Friend and guy I was seeing

[iamop]

I know I probably am being unreasonable. I just have this horrible sick feeling in my stomach. I was seeing this man for a few months, it really was nothing serious, mainly sex to be honest and that was all good. However, I would say I developed feelings but I kept them to myself and didn't share with anyone.

I met this man on a night out with one of my best friends. When I told her I had been seeing him she was like, 'oh I don't even remember him'. That was that.

Me and him haven't spoken in 6 months however, I still have him on Instagram but hadn't been on in like 2 months. Went on this morning and noticed that they are now following each other on Instagram.

I don't know why I feel weird about this. Years back, this same girl got very drunk and was then hitting on my partner at the time who I have a child with. However, we blamed it on the drink and got through it.

I'm not sure if maybe old feelings about that are coming up? I wasn't committed to him and he wasn't committed to me and so of course he can follow who he likes it's none of my business.

It's just the fact that my friend said she couldn't even remember him but follows him on Instagram. Also we were out for lunch just a few weeks ago and he actually came up in conversation and she never said anything.

AIBU to feel uneasy about this? Why do I feel sick to my stomach?

Intuition perhaps?
Sorry it’s a horrible feeling, being lied to (if she is)

That's the thing though, I can never find out because I'll look like a paranoid nut. It could just be a totally harmless follow, I don't know but I just feel weird about it.

“I don’t know him” is total bull. She’s lying to you. Hardly the basis of a good friendship.

Also:

Years back, this same girl got very drunk and was then hitting on my partner at the time who I have a child with.

Should’ve got rid of her then to be honest. Alcohol is no excuse. Seems she likes your dudes / cast offs.

You're probably right. I feel sick about it weirdly but I don't want to overreact either.

I've just asked her outright anyways. I said 'ohh I see you and whatshisname follow each other on Instagram, how did that happen? Have yous been talking?xxx'

Does it really matter? Maybe she looked him up on Instagram after you kept on mentioning him out of curiosity?

You shagged this guy for a few months and haven't seen him in half a year it was hardly some great love affair. And following someone on Instagram doesn't necessarily mean anything more than people like to follow who their friends are following/liking to have as many followers as possible.

Sounds dodgy, I think your intuition is right.

Years ago I had a friend like that, she would “befriend” guys I was interested in.
Eventually one guy who I had stronger feelings for told me she had started messaging him telling him he was too young to think about getting serious with me and he should be young and have fun, followed by serious flirting!

Yes you could be right

She replied that she had him on Instagram since my birthday night but I know that's a one hundred percent lie. Oh well, not much I can do.