AIBU to practice the piano

[TooTiredToWork]

I started learning the piano during lockdown - initially on an electric keyboard and when I passed my Grade 4 I treated myself to a proper piano. I have absolutely loved learning an instrument and feel I am doing quite well - preparing for my Grade 5 and playing some grade 6 and even 7 pieces

The problem is my DW doesn’t like me practicing too much. Because obviously the piano doesn’t have headphones and it’s in the living room where the TV is. She likes watching TV most of the evening. At present we have negotiated 10min a day, which doesn’t feel nearly enough. Mainly I practice when she’s out - but work schedules mean that’s not too often

I know she doesn’t really like classical music (which is mostly what I play) but AIBU to ask if I can play a bit more?

PS - I sold the keyboard to help fund the piano. So that’s not an option

She is unreasonable. I have vocal lessons and practice for an hour 5 or 6 times a week. 10 minutes would be just enough time to warm up and practice a few scales.

We bought DD a new piano a couple of years ago with a silent option. Well worth while!

Well done you! Such a shame your wife doesn't feel the same and that you feel like you're the only one who needs to compromise.

I'd forget getting an electric piano. It would be much cheaper to get your wife some good noise cancelling headphones to Bluetooth to the tv/radio etc.

Another vote for noise cancelling headphones - I wouldn’t be without mine now.

She's being unreasonable. An hour a day practice seems fair to me. I assume she is watching TV for more than 10 mins a day!

YANBU. Stick with an hour a day - ask DW to do something else then, or buy her noise cancelling headphones that she can watch TV with.

I’m in awe of you. I started learning recently - it’s so hard! I really like it, but I doubt very much I’ll be at grade 5 within 3 years!! Stick with it.

Which Electrics did you try?

Yamaha CVP700 and 800 series are incredibly close to piano like. Or alternatively they do an acoustic which i believe mutes the strings and gives you a headphone socket.

The Yamaha Smart one is very good for learning with too, superb app. But cheaper but action is slightly less piano like.

Can't she just watch TV on a laptop in another room while you practise for a little while each day?

Congrats on your progress, but I have to ask - why didn't you both discuss the logistics of getting a piano before you bought it?

Obviously, a real piano is far superior than a digital one for playability and tone, etc, but under the circumstances, a decent Clavinova would suit your needs much better and would have given you so many more hours of sheer joy than an upright that you're barely allowed to play.

I think it’s Yamaha who do a real acoustic upright with an electric piano built in.
Essentially it’s both. There’s an extra pedal that mutes the keys completely and then you plug in headphones and switch on the electric piano function.

Agree with the others. Talk to your wife so you can both spend an equal amount of time doing something you enjoy.

Having said that, it’s actually pretty funny how everyone has jumped to OP’s defence because it’s their partner who is complaining about the noise, not a neighbour. On other similar threads, posters are always quick to suggest calling the council and logging a complaint as Sarah’s 8 year old who lives three detached doors down has dared practise her flute for 15 minutes before dinner.

Look up ´silent piano’ and ´hybrid piano’ two different things but either would probably work in your situation.

Why can't she wear headphones to watch TV while you practise?

You can have a silent system retrofitted on your piano which work pretty well with noise cancelling headphones or even better, your DW can watch Tv on an iPad in her bedroom…
your problem is so 1990s

My DS is an accomplished pianist and practices a lot. He needs to do c 45mins to an hour a day and our upright is in the open plan living space. He can only practice in evenings as at school.
Tbh it did get a little annoying. I love to hear him play but when you get to a good level it can be learning a bar at a time over and over again and it's repetitive for everyone else. And scales. Yuck....
We bought him a good quality second hand yamaha digital piano which he has in his room. He loves it. He says the touch is good and in reality every piano you play is always slightly different in tone and feel. He plays even more now.
He still plays the upright and I love to hear it but I also love hearing the digital piano through the floor whilst still being able to cook with pointless on!!
Open plan living has its drawbacks.

That’s nuts - you should be allowed an hour a day I think. NB - it’s practise and practising with an s ( unless you’re referring to the thing itself as piano practice).

your problem is so 1990s

This is such a mad issue to be having - like "this is literally the only room in the house with an outside TV aerial cable running from the wall so this is the Officially Designated TV Room of the House"...who is still having this conversation nowadays?!?

Could she listen with just one ear?

Your DW is being unreasonable.

Keep your piano - digital ones are just not the same at all.

Perhaps she could spend 45 minutes to an hour a day in another room removing the stick from her butt while you practice

Maybe we are rather old-fashioned! We still have a proper TV on the living room wall. So that’s the TV room!

I voted that YANBU to want to practice for a much longer period at a time, but I do think you both should have discussed this before you bought the piano (or the house).
I don't understand people's desire for following the fashion for open plan living - and this is one of the key reasons. People who live in the same house don't always want to do the same thing at the same time. The fact you didn't think about it when choosing your home, and then the fact it is you that wants to change the way you have been living, does need some discussion, not an automatic assumption the other partner wants to change what they are doing.

And I did have a couple of years lessons as a kid and I sing. So it’s not totally new to me - and so my progress is a little less impressive!

My husband plays the piano for an hour an day-any less would be next door to useless.
If she really cannot find something else to occupy herself for 45 minutes in the evening, then you and she have a bigger problem than how long you practise for.
If she can't turn off the tv for 45 minutes, then what is stopping her getting ear defenders or watching on her laptop for this very limited period of time.? have you asked her? What does she say?
I agree too about the crazy fashion for open plan living which leads to situations like this.

A fellow pianist here with my DH finding my acoustic piano too loud. I do have a top of the range Yamaha electric piano. It is still not the same as a cheap acoustic.
Can you negotiate for 45min a day when she is not busy? DH watches TV and I don't. Get organised and set out a timetable on who can use the living room.
I have been playing since I was a child. DH just does not like it. I threatened to pick up the violin again. Tell her to count herself lucky that you are learning to play the piano instead of violin. The first few yr of violin learning can be a torture to the audience.

Yes to an electric piano with headphones for you or wireless headphones for your wife to watch the TV.