Nephew (who we don't know) staying with us

[Plant2628]

Heading abroad for a holiday and to visit family. Husband is not from UK and from place we are visiting. BIL wants to fly nephew across country to stay with us for 3 nights (BIL can't come) and then join us visiting other family for a few days. Nephew is 14 and doesn't know us. I'm slightly apprehensive. He doesn't come from a great background. This will give him a trip away, time with us and to meet our young kids. Would you do this...?

I can’t imagine the nephew really wants to do this either? 14 year old boys do not want to hang out with unknown aunties and uncles and smaller children. Does BIL want childcare? I’d try and get to the bottom of the reason for the trip.

Unknown teen with our children. What if he does something or makes stuff up about us? He's no history of that though nor have parents. Like I say husband thinks I've lost my marbles. Just wary. You're responses suggest it really is just me with anxiety and major overthinking.

This is an opportunity for him. He's never really left where he's from. First passport being obtained to take a trip day trip just offshore to another country

Above

Thanks all

A 14 year old relative for three nights? I don’t care if you’ve never met him or whether his background is ‘terrible’ (what exactly does that mean?), You’re not going to be leaving him alone with your kids so you’re being totally ridiculous.

WTF?

You know your children will be teenagers one day

For his sake don't take him. If this is what you already think of him, it will not be a pleasant journey for him, your hate for him will shine through. What a horrible comment to make

I still don't get it. He's 14, he's just a teenager interested in meeting his uncle and cousins, and hanging out somewhere new. Make a plan for each day to have activity before a load of food, an activity after lunch, something to do in the evening plus a load of food, and job's done. If he's really too much trouble then you drop him early at the other relatives, but I doubt he would be if the kid's never even travelled, he'll be just interested to see new things.

I find your tone rather difficult. You know and happily describe his background as "difficult", day you don't know him, say what you believe he thinks... It's very uncomfortable to be honest. He's just a kid and you know nothing of his character, so stop picking at someone you've never even met. Your DH is happy and it's his nephew, step out of the way.

The nephew, 'not coming from a great background', seems to be the crux of the issue you seem to have with him.

What exactly are you implying about him OP?

Why did you marry someone from a different culture if you were going to be a such a pain about it?

Well I wouldn’t be overjoyed at entertaining a 14 year old I didn’t know for 4 days on holiday. Whatever their background.
just because I’d feel awkward that we weren’t doing what they liked etc. And assuming the DC will all get along? That doesn’t always work with teens.

Be like a weird exchange trip.

You do sound a bit like you've lost your marbles tbf.

I would if it was just for 3 days. I’d just make sure I had info from parents and emergency contacts (I know parents are 3 hrs away but they could travel that easily if there was a big issue). I can understand why you’d feel uncomfortable though as it is unusual. I’d see it as some time to get to know him and for your children to get to know their cousin.