DD16 yrs finally diagnosed ADHD . A.I.B.U to complain to her school for not referring earlier, or should i be grateful that they did?

[Quirkyones]

It was not for the want of trying to get dd diagnosed; i had a feeling since early primary but was met with brick wall , or told, 'everyone's looking for a label'. DD passed 5 G.C.S.Es at C level, so did well but I am really sad to think that maybe with added support or understanding, then she may have done better and her self esteem might not have been as low as it has been.

I am thinking of complaining , with the intention of making girls with A.d.h.d noticed earlier. I would also now like other screening done to see if she has mild autism /dyslexia as she has traits of both. Or would this become a set back for DD in sixth form?

A diagnosis does not necessarily result in additional support so I can't see any concrete reason why school didn't refer.

I mean it can only be one of two things - they are cruel and (despite suspecting she had ADHD) suppressed this knowledge for nefarious reasons, or they genuinely felt that, all things considered, she was neurotypical. Maybe she was very good at masking, maybe you had a huge succession of teachers who just aren't very good at identifying ADHD, but I really do think that this was not done maliciously.

You've obviously experienced this but it shouldn't be the case. Support is based on need not diagnosis. Schools are not doctors and not allowed to diagnose. As an experienced teacher I'll be quite direct with parents but I wouldn't be that confident as a young/new teacher.

It sounds as if your GP also dismissed your concerns and did not refer, so seems unsurprising that teachers also missed it.

This is true, the diagnosis is irrelevant as far as the school goes. Support depends on needs, not diagnosis. A student with ADHD, ASD and dyslexia may need less support than a student with all three conditions diagnosed

It would be lovely if it was as straightforward as to be able to ask the gp for a referal. My gp, who is as helpful and accessible as the system allows and know my dd well still has had to ask me to exhaust the referal process at alcohol before she can help my dd in this respect.

What @whee said.

A GP will state referrals will get rejected without the school input. So for all those judging. When it has probably been a really hard 16 years with no support. Please don't!

I felt like this when my son recently got diagnosed. For years and years I got told by the school they did not agree. They finally referred in his last year and he had a diagnosis. My son really suffers from low self esteem too. I find it sad as if he had a early diagnosis. Things may have been very different.

Sadly it is very difficult to get progress on this however you do it. We have had to pay for everything privately (school were helpful, but only up to a point until we got the actual diagnosis).

I don't think schools should be diagnosing anything - they haven't the expertise. I got a couple of hours on SEN in my teacher training and wrote a theoretical essay. Everything useful I know is from parenting an SEN child.

My daughter was diagnosed ADHD/Autistic a week before her 18th birthday. Super bright as a child, flew through primary and secondary, even did some GCSE'S 2 years early. Got to A-levels and she could not retain anything and really really struggled. Was literally failing everything and I was dead worried for her as it wasn't like her to struggle learning, she was literally a sponge for knowledge.she was get predicted E's by the January of her final year of A-levels. Put her on medication and she passed with B's & C's. But she is no longer the same person. Taken a year out before Uni, and literally doesn't leave the house, before that she was always out and about. I don't think she is going to make Uni. She is having therapy and blames me for not noticing, what were quite apparent signs in girls. But I just saw my kid achieving and hitting all her targets. Granted she never shut up as a toddler or slept as a baby, but all the advice was she was hungry and my breast milk wasn't enough, and being talkative was normal. Girls mask really well, as we just adjust and get on with things, the best we can. Boys on the other hand show more, my youngest being ADHD and from a baby I was aware something wasn't right and by the age of 3, was on the pathway and getting assistance, wasn't diagnosed though until he was 7.

It's a shambles but not the schools fault..she clearly attends there. Its the parent then GP route...then repeat then repeat over and over.

Why are you blaming the school. If you thought there was something needing investigating it’s up to you to get the ball rolling, DD has ADHD also diagnosed at 16. I sorted the assessment and told school. Wasn’t their job to arrange

I went to the GP. Said I want a referal and she said ok. That was it

It must vary between areas as where I live the GP says all referrals go via school.

Same here.

@solidaritea

I'm actually fairly familiar with the system and your comment does show a real lack of vision about the purpose of diagnosis. Even if the diagnosis doesn't free up resources for the child within school (and often it doesn't) it can make a huge difference for the child themselves because they feel understood and their issues aren't due to lack of effort or understanding. It also gives the parents a greater understanding of their child and how they can go about helping them. If this wasn't the case you wouldn't have grown adults who have long left school paying large sums of money to get a diagnosis.

