To ask about bed wetting (5YO DD)?

[Namechxnge]

My daughter still wets the bed most night. She has peen potting trained in the day since just after she was 2.

The past week, we have been stopping food/drunk at 4pm and then she will go to bed at 8pm, using the toilet beforehand.

She has wet the bed most night. But she will wake up right after she wees.

Tonight for example, I checked her bed around 12.15am and it was dry, then she woke up at 1.30am saying it was wet. Is there anyway I can help her wake up instead of sleeping through it?

Nope.

restricting fluids won’t help anyway- she needs the full bladder sensation to wake her up so it’s counterproductive.

she won’t have started producing the hormone that causes the kidneys to shut down at night. She needs more time.

no food or drink from 4 pm is cruel. That’s what 14 hours overnight? No.

put her back in nappies or pull ups and wait for the night time hormones to kick in. Let her drink and eventually her brain will recognise the signals from a stretched bladder and wake her up.

Well I wouldn't say it was actually 4 hours. Today she finished tea at 5pm and went to bed at 7.30, so only 2.5 hours?

I dont have it in my to refuse her water/food if she is hungry. But I havent allowed it right before bed.

I was trying as it seems that most kids are dry at night now. But I have read not to worry until age 7.

1 in 5 are still not dry at night aged 7.

that’s 6 kids in a class of 30.

it’s normal and nothing to worry about.

she’s not eating or drinking from 4/5pm until
she gets up in the morning? That’s too long for a 5 year old. And like I said won’t help anyway.

The ERIC website has a great deal of information about child continence and is well worth a read.

I would imagine that your DD isn't yet producing the hormone that slows down urine production in the night (which isn't something you can force or hurry, though you can get a prescription for a synthetic version once they're 8 ish or older). In addition, it sounds like she isn't waking at the signal that her bladder is full: this can be worked on with the use of an alarm to wake her immediately when she urinates, in the hope that her body starts to associate urinating with waking. Personally I'd wait until there's a higher chance she is producing the hormone, or that she is on the prescribed synthetic hormone, before you try the alarm.

After reading the ERIC website, if you want to take it further, the GP is the first call, and they can then refer to the continence service. My experience with them has been absolutely confirming of all the information on the ERIC website.

Thank you both for replying. I think I will just get some nappies again.

I know my sister wet the bed until she was about 8, I remember she had an alarm but obviously she doesn't anymore as an adult.

I think if she is 7 and still wetting the bed then I will contact the GP.

Totally normal not to be dry overnight at 5 years.

And I will have a look at the ERIC website!

Wait - the hormone production will happen in due time. The bladder muscles are the last to mature too. All you can and should do is relax and destress what Mother Nature will take care of. We were told by GP to go back at age 11, if night wetting was still happening- it sorted naturally at age 9

I wake up DC6 when I go to bed and he wees every time. Then he stumbles back to bed like a little zombie, it is actually cute. Maybe you can revisit the issue in a few months. In the meantime, I would put pull-ups on her for the night. Don't make a big deal of if it.

It is cruel and unhealthy to withhold food or drink from a child, please stop this. It won't help with the issue and causes lots of other problems.

Glad you posted and have been directed to the ERIC website.

Put her in pull ups not nappies.

That way she can get up and go to toilet in the night or first thing in the morning without screaming for you.

My 4 year old will often wake up and rush to the toilet, though she still intermittently wets herself at night.

Honestly, I left my son in nighttime nappies/pullups until they were regularly dry. It upset him too much when he wet the bed and wasn't worth the stress. He stopped maybe a year or 2 after being daytime trained.

He also has a water bottle in bed because withholding fluid is bad.

Segue, how are her bowel movements? The 2 can be connected:

"A distended bowel can put pressure on the bladder, shrinking its capacity, so the child cannot hold as much urine during the night".

My son was slightly constipated and once we sorted that out it seemed to help with nighttime dryness.

Two of my dss didn't stop wetting the bed until they were 10.

They wore dry nites pyjama pants and I always used bed mats to save the mattresses. I would layer up bed mat, sheet, bed mat, sheet so I could just whip off the wet layer, wipe the child down or have a quick shower and they could get back to sleep quicker.

Never ever made a big deal about it.

