What is the best way to deal with friend who has hypochondria?

[ADHDPI]

I have a lovely friend who makes me very happy to be around and also drives me completely nuts at the same time. Every single time I see her she has something else wrong with her. Banged her head on a cupboard = concussion. Sore throat = must be strep a. Very mild and much improved cough after having a chest infection = wants referral to hospital as NHS guidance says seek advice for a cough if it lasts for 3 weeks. She genuinely believes these things and is often in years, and whilst I try to be sympathetic to her genuine angst, I simultaneously am screaming inside and waiting for her to finish so I can move the conversation on. Am I being harsh or does anyone else feel like this? I don't want to lose her as a friend as I gain so much from our relationship but her health anxiety is getting worse and I am going nuts. Her partner has raised it with her and so has her whole family and she just gets irritated and thinks they aren't taking her seriously. There's no point in me also raising it. What's the best way to deal with this so our friendship doesn't entirely fall apart?

Ignore it and change subject? My grandma was like that .. we kinda got bored and ignored it.

has this behaviour always been like this even before lockdown?

Sounds like health anxiety

And remind her to stop dr Googling. DD does that and also dr tik tok 🥸

I have a friend who does this. I know more about her menopause than my own. If you dare to disagree she will start diagnosing you with something. I feel your pain.

Yes but has got worse post covid.

I suffer from health anxiety, it really isn't pleasant. And i know I often sound like a stuck record but can not help myself when I'm genuinely panicking and want and need reassuring. Has she had any help? CBT? perhaps asking her about seeking help for her anxiety might help?

I'm not opening that can of worms. Maybe I should but it hasn't gone well when other people have and I really just can't be arsed. Selfish maybe but I don't have the energy.

To be honest you're saying you cba to deal with it, so seems like the friendship may fall apart anyways !

Probably. I don't want it to. But can't believe something that doesn't really affect me that much drives me so up the wall. Possibly because I have a lot of health issues I never talk about unless I need to. It's just exhausting. Not sure what I expect people to say. Maybe one of those situations where I needed to rant.

Perhaps highlight to her how much your friendship means to you but feel it is unhealthy she has this obsession and ask her to look at things more positively/practically. And something along the lines of if you really feel
you are sick or something, go talk to the docs/111 to get her concerns over and done with and move on. She will probably embarrass herself along the way but hopefully it reduces all this.

And then switch the topic. It’s painful. When some people end up talking about the same thing all the time (sickness or whatever obsession), I think it’s an unfortunate response you do end up distancing yourself from it.

Good on you for caring and asking for a way to work on this friendship

Oh I feel you, OP- I’d have very little patience for this attention seeking behaviour.
my friend has health anxiety and it doesn’t present like this at all. Your friend sounds like an absolute drama Queen. YANBU.

I was friends at school with a girl like this. Had everything under the sun (but not really) despite being actually fit and healthy.
I remember hearing a crash in our GCSE maths exam and invigilators moving fast and I knew without looking that she had 'fainted'. She did it several times as a teenager but always made very quick recoveries.

We're still friends on FB now and she is still, always ill. Always praising her husband for keeping everything going for her and her children. She just seems to read and drink coffee from her pictures - I'm not being mean, it's never a serious illness but if there's a bug to catch, she will have it so seriously it involves 3 week bed rests etc.

I couldn't be close with her at all anymore, it would drive me potty. And yes endless people comment, oh me too hun, poor you! I end up thinking, is just it me??

YANBU.