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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Attention addict relative.

3 replies

purplethings · 27/12/2022 04:45

I'm being driven crazy by a relative who's staying for Xmas. They are very attention seeking, they engage you in 'conversation' which is utterly one sided, invade your personal space by standing really close and basically just talk at you, endless tales about things they've done and people you've never met. There's no room for any actual conversation, you're just there to witness and give attention. Nothing you add to the conversation is acknowledged or relevant to their stream of consciousness.
If you engage them in a task then they ask endless stupid questions like ' where's this' or 'should I do that', even though they know the answers, just as a means to extract yet more attention.

My DC are hiding in their rooms and I'm missing out on spending time with them. I'm running out of avoidance strategies. I don't want to be rude but literally the only way to escape is to cut off mid sentence and remember something you just have to be doing elsewhere.

This Relative recently lost their partner. They've always been like this but in the past they've been diluted somewhat because they had company. Because of this I want to be caring and supportive but its unbearably draining and exhausting just being round them. AIBU not to be more empathic and just give them the attention they are clearly craving or is it completely reasonable that I take time out for myself and my DC and leave relative to their own devices.

OP posts:
Greenwish · 27/12/2022 05:54

Yes just leave them to it and do your own thing as much as you can. This sounds unbearable.

Mummieslncorporated · 27/12/2022 06:17

I'm guessing it's your mum, and you don't want to say in case that changes how people feel.

Doesn't change my opinion though. I would find it very difficult. Can your children be invited to something, and when you drop them off, you get asked/told you need to join to, so you go along (aka you take your kids somewhere for the day/morning/afternoon). Send your relative a quick message to say sorry, been delayed. Will be home by x time.

BruceAndNosh · 27/12/2022 06:20

Mother or MIL?

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