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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

4yr old eating in the car

153 replies

itsturtlesallthewaydown · 06/01/2023 10:10

I'm wondering if MN can help resolve a debate I have with my DH.

I think it's a choking risk for a 4yr old to eat whilst driving and so they should never be given food in a car. If they want a snack you should stop at a service station. My DH says it's OK to give them food whilst driving.

What does everyone else think?

YABU: It's ok for children to eat in a car.
YANBU: It's a choking risk and children should never eat in a car.

OP posts:
PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 06/01/2023 10:11

Why are they more likely to choke in a car than in a service station?

IglesiasPiggl · 06/01/2023 10:12

As long as it's not the usual choking suspects eg grapes, then it's fine.

Original poster
itsturtlesallthewaydown · 06/01/2023 10:14

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 06/01/2023 10:11

Why are they more likely to choke in a car than in a service station?

It's more the extra time it would take to stop the car, get them out the car seat and slap their back or whatever

OP posts:
Original poster
itsturtlesallthewaydown · 06/01/2023 10:15

e.g. saferide4kids.com/blog/dont-eat-and-drive-kids-eating-that-is/

OP posts:
PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 06/01/2023 10:16

@itsturtlesallthewaydown but when was the last time your 4 year old choked on food and you had to slap their back? Yes, it could happen, but it’s vanishingly unlikely.

Praying4Memory · 06/01/2023 10:18

Risk isn't just about the risk of doing something vs not doing it - it's against what the alternative is.

If you have a hungry cranky child screaming away in the back seat that's a much bigger risk of crashing due to distraction vs a small delay reaching a child in the tiny chance they start to choke.

elenacampana · 06/01/2023 10:21

4 year olds can eat unsupervised. I used to go downstairs and amuse myself when I was 4 and my parents were still in bed, 4 year olds aren’t babies.

Ponoka7 · 06/01/2023 10:22

The child is getting out if the age of being a big choking risk. As said, just pick your food. I thought that this was going to be about the mess. Is he picking up a MacDonald's etc?

FlounderingFruitcake · 06/01/2023 10:23

I let mine eat. Not obvious choking hazards like whole grapes but something like a yoghurt pouch or a packet of pom bears Your way is probably tidier though. No chance of finding month old McDonald’s chips in the crevices of the car seat!

HiccupHorrendousHaddock · 06/01/2023 10:23

I think you’re being over the top, OP. 4 year olds are perfectly capable of eating without choking.

FluffMagnet · 06/01/2023 10:24

My 4 Yr old started choking the other day as I lifted her into her car seat. I thought she'd finished her food, she hadn't. Thankfully it was right in front of me so I could see her struggles. Choking is a silent killer, and a friend in nursing has always warned me against it after a number of tragic cases.

Squeakybits · 06/01/2023 10:24

I think you could compromise here. So food in the car could be fruit pouches/yogurt pouches, baby fast melt crisps, chocolate chips. Things that a 4yr old is less likely to choke on.

SummerInSun · 06/01/2023 10:24

Praying4Memory · 06/01/2023 10:18

Risk isn't just about the risk of doing something vs not doing it - it's against what the alternative is.

If you have a hungry cranky child screaming away in the back seat that's a much bigger risk of crashing due to distraction vs a small delay reaching a child in the tiny chance they start to choke.

This.

Ponoka7 · 06/01/2023 10:25

That article is about toddlers, who you'd give things like soft wotsits. Four year olds aren't toddlers. Are you struggling with your child growing up?

Oblomov22 · 06/01/2023 10:26

OTT

inappropriateraspberry · 06/01/2023 10:26

My 4 year old eats in the car all the ti E after swimming lessons etc. They're hungry and tired.
Why is it more dangerous in a car? How likely are they to choke anywhere? It's not likely, and my child has no issues with their eating.
I think you are OTT, the only downside to eating in a car is the mess!

WandaWonder · 06/01/2023 10:26

We rarely fed in the car due to mess but I don't understand why choking would happen more?

jannier · 06/01/2023 10:27

When you choke there is no noise it's silent....no coughing or gagging....so if child is in back seat you won't see or know they can't raise your attention so the first you would know is when you stop which could be too late. Normally you eat together where you can see what's going on....another risk of are snack all day long culture....your child could choke at home if you allow them to run around eating and they go out of sight
You can choke on any food but some are more risky

jannier · 06/01/2023 10:29

When your driving risk also increases because of bumpy roads and breaking ....adults can choke too not just children. But they are not restrained in a child seat so can generally reach you.

FlounderingFruitcake · 06/01/2023 10:30

That article is strange. Firstly it lumps all under 5s in together, when a 6 month old obviously isn’t comparable with a 4YO. Then it talks about choking and car accidents in the same paragraph like there’s a proven connection between the 2 even though there isn’t. And as for the common culprits of choking, who the hell would give their kids bones at all but especially whilst they’re strapped into a car seat! Nothing in it suggests that a 4YO is at risk of choking on wotsits!

jannier · 06/01/2023 10:32

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 06/01/2023 10:11

Why are they more likely to choke in a car than in a service station?

What do you think the signs of choking are? Do you think they make a noise? How are you going to know they are choking they can't even reach you won't fall over because they are restrained....you may well glance in your mirror but would you know if they are asleep or unconscious in your quick glance?

Aintnosupermum · 06/01/2023 10:34

I've never let my children eat in the car. It’s not only a choke hazard but messy. I was 16 and eating in the car when a sudden acceleration resulted in the food getting stuck. It was silent and I was whacking my sister in the passenger seat who was dutifully ignoring me. When my father turned around he somehow managed to whack my back and the food came out.

Children don’t need to eat all day and this snacking isn’t healthy for them.

Original poster
itsturtlesallthewaydown · 06/01/2023 10:34

Ponoka7 · 06/01/2023 10:25

That article is about toddlers, who you'd give things like soft wotsits. Four year olds aren't toddlers. Are you struggling with your child growing up?

Not at all, but choking is one of the leading causes of death for children under 5, and it's just trying to minimise that risk.

OP posts:
MajorCarolDanvers · 06/01/2023 10:37

The risk of mess and crumbs is far higher but I still let mine eat.

jannier · 06/01/2023 10:37

Child seats are reclined restricting the throat we should all sit upright at a 90 degree angle when eating or drinking ...children are also at risk from inhaling drinks and dry drowning.