It has come to my attention that an aunt of mine won't be attending my sons first birthday, even though she really wanted to because of other people invited.
for context, my fathers birthday was last month and there was a lot of chaos, but in short, one of my cousins disrespected my MIL, so i've chosen she'll not be invited. My aunt however, just found out my MIL a family friend (who was also present at my fathers birthday) will also be attending, and she said "were it just your MIL i would stomach it and attend, since afterall it's her grandsons birthday, first birthday, but your MIL and this woman outspokenly called my two children "fat" and made jokes at the table" and supposedly this was confirmed by two other people. I didn't know about any of this.
I'm tempted to cancel the entirety of my sons birthday, but it's his first one, or i'm going to have to deal with not having people attend. on one side i have my aunt, whom i dearly adore, and on the other side is this family friend who adores my son and has been so present during his first year, checking in constantly, buying him gifts and generally being a great friend throughout this.
Do i speak up about what has happened and cut strings attached? Or is it not my place? It has broken my heart to not have my cousin attend my sons birthday, and now i've heard this news and all in all, im in a bit of a state to even think clearly.
what would you do?