The barriers put up by (some) schools are real. In some areas because the referral has to come via the school and even when that's not the case teachers will sometimes over reach their expertise and categorically state the child doesn't have ADHD/ASD/Dyslexia or state that the school work isn't making the child anxious because that anxiety isn't apparent in the classroom. It can take alot of confidence on the part of a parent to ignore a professional giving you these statements.

The route in through the GP and you need to press this. Some children are home schooled or dont go to school so there may not be a school process.

Schools are not part of the health system, camhs and the diagnosis services are part of the health system.

This is accurate.

Complaining now won’t achieve anything.

This is actually a very unhelpful response.

When it was my PFB and autism, I made all of the noises until I was heard. He was assessed aged 3.

DC3 was also diagnosed with ADHD aged 6, because I made a lot of noise.

The hardest diagnosis to get was DH for ADHD (finally when he was aged 44). This is because he is an adult and I couldn't do it all for him.

It is not the teachers/schools job to diagnose your child. Their job is to support the child's learning.

I understand your need to search for answers, but as the parent, it is your job to be the advocate for your child.

Love, a teacher who has ADHD students, is DM to a diagnosed ADHD child and an ASD child, plus married to ADHD DH.

This.

Diagnosis is important for so many reasons; firstly, how can we meet the child's needs without understanding exactly what those needs are? A thorough assessment could identify areas in which a child is struggling that we might not be fully aware of. That's the point of it, surely?! Assess the challenges in order to inform the parents and teachers about the support the child might need. Secondly, it helps the child understand and accept themselves, hopefully minimising self esteem and mental health issues. It can also help the parents and wider family understand and accept the child. I'm pursuing a diagnosis for my child for all those reasons.

As PPs have pointed out, in many areas a referral has to go through the school (due to the amount of supporting evidence required) so there's absolutely no point telling the OP to just go to the GP (as if it was that easy!) or that her child is her responsibility, not the school's. If parents can't afford to pay £££ for private assessments, what are they supposed to do if the school is dismissing their concerns?! As stated in the post I'm quoting, it takes a lot of confidence, assertive and persistence to keep pushing school when they're not interested. (I'm doing it myself).

OP, my advice is to contact your local SENDIASS, that's what I've done and I've found them helpful so far. If I were you I would focus on pursuing further assessments (for autism, dyslexia etc) to ensure you identify everything before considering any kind of complaint.

I'm confused as to why you want to complain about the school and not the GP. GP's don't need anything from schools to refer, you should have gone back again and again until they agreed to refer and taken the reports that said she was constantly distracted etc. Schools are not responsible for diagnosing SEN, they told you the issues but if she was so good at masking that she was always well behaved then what did you expect them to do? NICE guidelines say that schools should not be screening for ADHD anyway, I agree though that more dyslexia screening should be done in schools, particularly as it is not available on the NHS.

To me your daughter's behaviour sounds exactly like my sons - sensory issues, difficulty with eye contact and can't filter out distractions, in another world. He was diagnosed with ASD though. I'm really surprised that she's been diagnosed with ADHD not ASD when no one has ever noticed that she was hyperactive. I assume her sleep must be poor and she must be in constant movement, tapping her feet etc? Otherwise how did they come to that conclusion? Has she seen someone that specialises in diagnosing ADHD? It just seems to me that she fits ASD better - but perfectly possible that she has both.

Statistically there is a high possibility that she has both ASD and ADHD.

Similar situation here with autism diagnoses . Though she masked at school. I could drop her off following a panic/anxiety attacks and she walk in completely ok.

We had thankfully the support of the GP - but the forms the school completed they had a very different experience of her in school. So I do understand it’s a rock and hard place! I don’t blame the school, we didn’t even pick it up it was the counselling that directed us that way.

No, I do understand that diagnosis can really help a person. I particularly understand this as an adult with a diagnosis that helps me understand myself.

My point was that (at least in my local authority), schools want to support families to get diagnoses, but are given ridiculous hurdles to jump through.

I don't doubt that some teachers don't understand SEND, especially when it doesn't present typically. And I don't doubt that some teachers make statements about children that are untrue and unhelpful.

But my experience is of seeing children and talking to parents and knowing that a diagnosis could support them, and being told repeatedly by CAMHS that we need to try more within school before they'll even accept a referral.

You wouldn't get nothing from it. ADHD typically is diagnosed later in girls than in boys. They say girls mask it better. It more than likely hasn't been intentionally ignored by the school