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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Bad attitude

3 replies

Familyiness · 21/12/2022 18:57

Please tell me Aibu?
Me and hubby been together 13.5 years, but unfortunately his son who is 15 is starting to act up, attitude starting arguments and making my children feel uneasy when he is here.
He has had very little in the way of consequences at home and hasn't had the same upbringing mine have had.
Just this last week he has been horrible to his dad, he works 8hrs a day Monday to Friday, is 47 and by Friday he is shattered complaining his day is tired on the Friday. Then tried to take a pop at me, making put his dad has to ask if he can stay, we only have one spare bed and occasionally my sister comes to stay as she lives far away. It's more he is giving me a heads up to prepare for an extra plate for dinner and make sure that there aren't any plans he isn't aware of or has forgotten about. This was after he got involved in my youngests relationship and told her we aren't his family. This upset my kids as they all by him gifts at Xmas and treat him as family, always invited to family events, days out etc and on occasions he has said he was coming and then had a better offer, after a family member has already paid for his place.
We take him on holiday, next year my 4 are going turkey with their dad for his 50th. So I booked for the 3 of us DSS, myself and dh for next year, which I have paid for.
I feel like just me and dh going as his attitude stinks.
Aibu, to think at 15, 16 next year that he should understand consequences and its time he had some.

OP posts:
DrSmoot · 21/12/2022 20:08

They can go through a horrible phase. I think it’s all the uncertainty. Pressure of GCSE’s, what they are going to do next, hormones etc.
I’ve know some 15 year old be absolutely hideous to live with then, around 17/18, they turn a corner and are an absolute delight. It’s like the teenage version of the terrible two’s. It will pass.

Keyansier · 21/12/2022 20:14

This was difficult for me to read. I couldn't keep up with who was what age and who was working and who shouted at who, etc.

Tbh, I think you're correct in only you and your DH to go on holiday. Not because it would be a punishment for him, but because it will be a relief for you (do you really want to pay to go on holiday with a whining teenager?) and a relief for him (does he really want to go on holiday with his parents who he currently is not getting along with, and nobody his own age to hang out with?) It will be spoiled all round and will only serve to enflame tensions further.

Comedycook · 21/12/2022 20:18

In the nicest possible way, your writing style makes it quite hard to work out what is going on...but this doesn't sound beyond the realms of normal for a 15 year old.

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