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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think I shouldn't be this wiped out by driving

31 replies

cadburyegg · 30/12/2022 11:19

Drove 200 miles on Tuesday to visit family, stopping once. We are going home today and I am still exhausted. I am dreading the drive home. Surely this isn't normal?? Any tips??
I'm travelling with my mum and 2 kids, my mum isn't confident driving long distances anymore so I can't share the driving.

We are going to Cornwall next summer for a holiday (400 miles) and although we will break up the journey by staying overnight half way, both ways I am starting to worry it's going to be really exhausting.

OP posts:

RedPost · 30/12/2022 11:21

I think if you're not used to driving long distances it is exhausting. The first time I took DS to Uni, I was shattered, but it has got easier now I've done it a few times.

SleeplessInEngland · 30/12/2022 11:22

200 miles a day is a long way. Don't beat yourself up.

thecatsmum12346 · 30/12/2022 11:22

Driving can be tiring and stressful. Take lots of water and ensure you have sunglasses as there’s nothing worse than squinting. Set the car up for maximum comfort. Tell everyone to behave. Travel when the roads are quiet. Stop for coffee/comfort breaks. Think of the journey in stages and chunks. Good luck

bloodyeverlastinghell · 30/12/2022 11:22

I’d agree that it’s because you’re not used to it. I find driving in the dark exhausting on the rare occasion I do it.

user1474315215 · 30/12/2022 11:24

Do you drive regularly? I love driving, but if you're not used to dealing with unfamiliar areas, busy motorways etc then it can be mentally and physically exhausting.

FlounderingFruitcake · 30/12/2022 11:24

A visit to extended family and the whole Christmas period is knackering anyway, I’d feel the same even if I’d taken the train so I don’t think you’re abnormal! For today put music on, get a coffee, stop as many times as you need including at least once for a proper break (not just loo and petrol). When you get home I’d maybe rethink the summer plans though. We do long drives a lot but always share. 400 miles as the only driver would be too much for me, even with an overnight stop.

Oohahhalittlebitmore · 30/12/2022 11:25

Driving exhausts me. It’s all the extra concentration on motorways when people are speeding and you are trying to stay safe. It’s especially exhausting if the weather is bad.

Bard6817 · 30/12/2022 11:26

Its about lack of practice.

I used to drive 5-7 hours twice in a day, leaving ridiculously early, getting back extremely late. Then i as a got a bit older, i stayed over, drove back next day or went up on trains and back. Much easier.

Still did 12 hour journeys to places in france though. Took a day to recover.

Finally changed jobs, but had reason to drive for 3 hours recently, took me a few days to recover.

Age. Practice. Driving long distances with a car full, not easy.

Eleganz · 30/12/2022 11:27

OP, do you do a lot of distance driving? If not then it can be very tiring.

Some things to look at doing:

get your eyesight checked, even if you only need a mild prescription for driving it can make a big difference.
get a pair of driving sun glasses - even on a relatively dull day glare can make you squint and that will make you tired. I always have my sunglasses with me when doing a big drive.
If your car has cruise control, use it! This can make a huge difference on long drives on motorways in terms of tiredness.
make sure you take a decent break with some caffeine and perhaps a little nap if you are feeling tired.

Blanketpolicy · 30/12/2022 11:28

If you are going to cornwall in summer I would aim to drive more than half way on the first leg of the journey as the second one into Cornwall is a nightmare at peak times (or it was in the late 90s when we stopped going because of the increasing journey time)

Esmetempscire · 30/12/2022 11:32

Is your car manual or automatic? I drive a 220 mile journey on a regular basis and had manual cars for 18 yrs. For the last 3 yrs i've had automatics and this has made a huge positive difference to how tired I feel at the end of the journey particularly if there's been congestion or a detour required. Might not be helpful right now but one to consider for the future.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 30/12/2022 11:55

Must be that you’re not used to it.

For me, driving isn’t something I find tiring. I don’t know why. Hopefully it’ll come with practice. Have some stops along the way, break for a cup of tea etc.

If your mum is with you then hopefully she can give you a chance to rest when you get there.

LlynTegid · 30/12/2022 12:02

Not an unreasonable thing. Remember you have to be alert at all times, even if there were not the 25% of people on the road who in my view are unfit to have a licence.

Agree with the comment about having your eyesight checked, if you have not had a test within the last two years.

EmmaAgain22 · 30/12/2022 12:07

I used to love driving but would consider that a too long and tiring journey. To the point I'd have considered a train.

my late father was baffled by this, he REALLY loved driving.

I wouldn't assume something is wrong.

Shoecleaner · 30/12/2022 12:24

That's not normal as your drive was three days ago. Are you unwell in any way, e.g. cold, virus?

KendrickLamaze · 30/12/2022 13:05

Driving is tiring in a way. It lulls me to sleep after a while which can be awkward on a long drive 😂

200 miles is not a big slog but it also depends on the road type which could mean it's double the driving time of motorways.

KendrickLamaze · 30/12/2022 13:07

Also are you sure you're not tired from three days away from home? I'd say a nap or a few hours should clear the tiredness. People aren't tired from marathons three days later so I would be worried.

Mardyface · 30/12/2022 13:11

Depends on the age of the kids too. If there's keeping them entertained included AND chatting to your mum that's really tiring.

It's ok to find driving tiring though! You have to focus continuously in a way you don't for other activities.

Hopeyoursproutsarealreadyon · 30/12/2022 13:13

Decent play list and car sweets! Sherbet lemons at least!

MrsSkylerWhite · 30/12/2022 13:15

What was the weather like? I love driving and drive to Cornwall in one journey most years. Notice a big difference in how I feel though if the weather is poor, requires such intense concentration.

HelpMeGetThrough · 30/12/2022 13:20

If you are not used to driving long distances, you will be tired. Also depends on size of car and road type.

200 miles is only around 3 hours driving (if motorway), so you shouldn't still be feeling the drive from 3 days ago.

Anotheanon · 30/12/2022 13:30

I regularly drive 300 miles. I don’t feel tired after. My kids are no longer children though which I think will make a difference.
Have you tried an audio book that you can all listen to. I really enjoy one on a drive.

Anotheanon · 30/12/2022 13:31

Oh, and easy to eat snacks that a passenger can pass to you can help.

Burgoo · 30/12/2022 13:31

Human beings can only effectively focus for around an hour before they are effectively on auto-pilot. Driving takes a lot of concentration. No wonder you felt tired!

zingally · 30/12/2022 15:22

I'm the same.
I had a long, difficult drive home from my mums on the 28th. A journey that should have taken 2 hours, turned into nearly 4. It was a lot of stop-start driving as well, so the last half an hour, my left foot was both numb AND in pain.

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