Partner still here

[GooseberryCinnamonYogurt]

Partner of one year, stays at mine for a few days, then goes home so we both do our own thing for couple days, then we back get together again. Usually works ok. But he's still here after having come over a few days before Xmas. How do I kindly say go home please I need my space?

Ask him what his plans are?

"So what time are you heading off today?"

"I'm about to start bleeding explosively from my nether regions and nobody wants to see that, can you piss off before the sobbing and mainlining chocolate starts?"

Most men run away from that.

If you've been together for a year, you should be able tell him straight and, if he doesn't understand, then...

"When are you planning on heading off? Been lovely having you here but I could do with a couple of days to get straight before I go back to work."

I hope he pulls his weight and contributes to the costs when he stays if it's always him coming to you...

"Go home please. I need my space."

He maybe thought you were both intending to spend all of Christmas and New Year together.

I think I'd have "plans" for tomorrow evening e.g. "I'm meeting up with my mum/sister/friend/dog for dinner tomorrow night, but shall I come over to yours/do you fancy coming over at the weekend?"

That way it's clear your plans for tomorrow don't include him, but not as blunt as 'when are you going home?"

If its been a year you should be able to tell him to leave.

He's left - had a light hearted chat about needing my space and all the things that needed doing. I know he doesn't understand that I like my own company at times. It just shows me we're not at the moving in together stage yet, and I'm not even sure I'll get to that stage.

Think very hard before you even mention moving i together .

Done it about 15 months ago and i'm really struggling with it the last few months , I much prefer my own company 90% of the time

Wonnle - interesting to read what you say. My gut is saying don't commit further and it would be so easy to fall into a living together situation. But so much harder to untangle one.