To give up my teaching career to focus on family & home

[daisiesdahlias]

I used to work in retail, a couple of years ago I retrained and became a primary teacher. I love being in the classroom but it is a very stressful job and took over my life.

3 months ago I had a baby. Through family an opportunity has come up for us to own a home with some land which is our dream. I would love to be able to focus on my children and growing food, having chickens etc and this could be it. I would need to work part time for now though to afford it. So return to teaching or retail?

I feel like I need to choose - if I go back to work as a teacher even part time it totally consumes you, and I won't be able to prioritise my home in the way I've dreamed of. I'd like to focus on home and family and go back to retail to earn some money in the kind of job I don't bring home with me.

I'm worried my family will see it as a failure if I give up teaching and go back to retail. WIBU to give it up and focus on the lifestyle I want, using retail part time as supplemental income to my husband's? (Not working at all isn't an option at the moment)

Although it's our dream this isn't an opportunity we saw ever really happening, definitely not this soon, or I probably wouldn't have trained as a teacher in the first place

Teaching jobs share doing 2 days a week?

I agree with you that teaching part-time is essentially teaching full-time - the economies of scale on working hours are like no other profession. If I were you, I'd do retail part-time temporarily and then move into something more self-employed teaching-related part-time when it's established. Like running a club or clubs, childminding, tutoring etc. It means you can escalate to full-time at your leisure as your DC's grow. Alternatively, being a TA is a lot less time consuming than teaching.

You could do short term supply for odd days but you'd have to be ready for an early morning phone call. There should be planning available for you otherwise you would have to think on your feet. The work might be very irregular but would pay more per hour than retail. It's hard to advise.

Your opportunity with the house and land sounds like a fabulous opportunity which I would have jumped at. Good luck with it.

Have you thought about long term? Pension? Do you have adequate life insurance/critical illness should your DH be unable to work. Will his pension support both of you? If he’s out of work can you build enough of a cushion to cover the animal feed and costs of a small holding?

while the chickens etc sounds idyllic, have you though about the restrictions on your life? No weekends away, no long days out, no holidays, without having to sort someone to come in and attend to the animals. Does your husband feel the same? If you are ill, will he take on all the house and animal care?

even with part time work how will you arrange that around animals? Bear in mind land is expensive, fences to fix, vets, feed, medication…

it’s pretty brutal in winter as well having to get up and make sure water supplies haven’t frozen, chickens are fed and let out, while trying to get a toddler up and ready for school..

have you had land before?

You need to think more long term, what about your pension?

You'd absolutely not be a failure for reassessing your work/homelife situation!
Personally, I might first explore other avenues 'in between' such as doing supply or tutoring. This way, you keep your foot in the door and are presumably paid more than in retail (?).

It's not a failure to decide a job isn't for you. And this does sound like an exciting opportunity!
However, I would say that teaching is at its most intense in the first years and does get easier/you get quicker the longer you do it so the all consuming feeling doesn't last forever. Although I'm not in England and people do seem to complain a lot more about the job there so I could be wrong! Also I don't think part time is "all consuming" as teaching 2 days a week is really quite different to 5!!

@daisiesdahlias - did you make a decision? Xxx

Is it one or the other? What about supply teaching? Tutoring? Early years? Early help? Family support? Library work?

It depends how much you need to survive comfortably. If you can afford to live comfortably working in retail then I would. I agree that teaching is all consuming, everyone I know who teaches that has a family feels constant guilt at the relentless hours. Unless you do supply, that’s quite fun and might pay better than retail.

I'm.a secondary teacher. I had been teaching for 19 years before having my daughter. I went down to 3 days and it works well- daughter is now 3. I don't know if I've been teaching so long I know what to say no to and manage my workload so it doesn't massively impact my family (I'm HoD).or that I work in a school that genuinely cares about their staff and isn't toxic- even though we're currently rated inadequate so always lots to be working on..

Maybe try a different school? And also think about your financial independence- will husband pay into a pension for you that is as good as the TPS? Etc

You aren't a failure for deciding you want to try something different and take a leap of faith, that's actually really brave. I found having children made me reassess my priorities massively.
Obviously it's high stakes so I'm sure you'll look at finances and have a plan B etc.
Good luck!

I'm a teacher with a family and I intend to keep my job til retirement even if it's part time. Always good to be prepared for the worst.

Can you tutor privately?

Remove your family’s reaction to the situation and what would you do?