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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Damage to property

98 replies

Notyetacatlady · 03/01/2023 14:33

Hi all,

With the cost of living as it is not everyone has saving so if a loved on accidentally damaged a neighbour or friends property and you couldn’t afford to fix it what would you do.
Insurance is an option but would mean already high premiums would sky rocket.
Feeling pretty on edge right now. Just received from a breakdown so don’t need this on top.
Owner of damage will not accept a payment plan.

OP posts:
Berthatydfil · 03/01/2023 14:58

What insurance would the op have? Genuine q
Im not aware of any insurance that covers you or your children from accidentally damaging other peoples property in person.

Lochroy · 03/01/2023 14:58

If it's their car, they need to contact their insurance and let them deal with it/contact you if they want to. Sorry, I was under the wrong impression of what had happened from the OP when you mentioned insurance an option.

MeMyBooksAndMyCats · 03/01/2023 14:58

Just tell them you can't afford it and they'll have to claim on their insurance.

Why was they parked on your boundary? Did they block access to the pavement for your disabled dc?

Original poster
Notyetacatlady · 03/01/2023 14:59

No they were not in my land but they park next to it

OP posts:
Original poster
Notyetacatlady · 03/01/2023 15:01

Our drives are next to each other my dc was on our land but damaged their car that was parked close

OP posts:
helpfulperson · 03/01/2023 15:02

It would be their car insurance that needed claimed on by them. You could offer to contribute to the excess but the level of excess is a choice of the person insuring the car so you have no obligation to.

caringcarer · 03/01/2023 15:02

If your disabled child caused damage to their car parked on their own properly then you have to pay to get it fixed. Use the child's DLA or ring your household insurance to check if you are covered. Your neighbour should not be out of pocket through any actions of your child.

MeMyBooksAndMyCats · 03/01/2023 15:06

But the child was on their own property.

How bad is the damage?

Zombiemum1946 · 03/01/2023 15:07

Are they actually insured ? Is there a history of problems meaning it's difficult to claim ? Could it be that they've got a high excess eg £250 on their insurance and that's why they don't want to claim ? Either way they have to notify their insurance. The company can try to recover costs from you. The company would likely accept a payment plan. You can't give them what you haven't got.

Chickenly · 03/01/2023 15:08

MeMyBooksAndMyCats · 03/01/2023 15:06

But the child was on their own property.

How bad is the damage?

I'm assuming (perhaps incorrectly) that it'll be something like two adjacent driveways with each car on their own property. OP's DC opened the car door on OP's car and it hit and damaged the NDN's car. The OP and her DC never went onto the NDN's property (the car door did).

Ohjustboreoff · 03/01/2023 15:17

@Notyetacatlady how old is your DC as the age of criminal responsibility is 10 years of age, so if accidental then I'd say to them you're not paying as you didn't cause the damage. I don't think they'll go after a child in small claims court!

Original poster
Notyetacatlady · 03/01/2023 15:17

It’s a tricky situation

OP posts:
Original poster
Notyetacatlady · 03/01/2023 15:19

My child is under 10 and needs room as we have blue badge etc which makes it no one’s fault but upsetting non the less.
My dc is not at fault here because they fell

OP posts:
Original poster
Notyetacatlady · 03/01/2023 15:20

We normally have a good relationship with our neighbour

OP posts:
Butitsnotfunnyisititsserious · 03/01/2023 15:23

Notyetacatlady · 03/01/2023 15:17

It’s a tricky situation

If your child falling caused the damage, why should the neighbour be out of pocket?

Lochroy · 03/01/2023 15:24

@Notyetacatlady When you said insurance was an option in your OP, what insurance did you mean?

If you don't have the money, you can't pay what you can't pay. All you do is apologise, reiterate your offer of a payment plan or explain you are happy to have your details passed on to their car insurers.

Chickenly · 03/01/2023 15:25

Ohjustboreoff · 03/01/2023 15:17

@Notyetacatlady how old is your DC as the age of criminal responsibility is 10 years of age, so if accidental then I'd say to them you're not paying as you didn't cause the damage. I don't think they'll go after a child in small claims court!

This has absolutely nothing at all to do with the age of criminal responsibility. No one committed any crime.

BluIsTheColour · 03/01/2023 15:26

I don't think you would have to pay anything. It was an accident, an individual does not carry insurance for this type of thing but their car does. They claim their insurance and I would offer to pay the excess (I'd want proof) as they might rip the piss tell u it's hundreds of pounds when it is less.

What insurance cld u claim? U cldnt claim ur car insurance as ur car was not involved and not even the policy holder 🤷🏻‍♀️

GinoVino · 03/01/2023 15:28

What is the damage?

Brefugee · 03/01/2023 15:29

Not paying when you’ve caused harm to someone else when you could (even if it costs you down the line) is immoral.

i agree with this, and you run the risk of them suing you anyway.
I grew up in Germany and am still here where it is absolutely normal for everyone to have 3rd party insurance for this - it includes your kids and so on.

So, for eg, when i was out with DD and her friends and one of them opened my car door a bit too quickly and dented the car next to us, we called her parents and they sorted it out with the chap with minimum fuss. It is brilliant, and if you have a pet, or children, worth its weight in gold.

saltinesandcoffeecups · 03/01/2023 15:35

You sound a bit blasé about this OP. While I can empathize with your situation that doesn’t make you any less responsible.

Your payment plan option is a joke… do car repair places take payment options? Not likely. Yes the neighbor should report to their insurance, and the will likely have a rate increase because of it. I can understand why that’s not an attractive option to them.

I also find it a little distasteful that you keep mentioning that your child is disabled. Does this cause you to believe that you are less responsible for damage they cause?

Reugny · 03/01/2023 15:35

If you are the other vehicle's owner and just parked up before your kid got out of the car, then you need to claim on your insurance if you don't have the money.

Depending on exactly how old the other person's car is and the model they risk being given the money and their car scrapped.

I was told by my garage when driving bangers to never bother with scratches and scraps.

Reugny · 03/01/2023 15:36

saltinesandcoffeecups · 03/01/2023 15:35

You sound a bit blasé about this OP. While I can empathize with your situation that doesn’t make you any less responsible.

Your payment plan option is a joke… do car repair places take payment options? Not likely. Yes the neighbor should report to their insurance, and the will likely have a rate increase because of it. I can understand why that’s not an attractive option to them.

I also find it a little distasteful that you keep mentioning that your child is disabled. Does this cause you to believe that you are less responsible for damage they cause?

The OP doesn't realise as the driver of the car she is responsible for some of the actions of minors in her car, especially if she is the only adult.

MatildaJayne · 03/01/2023 15:39

I don’t think the OP or her DC were in a car, though?

saltinesandcoffeecups · 03/01/2023 15:40

Brefugee · 03/01/2023 15:29

Not paying when you’ve caused harm to someone else when you could (even if it costs you down the line) is immoral.

i agree with this, and you run the risk of them suing you anyway.
I grew up in Germany and am still here where it is absolutely normal for everyone to have 3rd party insurance for this - it includes your kids and so on.

So, for eg, when i was out with DD and her friends and one of them opened my car door a bit too quickly and dented the car next to us, we called her parents and they sorted it out with the chap with minimum fuss. It is brilliant, and if you have a pet, or children, worth its weight in gold.

This.. in the US it’s called an umbrella policy. Basically it can be extra coverage for car insurance, homeowners insurance, or just general liability. We got it when we got a dog and after realizing that an accidental death from a car accident can routinely exceed the car insurance coverage. I think we pay about $200 per year for a $2M policy.