain · 12/01/2023 06:10

I work 3 days a week and have a child in school. Having a cleaner is brilliant.

Why wouldn’t you want them to clean your whole house? Ours won’t do the basement, which is a bit annoying.

I wouldn’t want them in my office as I work from home and would want the cleaner to come when I’m working in there. I don’t really like the idea of someone in mine and hubbys bedroom. It’s the one room in the house that we arent too tidy with clothes etc and I wouldn’t expect the cleaner to handle our personal items. Plus I feel I would have to remember to put the lube away rather than keeping it on the bedside table hahaha. Maybe she could do a thorough clean once in a blue moon!

OP posts:
Babyenroute · 12/01/2023 06:25

YANBU. I am on mat leave and still have a cleaner every week as don't feel I would be able to while looking after baby. My husband and I would end up spending our evenings and weekends cleaning if not! Also having a baby is a messy business 😁

Original poster
Cleanqueennot · 12/01/2023 06:28

tickychicky · 12/01/2023 06:15

Is someone saying this is unreasonable? I think its a genius idea if you can afford it.

My mum would say this is unreasonable. She would say I’m mad to want another woman in my home. She thinks cleaners want to steal stuff like your money or your husband haha

OP posts:
StellaGibson2022 · 12/01/2023 06:30

Your home, your money OP - get that cleaner!!

NuffSaidSam · 12/01/2023 06:30

TimeForMeToF1y · 12/01/2023 06:09

Good ness, what a long post to justify a perfectly normal thing

If you can afford it why would you not?

Enjoy your time with your son and create a job for someone else, totally sensible imo

This.

Don't need all the justification.

If you can afford it, go for it. Create a job. Enjoy your time.

Noicant · 12/01/2023 06:31

I did, when I was pregnant I got someone in for 12 hours a week. When little one got here I bumped it up to 16 hours (lots of tiles in my home). Babies are a lot of work, I was half dead from sleep deprivation even though Dh was doing 50:50 on nights.

Families don’t have the same level of support as when we lived in tight knit communities or multi generational homes. It’s just been left to a single woman/couple to do what several people would have been helping with in the first year.

Oysterbabe · 12/01/2023 06:32

I work part time, my kids are at school and have a cleaner. Like fuck am I spending my one day off a week alone cleaning.

PurpleFlower1983 · 12/01/2023 06:38

It’s your money OP! Get the cleaner! 2-3 hours a week should be fine! Def worth it!

TimeForMeToF1y · 12/01/2023 06:39

Cleanqueennot · 12/01/2023 06:28

My mum would say this is unreasonable. She would say I’m mad to want another woman in my home. She thinks cleaners want to steal stuff like your money or your husband haha

Show quote history

You're an adult with your own child now, you don't need to do what your mum tells you, especially when she has such silly views

Why does she get a say anyway?

carlylovespies · 12/01/2023 06:43

I'd love to be part time and have a cleaner! I just can't afford it lol I am full time at the moment and so was going to get a cleaner as can't do it all. It was going to cost just shy of £200 a month (3 bed semi, 2 bathrooms!) however, as I've now decided to go part time for health reasons, I'll need to do that cleaning myself. Being able to be both part time and have a cleaner though would be amazing ha! If you can afford it just do it

ZED55JAX0 · 12/01/2023 06:46

Why would it be unreasonable!
if you can afford it then do it
im not currently working on mat leave too I have had cleaner’s for years as long as you can afford to!
have you tried a sling to do hoovering this is what I do if need to and seems to work ok for us! Maybe try it if you can

W0tnow · 12/01/2023 06:48

You don’t need anyone’s permission. I had one when I was single with no kids and had time to clean! Go for it!

Weenurse · 12/01/2023 06:49

I see it as supporting local business