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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To know what’s the best route to get help please **trigger warning mental health***

18 replies

Luckysdadsrules1 · 29/12/2022 09:52

Hi
I have always struggled with my mental health. Grew up in a violent household (although never to me), then was sexually abused by an uncle for most of my teen years. Since being free of that abuse, I have struggled with health anxiety. Massively. There have been many times that I have wanted to end my life, although not recently. Please don’t take this as me being I’m at risk. I wouldn’t do anything stupid.
Since having children (DC1 was touch and go for both of us during labour, and DC2 was poorly as a baby) I have become obsessed with their health and mine. I have managed this by not talking about it in front of children and discuss concerns with my husband who then (being lovely and level headed) decides if they need medical attention or not. Recently I have been having what I can only describe as hallucinations. I keep having visions that my DS dies and I can see his funeral in my head. I then convince myself this is a premonition and go into overdrive with worrying about his health.

I am already on a high dose of venaflaxine and have previously had CBT but these new visions are ruining my life.

What can I do to get help? GP is good but can’t prescribe a higher dose and he knows that whilst CBT helped me last time as soon as it stopped I went back to how I was before.

what can I do?
sorry for the essay. Thank you if you got this far xx

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 29/12/2022 09:55

Won’t GP refer you to psych? That seems the logical next step? Or add another medication in if needed.
I am so sorry you’re suffering.
CBT only works if it teaches you techniques that you then go on to use daily. Is there anything from that you can go back to?

UnpackThisMess · 29/12/2022 09:59

I get these just before I go to sleep once I'm in bed. Like a sort of awake dream and it's always about something bad happening to the kids. In real life I'm very laid back and not anxious but I think these visions I have are some anxiety coming out before sleep. I just ignore it and generally then get to sleep straight away. So I wonder if it could just be further anxiety coming out. But obviously you need to seek medical attention.

PandaOrLion · 29/12/2022 10:01

I’d have therapy - approach a few private therapists and see if they offer a subsidy if the cost is too high; most will. Explain you’ve had some CBT but need more support now.

Original poster
Luckysdadsrules1 · 29/12/2022 10:03

I’m not sure whether this is something that A and E could help with? GP referred before and it got triaged as booklets and online help which I don’t want.

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 29/12/2022 10:08

Worth trying whatever they suggest. And no. It’s not an accident or emergency so I wouldn’t turn up there.

Original poster
Luckysdadsrules1 · 29/12/2022 10:11

Thank you.
I heard that they have mental health staff in A and Es? Is this not right? X

OP posts:
dinosaurcookie · 29/12/2022 10:18

The mental health staff at a&e deal with crisis situations such as immediate risk to self or others. The best route is the GP who can refer onto the most appropriate mental health service in your area.

MuckyPlucky · 29/12/2022 10:19

Liaison Psych at A&E is for psychiatric emergencies, the same way the medical doctors at A&E are for medical emergencies. Liaison psych assess people for imminent risk to self or others, and whether people need to be hospitalised.

It’s rubbish that referrals to secondary MH care take forever but bypassing the usual processes/waiting list by attending A&E isn’t the way, as they wont act on anything if not an emergency, and it will further add to the unbelievable pressure on A&E.

Book an appointment to see your GP and ask for referral to IAPT. I’m pretty sure there are CBT courses aimed at managing the symptoms of health anxiety. You would probably also benefit from some trauma therapy (EMDR) to tackle the root underlying causes of your HA.

Good luck and all the best 💐

LeopardPrintHo · 29/12/2022 10:20

The mental health staff in A&E will just sign post you to various organisations including booklets and online help. Does your GP have a primary care mental health network? Most GP's in the country have this and it consists of mental health nurses, psychologists. You should also be able to self refer to your local IAPT?

Original poster
Luckysdadsrules1 · 29/12/2022 10:27

Thank you. I have done an online referral to a local IAPT.
Thank you so so much x

OP posts:
Pinkdelight3 · 29/12/2022 10:28

If the CBT helped then more of that and ongoing commitment to using the techniques seems like the way to go. A&E MH services are for crises, not for this kind of issue and it's very patchy at that so I'd discount that and pursue the longer-term solutions on this thread. Sorry you're going through this and I hope you get the help you need. You sound very self-aware and your DH sounds supportive which is all hopeful.

Idtotallybangdreamoftheendlessnotgonnalie · 29/12/2022 10:45

That childhood sounds like it's a high risk of giving you CPTSD. I'm not sure what services are like where you are but where I am there's a highly specialised mental health "trauma and veterans" service that deals with the effects of CSA.

CBT is good, but it isn't always the most trauma informed approach. If you've had a shit childhood you might need to deal with the festering wound that is CPTSD before it really works for you. I had EDMR and it was insanely helpful, it totally changed my life.

Thischarmlessgirl · 29/12/2022 10:55

EMDR therapy would potentially be very useful. It’s for trauma. These intrusive thoughts are very distressing, I’ve had similar and EMDR made a huge difference.

Tattyoldted · 29/12/2022 11:02

Good luck OP. I self-referred earlier this year following a breakdown, saw the GP too who although very sympathetic, couldn’t do more for me than give me the details to self-refer. I’m in a much better place now, I hope it works for you too. I find meditation helps too.

Stressedmum2017 · 29/12/2022 11:07

Those aren't hallucinations they would be intrusive thoughts/anxiety. You won't get fast tracked to mental health team unless you are really unwell at crisis generally, same goes for a and e. I think your only option is to going back to the gp.

JusteanBiscuits · 29/12/2022 11:12

I see you have found your local IAPT service. They are really very good - they will assess you and either refer you on to a more appropriate service, or provide you with therapy themselves. Good luck!

WhoWants2Know · 29/12/2022 11:25

You can dial 111 and choose option 2 if you feel you need urgent help. But there are also lots of phone and text chat lines that can help talk you through difficult situations. https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/guides-to-support-and-services/crisis-services/helplines-listening-services/

mumof2andstillsurviving · 29/12/2022 11:30

I was also going to suggest 111, they helped me before when I was in crisis and it helps to streamline you to the right support. Mitazapine is good additional medication along side venlafaxine. It's known as California rocket fuel and it helped me for quite a few years. I have also discovered this podcast by Carolyn Spring, who is a survivor and really helps explain why our bodies and brains do the things they do. It really helped me to make sense of my own experiences (I was also sexually abused for most of my childhood) www.carolynspring.com/podcast/

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