What did our mums used to do?

[CantFindTheBeat]

I'm 55

I spend so much of my down time titting around on MN.

I have a great job. Great friends.
But i waste so much time on social media and probably trying to distract myself from reality when I should be doing something productive.

I remember my mum cooking, reading and working but never wasting time.

What do you remember? MN and the like are surely pleasure and curse in equal measure?

No washing machine, TV, fridge, dryer, car; FT time job and 2 children, reading, visiting sisters, mending, knitting ( while talking), attending to coal fire for cooking - not a moment of idleness. For much of her 20/30s she was the only one in family of 6 with a job so kept widowed father, 2 sisters, brother, even brother in law for a while.

Her mother had 10 surviving children, a FT job looking after shop + going round factories to buy leather, cooked food, baked, sewed clothes, no washing machine, fridge, dryer, cooker. Helped by daughters when they came home from work . (They started work in factories at 13.) Visited family, delivered neighbours' babies, nursed sickly children. My grandfather's rule was, no one ate unless his wife sat down and ate. ( He knew only too well that she would claim not to be hungry otherwise.) Very tough times.

My Mum fucked the neighbours too, but that was on the orders of my Dad who had some kind of swinging network setup going on in our village that was clearly coercive of all the women involved.

When not doing that she read whilst eating Mintolas, did a bit of marking - which she sometimes got me to do for her (she was a Primary School teacher) and yes to the constantly in the neighbour's house gossiping or on the phone to her sister.

My mum worked 9 to 5 and after her divorce when I was 10 spent 4 nights a week in the local pub with her friends!

Daytime TV and adult education classes such as figure drawing, French, creative writing, positive living and astrology.

My mum, on her death bed, admitted that she used to spend hours on my computer, playing games. She used to get the hoover out just before we got home from school, so she'd look like she'd been busy.

She only allowed me and my brother an hour a day on the computer, the bloody hypocrite!

My mum watched telly and played sudoko. My grandmothers watched telly and a) did crosswords or b) fiddled with premade craft kits.

I think "wasting time" during your down time is normal and healthy. You don't have to be productive a during every moment of the day.

That made me laugh!!

Smoked and read tons of mills and boons (you could always tell when she got to the good bits as she smirked)

She reads and watches telly more than I do.

I justify internet etc as I am watching Youtube and 'reading' stuff so it's the same difference really.

But I do want to go out more into the real world and meet/chat to people that way.

She's always been quite into political groups and stuff but I wouldn't want to do that anyway, but I might try to go to more religious stuff.

At 55 mum still worked part time. House always spotless. She took up French and became very good at it. She read a lot.

I must admit I have always wondered what my mum spent her time doing. She didn’t work, so once we were at school, the day was hers. She was a major Neighbours addict, I remember that, lol.

Worked
I used to come home from primary school to an empty house and do the tidying and prep the veg for tea.

She worked long hours as a seamstress or a barmaid or a burler & mender so she wasn't home until after we got home from school.

She'd peel potatoes with a knife, chip them into her hand and then drop them into a big pan of water whilst watching the soaps. This was until her husband took over that duty because she "hacked them to death" and were too small.

She used to drink lager, but because she was posh lol she would pour it from the can into a glass, tipping it so it didn't fizz over. She was also a chain smoker.

Read
Cross stitch
Ferried me around to my sports club 5/6 times a week and whilst waiting there wouls chat, read or cross stitch
Did ladies Circle which involved a lot of fundraising and nights out

My mum definitely spent more time cleaning and after that reading and watching tv. I envy those times in one way, in another I think it must have been isolating as you see other people on eg fb talking about stuff similar to what you’re going through etc

My mum was (and still is) very houseproud- her home is immaculate! Mine is not. She always worked full time when I was a kid as did my Dad but used to be doing jobs til 10/11 at night. I remember lying in bed at 10pm whilst she was still putting new wallpaper up in my room. To be fair there was not much to do in the 80's - no internet (except for total geeks) She still likes to be busy all the time and is at nearly 80 yrs old aghast at my slatternly ways! Seems it is a sin to enjoy a lie in or a lazy day!

Well yeah, she worked of course, she had to go back to full time because my dad decided not to work and let her pay the mortgage and support us all. Maybe if she'd had something like MN she would've felt able to leave her marriage earlier.

Knitting. Daily obsessive cleaning. Ironing. Cooking (her husband didn't cook a single meal in 40 years).

Get us up in the morning, tell us to get dressed in front of the open oven door as she was using it as a heater. No time for breakfast tell us to buy a kit Kat on the way to school and shove us out of the door.
she would then sit watch television and smoke.

Everything was done in time to be able to watch two lots of news in the evening.

In our house we don’t eat until 7pm + which my oldies found hard to adapt to when visiting.

Mine used to go the local shops everyday for ingredients for that evenings meal. Never bought a few days worth at a time. Crazy bird. She baked a lot, and always had a knitting project on the go. A few nights a week she went to bingo, and was also in a local ladies darts team.

Pre-internet, my mum smoked and drank endless cups of tea while watching her soaps. Then spent hours sitting on the stairs talking on the phone. Then, when the internet happened, she spent hours in chatrooms catfishing men, and playing "find the hidden items" games.

Irish Catholic mother
Reading, baking, gardening, night classes, playing with 5 children, saying the Rosary..

My mother used to knit in front of the TV each evening. When we came home from school, we turned on the TV.

I don't really watch TV in the evenings, so I guess that's what I do instead of watching evening TV.

Watching tv or going out to play darts