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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

4yo terrified of fireworks.

14 replies

GuinnessLover · 31/12/2022 18:42

Son is terrified of them. He's 4. He hides under his bed sobbing and shaking when they're going off and I have to go and get him and put him in my bed and lay with him until they've stopped. I've tried everything and thought I had some good techniques down to help him but they've just started and he's now in the bath crying with his ears under the water so he can't hear them. I'm at a loss. Does anyone have any tips?

OP posts:

Rainallnight · 31/12/2022 18:43

Too late for tonight but ear defenders.

Original poster

GuinnessLover · 31/12/2022 18:43

I've tried ear defenders but he takes them off and throws them across the room because he 'can't hear when the fireworks are coming'.

OP posts:

PAFMO · 31/12/2022 18:43

Not really, but sympathies. I was like that as a child. I did grow out of it obviously, but still hate the fuckers now, waste of money and scaring animals and kids. I'd ban all but silent ones.

Original poster

GuinnessLover · 31/12/2022 18:44

Rainallnight · 31/12/2022 18:43

Too late for tonight but ear defenders.

Cross posted. I have tried so hard to get him to wear them but he hates them and says he can't hear when the fireworks are coming. I'm not sure what he means by this but he almost seems more scared when he's wearing them.

OP posts:

Boxofsockss · 31/12/2022 18:44

Poor lad. Have you got a White noise machine? This can help. Also some good windows! I recently had new windows and couldn’t believe the difference in terms of blocking noise out. I appreciate this is a massive cost however for the issue. Hope he is ok tonight !

girlmom21 · 31/12/2022 18:45

I'd put some music on and have a disco at home. Let him burn himself out and crash if you need to.

But there's nothing wrong with cuddling in bed until they have stopped. He's very young.

Does he get upset if he can see them?

Original poster

GuinnessLover · 31/12/2022 18:46

Boxofsockss · 31/12/2022 18:44

Sadly live in rented so can't do anything to the house. I've tried putting music on, putting the TV in the bedroom as a treat, doing things like baking or other stuff he loves to distract him, but once he's heard one that's it, he's completely focused on hiding.

OP posts:

Original poster

GuinnessLover · 31/12/2022 18:46

girlmom21 · 31/12/2022 18:45

I'd put some music on and have a disco at home. Let him burn himself out and crash if you need to.

But there's nothing wrong with cuddling in bed until they have stopped. He's very young.

Does he get upset if he can see them?

It's not as bad if he can see them but he still cries. Problem is we live in the city centre and they're going off everywhere.

OP posts:

Original poster

GuinnessLover · 31/12/2022 18:48

He's just told me he thinks me and him and going to die tonight because of the bangs 😭

OP posts:

Boxofsockss · 31/12/2022 18:50

I think the best thing is to try and reinforce a positive association with them then although of course this will take time. Poor little lad.

girlmom21 · 31/12/2022 18:53

GuinnessLover · 31/12/2022 18:48

He's just told me he thinks me and him and going to die tonight because of the bangs 😭

Oh bless him 😭

Fathercrossmas · 31/12/2022 18:55

I was going to say don't tell him as it sounds like he gets more anxious in anticipation but if he already knows then I'd go the other way and spend an hour learning how fireworks work or something and talking about the different types.

tunthebloodyalarmoff · 31/12/2022 19:02

Let him play on iPad with ear phones in

ohheckwhatnow · 31/12/2022 19:13

My ds was terrified of fireworks. When he was about 5 I took him to an organised fireworks display, sounds harsh I guess but i had tried so many other things. He was scared to start with but loved it in the end, there was food and fairground rides etc and he watched all the fireworks. Won't work for everyone but worked for us.

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