How do single parents do it?

[BillyNotQuiteNoMates]

When my DH and I got married, and then pregnant, we decided that I would be a SAHM and he would concentrate on his career and support the family - quite normal at the time anyway. I left uni to stay home with the children and life was good. My older children all lived “that” life. They wanted for nothing that they needed. I took them to school. Picked them up. They never went to after school clubs. Didn’t get left at home on their own for any length of time etc.
But when my youngest DD was 8, my DH left. She’s now in comp, I juggle 3 jobs, and during school holidays she is pretty much left to her own devices. It’s extremely hard for me to take time off work, especially during school holidays. I work Saturdays, and some evenings, to keep a roof over our heads.
She only goes to her dad’s on weekends or when he’s not in work, so those times are always “fun”. He doesn’t spend all his annual leave with her, but he’s always on leave when she goes to stay. I feel so guilty that I can’t match up to that. I’ve worked right through the Christmas holiday - only had two days off work. I came home today, and I’ve managed to get next Tuesday off - the last day before she goes back to school - I asked her what she wants to so, and her face lit up. She’s been so bored for the last two weeks and I feel awful about it. How do other single parents cope with the feeling of guilt that they just can’t be there, no matter how much they want to be?

I think she'll know that you r the parent who was there for her tbh.

I really feel for you. The guilt is awful, isn't it?

Presumably you have checked out that you're receiving all child support, benefits etc that you're entitled to. Universal credit is supportive of single parents, so worth checking online at entitledto.com to see if you could drop 1 job and make up the rest with UC.

If not....and assuming no change of financial circs etc is possible w.g. Downsizing, there is no answer other than you just power through. Make the time with your DD count, make the time that you can for fun. Remind yourself that when she's older, she'll know who was there for her, and she'll see how hard you worked. She really will, I promise.

I now work in a school so get every holiday off and UC helps top of my pay. It's doable, budget weekly food/fun money. I don't drive and we have takeaway once a month on pay day. Not rich but all bills paid so we live the life I can afford

It’s really hard but it sounds like you are doing an amazing job. My mum was a single parent to me and my brother and she worked three jobs to keep a roof over our heads - and what I remember from my childhood is how hard my mum worked and I can see all the sacrifices she made. She did feel guilty she couldn’t do all the things she wanted with us but I don’t resent her for it and it just made the things we did do with her and the times she did take us out more special.