School let my DS6 out without me there

Januaryblues01 · 2023-01-05T16:21:27+00:00

Well i know I'm not being unreasonable but I'm just so angry. I think this is the last straw with this school. The head is so casual about other issues we have had and acts like he is untouchable. Thankfully one of my friends was there with DS but no one noticed or called my DS back in until I got there. Major safeguarding breach. I emailed the head 24 hours ago. I've had no acknowledgement of email or anything

BigSandyBalls2015 · 05/01/2023 16:24

Was it the head on the door or his teacher?

ModeWeasel · 05/01/2023 16:24

I would report this to the safeguarding governor (or chair of governors if no one specifically focused on this).

WheresTheCakeThen · 05/01/2023 16:34

Let him leave the classroom or let him leave the school site completely? Neither is great, but the first is less serious and requires a different response. Eg at my DC 's school There is a teacher or TA at each classroom door and then 2 more on the gate to check no child is leaving the school grounds without an adult. I can see how the teacher might be distracted talking to another parent, and the child runs past them but won't get past the 2 adults on the gate (who aren't really known to the parents don't get talking to them).

You are right to expect a response but be specific and realistic about what you expect - eg a review of Going Home procedures to ensure that your situation is unlikely to happen again.

Original poster

Januaryblues01 · 05/01/2023 16:38

WheresTheCakeThen · 05/01/2023 16:34

Let him leave the classroom or let him leave the school site completely? Neither is great, but the first is less serious and requires a different response. Eg at my DC 's school There is a teacher or TA at each classroom door and then 2 more on the gate to check no child is leaving the school grounds without an adult. I can see how the teacher might be distracted talking to another parent, and the child runs past them but won't get past the 2 adults on the gate (who aren't really known to the parents don't get talking to them).

You are right to expect a response but be specific and realistic about what you expect - eg a review of Going Home procedures to ensure that your situation is unlikely to happen again.

There's suppose to be a teacher on each classroom door. Apparently my DS walked out and there was no teacher on the door. There are no teachers on the gates to the road either. So once he leaves the classroom door he steps past the main gate to the road. So he was left unattended to exit the school alone.

I did ask in my email how the head would unsure this would not happen again.

OP posts:

ConsuelaHammock · 05/01/2023 16:46

Did he not know to wait for you? Were you late?

NewHopeNow · 05/01/2023 16:49

Why have you just emailed and left it? Why haven't you made immediate, direct contact? I can't understand that.

girlmom21 · 05/01/2023 16:54

Have you spoken to the class teacher? Have you spoke to DS about waiting until you collect him? Why weren't you there?

RayRai · 05/01/2023 16:57

ConsuelaHammock · 05/01/2023 16:46

Did he not know to wait for you? Were you late?

Surely for a 6 year old this is not really relevant? He shouldn't have been let out until a parent was there.

girlmom21 · 05/01/2023 16:59

@RayRai if he walked out with a friend to one of OP's friends for all the teacher knows she was collecting him that day. The teacher could have been distracted by an emergency or another parent. We have no information

JanusTheFirst · 05/01/2023 17:18

If you are usually there it may have been a careless expectation.

To avoid it happening again be there on time.

MargaretThursday · 05/01/2023 17:18

I'd expect a 6yo to have enough common sense to think "oh, mum isn't here. I better go back to teacher."

Round here they're let out of school from year 3 to go where ever they think they're meant to go. Very few parents wait at the gate, most parents wait 5-10 minutes walk away. Yes, this is in England.

Starlightstarbright1 · 05/01/2023 17:21

Why were you late ?

Why didn't you address this at the time ?

toocold54 · 05/01/2023 17:32

There's suppose to be a teacher on each classroom door. Apparently my DS walked out and there was no teacher on the door.

I voted YANBU as I thought you meant the teacher let him out without checking you were there first.

But if there was no teacher letting them out then it sounds like your DS decided to just walk out making him the one in the wrong.

I would clarify what happened before blaming the teacher for your DS’s wrong doing.

TeenDivided · 05/01/2023 17:40

I agree this is serious.

At that age they should not let your DS out until they have identified the adult collecting him.
What I would expect is a) an apology and b) confirmation that all staff and children will be reminded about the procedure.

What did you do at the time? ie When you got there.
Did you talk to the adult at the door / go to the office? Or were you too late?
Have you talked to your DS? At 6 he should understand not to leave until he sees you.

LongingToBeByTheSea · 05/01/2023 18:26

"Round here they're let out of school from year 3 to go where ever they think they're meant to go. Very few parents wait at the gate, most parents wait 5-10 minutes walk away. Yes, this is in England."

Same at our school.

donttellmehesalive · 05/01/2023 18:33

I'd have spoken to the teacher first I think. It is possible she was dealing with an emergency. Or that she told him not to leave but he slipped away while her back was turned to talk to another child or parent.

At my child's school, at that age, they are released with the bell and told to wait by the door of their parent isn't there. Some children walk to a sibling's classroom for collection or meet parents at an agreed spot.

thingumybob · 05/01/2023 18:42

It is irrelevant if other schools let children out alone in year 3. A 6 year old would be in year 1 or 2. Also this school does not do that so there is no expectation or plan for the child to be out unaccompanied.

When something similar happened at the school where I worked it was taken very seriously.

It is no good blaming the 6 year old. Yes, the child obviously should have known better and needs speaking to but children do stupid things. That's why there should be procedures in place to keep them safe.

OP look on the school website for the complaints process and follow that for how to escalate.

donttellmehesalive · 05/01/2023 18:45

thingumybob · 05/01/2023 18:42

It is irrelevant if other schools let children out alone in year 3. A 6 year old would be in year 1 or 2. Also this school does not do that so there is no expectation or plan for the child to be out unaccompanied.

When something similar happened at the school where I worked it was taken very seriously.

It is no good blaming the 6 year old. Yes, the child obviously should have known better and needs speaking to but children do stupid things. That's why there should be procedures in place to keep them safe.

OP look on the school website for the complaints process and follow that for how to escalate.

I would still speak to the teacher first to avoid feeling like a dick if, say, another child had just vomited or had an asthma attack and she'd asked everyone to wait while she got another member of staff. You might still end up complaining, but at least get the full picture.