They became self conscious re sleepovers etc and asked if there was anything to be done about it.

I took them to the GP aged 8 who said to wait until they were 10. At 10, the GP gave them some medication. They took it but meanwhile, they still wet the bed.

After they finished the 3 month course of medication, they slowly had more dry nights than wet. Both are dry now. Well, one is 17 so I would hope so! 😁

But it is just the way some kids are. My other two were dry at night from 4 years old.

Your dd will get dry eventually.

My dd was nearly 6 before she was dry at night, completely different to my DS who was dry at night from the moment he potty trained at 3. I got fed up changing the bed in the middle of the night and so I work her when I went to bed around 10:30 or 11pm and took her to the toilet. That stopped the bed wetting at least. I did that for a few months and then just wondered what would happen if I didn't waken her, and amazingly she's been dry all night since then and I don't get her up during the night anymore.

I know it feels like they'll never get it but suddenly it just happens

• woke not work

One of my kids was dry at 2 (almost 3) the other not until nearer 6. I'd go back to pull ups

Dd wet the bed every night until she was 8.
we tried everything, including the alarm.
In the end we stopped stressing and just used pull ups and reasoned it would stop in its own time.
It did.
Some kids just take longer to get to certain points than others.

Glad others have given you the ERIC info. Just to add from my experience with my eldest who bed wet til about 7-8, we eventually contacted GP who put us in touch with a specialist nurse. We monitored urine output for a few days by weeing in a bottle which identified it was too low for his age and therefore he wasn't drinking enough during the day to properly stretch his bladder and allow it to hold a nights worth of urine. So we spent a few weeks gradually increasing fluids through the day which feels counterintuitive but started to help. We also cut out blackcurrant squash which is apparently a bladder irritant. This improved things but didn't stop it. We did eventually have to use a bed wetting alarm which is quite a commitment but gave good results within about 2 weeks of starting. So she's only young yet but there are a number of things you can try if you wanted to when she or you are ready

It’s literally a hormone thing. You can’t night-train, you have to wait for her body to do it. My 2YO is night dry and my 5YO isn’t. Just the way it goes 🤷🏼‍♀️

My DS, who is 6 in a month, still isn't dry at night. Whereas his twin sister has been dry at night for the better part of 2 years now.

I spoke to the doctor about it maybe 4-5 months ago now, who said not to be concerned until he's at least 7yo.

For the meantime, he's in pull-ups at night, and I'm trying to be chill about it! He's been dry in the daytime for years now, and was much easier to train than his sister at the time.

Before you revert to pull-ups, I would suggest that you try a few weeks of waking her when you go to bed; take her to the toilet and then straight back to bed.

DD9 still wets heavily in a pull up. We've been going to the enuresis clinic since she was in reception because she was very wet during the day. Luckily that sorted itself by year 1.

Whereas both DS decided after turning 4 that they didn't want pull ups and have never had a wet bed.

Changing drinking habits haven't worked for us, we're just going with it and hoping DD gets the hormone soon! She doesn't have sleepovers so it's not a huuuge deal right now.

If you do this- scopulae if things you need to be aware of.

they need to be fully awake and aware. If you take them half asleep you are effectively teaching them to pee in their sleep. You need to wake them, then they need to be alert enough to get themselves to the toilet without help.

secondly, it still won’t help them develop that biofeedback mechanism where the full
bladder signals to the brain to wake up. If the bladder isn’t allowed to fill they won’t wake if they do need the toilet.

we tried, gave up because it distressed dc being woken up from a sound sleep and also because it didn’t help, they’d be wet an hour later.

I can totally see that it won't work for every child; I do think it's worth trying before going back into nappies though ☺️

Try the Wet-Stop bed wetting alarm.
Recommended by our doctor, paediatric incontinence team and health visitor.

Son aged 8 years.

Advice was no pull ups at night so he got to understand the wet feeling. Drink enough in the day 1000-1400ml for his age (he wasn't, and drinking lots in the evening instead), no drinks 1-2 hours before bed (we went with 1 hour). Water is best and try to avoid fizzy drinks/strong squash. Encourage them and don't be negative of it doesn't work out at first. ERIC website great for ideas too.

Improvements within 2 weeks (originally wetting 2/3 times per night). 4 months on and no alarm and he's dry.