To think about leaving my 'dream job'?

[AppelationStation]

Just before covid I went back to uni. 3 years later and, as the pandemic lessened, I graduated with a strong 1st at 35. I left school at 16 with nownt. I walked straight out of uni and into what seemed the perfect job.

And it has been great. Challenging, loads of great experience, done loads for my confidence, chimes with my values (mostly). BUT...

It's a lonely job (a start up). I have a HUGE amount of responsibility (vulnerable people, grant money) and no one to share the responsibility with. This is set to change this year, but I will retain all the non-technical responsibility. All the nuts and bolts stuff. I've used my degree and specialism thus far, but when the start up is just running rather than starting, I'll basically be a general manager. I feel a bit like I'll be everyone's mum, with all the important but largely uncelebrated responsibilities that brings. Don't get me wrong, those roles are mega important. But I fulfil this role in many other areas of my life. Don't fancy being everyones mum at work!

I'll also be as high as I can ever get in this new organisation. And the sensible next step would be a similar role in a bigger organisation. That would mean more cash (our sector isn't well paid) but also relinquishing my specialism.

I'm thinking of jumping ship. I've set everything up, written and delivered strategy and plans, had some major wins, worked my ass of for 7 months at some cost to my family and my mental and physical health. It will be almost a year by the time I get another role and serve my notice.

I don't want to leave them in the lurch, or look flakey. But I also don't want to lose my specialism (I'd worked in this sector for 15 yrs before getting my degree) and become a general senior manager type forever and get trapped in that world. I don't think it would make me happy. I like projects and getting deep into doing one thing well, not sorting out lots of different stuff so everyone else can do that. My degree subject lends itself to going in that direction.

I will never be a technical specialist in this field (it combines with my own, but is quite specific in it's own right with a strong identity and quite cliquey). I am good at my job because I have a different perspective. I don't know if I want to be the only person to hold that perspective in the organisation as it becomes more business as usual.

I notice there are lots of career type threads on here tonight. I guess it's that time of year. AIBU? Genuinely appreciate (thoughtful) feedback.

Where do you want to go?

By all means leave but you need to arrive somewhere else - start focusing more on the destination and you’ll know if you want to go there.

I can only offer a general opinion but no, you're not being unreasonable. You've busted your gut to get a start up off the ground and it's heading into being a proper organisation now.. that's when loads of people leave startups, whatever the sector. I've worked for them and have seen first hand that as soon as a startup in the tech industry goes public, loads of people leave because the challenge and interest isn't there anymore (the share options help of course!).

Do what's best for you and your career, you've achieved what you can there so see what's out there.

I would probably try and carve out a role that you'll enjoy at your current place of work. If they value you enough they should be open to offering you an alternative role. I think you'll have more power to sway them somewhere where you're already known and valued than you will at a new place. Also, I think it would look better on your CV to have been there a little longer, achieved more, climbed up/worked in a different role etc. before moving on.

That said, it's always good to keep on eye on job ads and see if anything better comes up!

Thanks all - sage advice.

I have cast my eye about and there are quite a lot of jobs going in my area atm. I've seen one in particular that (on paper at least) looks great. More narrow and specialist in its requirements and would give me good experience to go in the direction I want to go (user engagement, service design, overtly anti poverty). The money is not far off what I'm on now, but I'd have somewhere to go and a career in my field ahead of me, rather than topping out in the next 6 months and becoming a generic 'operational manager' type.

My current organisation is so small there isn't room to carve out roles. And any role the board create, I have to find funding for.

I've been massively good value for this phase, but as I'm never going to get any more career development in the direction I want to go, it might be in their long term interest for me to move on now. Sticking around will give them some consistency but just kick the can down the road.

Writing this and reading it bavk has been really useful (good ild Mumsnet). I plan to cast my net but be really chosey about what i apply for and in the meantime maintain my commitment to getting this very valueable project in the best place it can be. That feels like a good balance.

Solidarity with all the people reevaluation their career choices and work life balance after a tricky (understatement!) year or so. ✊️