My girlfriend has a weird same sex friendship

[holdituo]

First time posting on here as need some opinions.

I have known my girlfriend for years but she has always been in relationships - we have a mutual interest and been friends and then in the last 6 months have got together. Relationship is all going well and very happy.

I am a straight male and I think she would say she is bisexual. She has had a relationship with a woman in the past.

My question and reasoning for stating this is that she has a strange relationship with one of her female friends which I find uncomfortable. They have been friends a while and are quite close, this girl is always texting her. My girlfriend says the other girl is straight but just likes to test the boundaries and flirts with her. The friend sends my girlfriend flirtatious messages including pictures (not nudes but similar). My girlfriend just says they have a weird relationship and it's always been like that, but nothing has ever happened between them. This girl regularly comes round to my girlfriend's house and sleeps in her bed (even though she has a spare room).

Is this normal and AIBU to tell my girlfriend that it's not and I'd rather this girl wasn't sleeping in her bed and flirting with her?

I feel that if it was a male friend doing these things, I would be justified in having a problem with it, but because they are both female I am made to feel it is not problematic.

Sorry if this post is not very clear, happy to answer any questions.

No it’s not normal ! Testing the boundaries , what about your boundaries??

I personally wouldn't be happy with this. You need to explain what you dont feel comfortable with and set boundaries.

Come on mate. Your girlfriend is bisexual, is receiving nudes or similar from a woman and regularly sleeps in the same bed as her? She's either cheating on you or keeping her options open.

Your post is a bit unclear. The not-nudes-nudes, are they taken to try and be 'sexy'? I've sent my bffs pictures with my boobs in before but they're not sexy at all, there is usually a reason that they are in the photo but I can't think of an example.

And the flirty texts, what is she saying?

It may also depend on your age, at 20 - 25 it wouldn't be uncommon for me to share a bed with a close female friend after a night out but I wouldn't do that now that I'm in my 30s.

Nope. Wouldnt stand for it. Very very wrong and I'd be inclined to think that she's using her friend being "straight" as an excuse to get away with what is clearly inappropriate behaviour.
You shouldn't be feeling like this only 6 months in.
Plenty more fish in the sea my friend!

I am bi and female, with a very close, also bi, also female friend. We sometimes "flirt", but always is a very silly, over-the-top way, which clearly isn't a serious thing. We've never sent each other sexy photos, or shared a bed (certainly wouldn't if there was another option available). I think female friendships (where there are no sexual feelings) can certainly be different, and closer in some ways, than your typical male friendships (weeing in the same cubicle, sharing clothes, chatting more etc). However, what you're describing does still sound a bit extra.

I think the most important factor is that you feel uncomfortable with it - if you are in a relationship with someone, they should take on board your feelings to some extent, so long as you're not being excessively jealous or possessive (which it doesn't sound like you are being). With the girl I sometimes joke about with, I know my OH isn't threatened or upset by it - he'd tell me if he was and I'd respect what he was saying.

The fact is, you can say 'I'm not ok with her sharing a bed with you'. And she should respect that. Because it's not an unreasonable request. And she should want you, her partner, to feel like your feelings are listened to and respected.