To have walked out

[Eggmcmuffin]

I'm starting to feel resentment towards my husband as its the age old tale of hes lazy and I do everything.

I worked all day then tackled the cleaning and all the while had a pre schooler ro look after which he was meant to do today. After sitting on the sofa on his phone all morning he popped out for an hour then came back 5 hours later. I just went straight out when he came back, told him he needed to sort kids tea and am now sat in my car enjoying a nice take away coffee. I don't think I was unreasonable considering, and might make this a new year's resolution to do it more often!

YABU for procreating with such a shit partner.

This is what your life is going to be like btw, enjoy it now but it’s going to get a bit tiring having to sit in your car for the next god knows how many years

Well done for going out. Do it a lot.

Why won’t the dickhead clean?

YABU for not talking to him about it and telling him he needs to step up. Disappearing isn't actually going to solve the problem.

But it won’t help in the long term. Time to have a proper discussion. Who does what? When? He needs to have some responsibility and actually act like a partner or you may as well dump him.

I think @BrookieButter was being a bit harsh.

Were you unreasonable to tell him it’s his turn to parent his own children and go take time for yourself? No.

BUT. This will not solve the resentment you feel building for him, and if he’s an arsehole to you about this when you get home, then it’s only going to make the situation worse.

If this is a common occurrence, if you can’t communicate with him about it, or you’ve tried to communicate, gotten nowhere, and given up, then it’s time to read up on the Four Horsemen of Divorce to figure out if this is even fixable. The strongest indicator of an impending divorce out of the four is contempt, and it sounds like you have that for your husband in spades.

Good on you for walking out as soon as he came back - I hope you enjoy your coffee!

On another note though it does sound like you need a very strong word with him - is he always like this?
If so - you need to somehow give him one hell of a shock to make him help, put up with this shite forever or leave?

A New Year’s resolution to hide in your car, away from your own home, more often - to get your husband to do anything?
There are better resolutions 🤷🏻‍♀️