To have removed iPads from the home completely.

[AlwaysGoingBackwards]

Name changed and feeling a bit vulnerable after another battle between my 2 DC.

9 and 6. Usual pre Christmas silliness but the back chat and rudeness we get from both of them is totally unacceptable when we are trying to discipline them. The phrases they use when they argue aren’t ones we use. The attitude is disgusting and, frankly, I’m ashamed of what a bad job we’ve done with them so far.

We monitor their iPad use, have YouTube kids and parental locks etc but hand on heart, we do leave them to it for maybe an hour when we need to get things done.

DH is a huge techie and Apple fan. I’m not so much. I know iPads aren’t responsible for raising our children but at the moment I cannot see one positive thing about our DC having them. They can do Numbots, Rockstars etc on the PC.

AIBU for removing them completely from our house?

No, never had them in the house!

I don’t yabu however sometimes balance is needed rather than an extreme approach which may be hard to maintain, in the long run. How about a daily limit? Eg half hour each.

Do you mean even removing adults devices?

Yabu to blame technology for your children's poor behaviour.

Every child at our school is provided with an iPad, if your theory was correct the whole school would be I chaos.

Could you uninstall YouTube kids?

I think actual TV shows on prime or netflix are better

It's not the iPads it's what they're watching. You tube had a seriously detrimental affect on my kids' behaviour. It was easier to delete it than try and police it. They still use the iPads but taking you tube away has removed the battle.

Ha - I may have the only nine year old on the planet who has an iPad but never watches you tube.

Spoiler - he's sometimes a complete arse.

I take it off him if he's pushed his luck too much with his behaviour. He does know why and he is always able to earn it back.

I don't think you are being unreasonable at all. We don't let our kids have phones or iPads as when they do they behave badly. They are four and six. If they want to watch a show they can watch it on the tv.

second those saying remove YouTube. It's not the iPads that is a problem here, it's the drivel they watch.
We have limits on gaming on the iPad (which is only allowed at weekends) and educational games are always allowed. No YouTube or safari except allowed websites.

I don’t really see the link in your op? Your kids are rude and backchat so you will remove all iPads? What do you think the link is there?

To me it reads like you want to lash out/punish them, but I feel like that’s slightly lazy parenting, looking for a ‘quick fix.’ Oh if I take the iPads/ban Horrid Henry/stop giving them squash my kids will suddenly behave well. But I think (unless their behaviour is directly linked to whatever they do on the iPad) it’s unlikely to work.

YANBU

why do such young DC need iPads?

ours are 6,9,11, no iPads. The 11 year old only got a phone last month

surely they have toys to play with to use their imaginations, books, crafts etc ?

My 4 year old uses "phrases we don't use". He gets them from the other children at nursery. 🤨

Every child at DS2’s school has an iPad from year 3 above so there would be a big problem if we banned our DCs from using them. DS2 wouldn’t be able to do most of his homework!!! DS1 used devices from an early age. He designed and built his own PC at 10. Age 12 he usually comes top in computer science at his (super selective) grammar so it doesn’t seem to have done him any harm!

Take them and give them an early night - 99% of the time when mine get like this they are tired and a good 12 sleep does them the world of good. I sent mine to read in their bed at 6.30 pm and I’ve just checked and both are fast asleep … explains why they behaved awfully at 5 pm tiredness and fighting it.

Op just a ‘you are not alone’ reply. Our kids are addicted and we regularly have to police or take away screens. I won’t lie- it works, but it’s teaching them nothing- I don’t know what the solution is, we steer them away with board games, walks, games of football etc, but I feel some children just seem to be hooked! (Once had a birthday party for my teen where half of the guests gave out to the other half for being on their phones/our iPad and told them to get out and play football

How many do you have? I'd kill anyone who tried to remove mine - but these are expensive items I wouldn't expect a 6 and 9 yo to have one each.

It was the best decision we could have made - behaviour dramatically improved once iPads were gone permanently

Gosh at their ages absolutely remove! Reconsider for each when each is secondary aged.

You tube is shite.

Screens are ok for very limited periods with very very careful choice of what's on there.

I think you did the absolutely right thing!

I’ve uninstalled YouTube from our main TV and DS7’s tablet as I was concerned about the change in his behaviour when he’d been watching it. I think it has a really detrimental effect on children’s attention span and ability to concentrate.

DD8 - we removed youtube (so many reasons!) and i have a 'small screen' time limit per day.

'Big screen' (play station games) is included in that time limit.

Films, (Disney ect) is not included in the time limit, but one film and then it gets turned off.

It is a battle. It's not a new battle for me. I have 3 older kids (90s born) and i had to use a crow bar to get them off the PS1 back then!!

We removed them for 3 months from all 4 kids once. It was an interesting and enriching experience for everyone. Behaviour improved massively.

They (tablets etc) don't really seem to contribute effectively to behavior or family life (long - term anyway).

TV does not seem as unsettling for some reason

You Tube is an utter waste of time for them - anyone seen Diana?!!!