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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that you catch cold sores?

51 replies

autienotnaughty · 28/12/2022 22:36

Two of my friends regularly get cold sores they are adamant that they have never caught them from someone but that they were born with the virus? Is this true or are they talking rubbish. ?

OP posts:
YetMoreNewBeginnings · 28/12/2022 22:37

It can be birth acquired

GolfEchoRomeoTangoIndia · 28/12/2022 22:39

You can catch them while you're being born if you're exceptional

SomethingOriginal2 · 28/12/2022 22:39

You can catch it off your mum during birth if she has herpes. But I don't think you can catch it in the womb.

Singleandproud · 28/12/2022 22:40

Lots of people get them as a child from sharing drinks or adults kissing them whilst they are infected. I don't think you can be born with them unless the mother had genital herpes at the time of birth as the virus can be passed on during a vaginal delivery.

GolfEchoRomeoTangoIndia · 28/12/2022 22:41

Exceptionally unlucky, and your mother has an active genital infection.

But everything online says that you can't catch it in utero.

Helenahandkart · 28/12/2022 22:57

the cold sore virus can kill newborns, so your friend needs to be really careful around babies when she has an active sore.

AngryGoblin · 28/12/2022 22:58

It’s the herpes virus. You can catch it, 100%

Hotsweatymomspagetti · 28/12/2022 23:00

I’m 99% sure you can’t just be born with….you have to catch it whether that be at birth which is unlikely or later in life

RegularNameChangerVersion21 · 28/12/2022 23:03

It's caused by a virus so you need to catch it. I've had it since I was very young - definitely by the time I was four - so well before snogging age. Most people actually have the virus by the time they're adults but not all of those actually suffer from cold sores.

Pocketfullofdogtreats · 28/12/2022 23:06

It might be dormant and flare up when you're stressed and your resistance is low. I'm sure this is the case with me. I've caught it at some point as an adult and it flares up at stressful times. Like now!

JustAnotherManicNameChange · 28/12/2022 23:08

You have to catch it as it's a virus. It's possible to catch it at birth or as a newborn/young baby.

Probably they've had them for so long they don't remember an actual infection. Like oh my mum had it and kissed me or i shared my glass with her or whatever.

Do they actually lack the basic understanding of cold sores or do they just mean they've always had them?

HootyMcboob76 · 28/12/2022 23:15

Most people catch the virus as young children from being kissed by a person with the Herpes Simplex (HSV1) virus.

People with the virus have it for the rest of their lives, it usually lies dormant but can flare up under some circumstances.

And - they are HIGHLY infectious.

Original poster
autienotnaughty · 28/12/2022 23:20

JustAnotherManicNameChange · 28/12/2022 23:08

You have to catch it as it's a virus. It's possible to catch it at birth or as a newborn/young baby.

Probably they've had them for so long they don't remember an actual infection. Like oh my mum had it and kissed me or i shared my glass with her or whatever.

Do they actually lack the basic understanding of cold sores or do they just mean they've always had them?

When I make a point of not sharing drinks etc they act like I'm being ridiculous and say they never caught them and that some people just have the virus. So I assume they mean born with it. They refuse to believe they caught it at some point. One is a teacher and the other was a nurse!

OP posts:
RudsyFarmer · 28/12/2022 23:27

We were so cautious around our child and yet he still caught it and had his first outbreak around 3/4. That fucker is just SO contagious

AtrociousCircumstance · 28/12/2022 23:28

They are idiots.

JustAnotherManicNameChange · 28/12/2022 23:29

@autienotnaughty they're being daft and lazy then. You stick to your rules. At best you can send them a link/article maybe from NHS but if they're the "it won't happen to me type" (which most of us outgrow by 30 ) it will be pointless. It really sucks for the people they're spreading it willy nilly too if they don't have your rules and boundaries though.

SomethingOriginal2 · 28/12/2022 23:39

autienotnaughty · 28/12/2022 23:20

When I make a point of not sharing drinks etc they act like I'm being ridiculous and say they never caught them and that some people just have the virus. So I assume they mean born with it. They refuse to believe they caught it at some point. One is a teacher and the other was a nurse!

Show quote history

They caught it. They're idiots. Don't share drinks with them and if you even have a baby don't let them anywhere near. It makes babies very very ill and can kill them.

WorriedWarrier · 29/12/2022 00:25

It’s skin to skin

Kalasbyxor · 29/12/2022 00:38

What adults share drinks? Eugh. I've got some lovely friends and relatives but it would never cross my mind to share drinks with any of them.
I also drill my kids never to share drinks.

Diedre44 · 29/12/2022 00:42

www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-6315321/Baby-died-just-eight-days-old-catching-herpes-cold-sore.html

Do not let anyone kiss your baby.
My now NC mother and sister would get whacking huge cold sores on their mouths and up their noses and were always put out that I would not let them pick up my DS let alone kiss and cuddle him. Sister had her 2nd baby a year later and had her first cold sore round her mouth at around 3yrs.
Neither me or DS have ever had a cold sore.

YetMoreNewBeginnings · 29/12/2022 00:44

Kalasbyxor · 29/12/2022 00:38

What adults share drinks? Eugh. I've got some lovely friends and relatives but it would never cross my mind to share drinks with any of them.
I also drill my kids never to share drinks.

Shit loads of people do - you see people doing the “ooh try this…” thing and sharing glasses all the time in bars.

Changingmynameyetagain · 29/12/2022 00:47

My MIL gets them and we’ve been very strict about physical contact when she gets an active flare up, absolutely no kissing, and any utensils and glasses etc go straight in the dishwasher,
She also has a separate hand towel in the bathroom.
So far none of my DC have caught them and I’d like it to stay that way.

Notimeforaname · 29/12/2022 00:49

My father and I have always had them. My mother and sister have never had one.

Notimeforaname · 29/12/2022 00:51

My mother has been kissing my father for 40 years and never caught it. I think some people are just immune to it.

Notimeforaname · 29/12/2022 00:52

I might be wrong but it was explained to me before that we all carry the virus. Some deal with outbreaks, others so not, ever.

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