Terrified to use the NHS again

[Seasonofthewitch83]

I have never suffered health anxiety before but its developing at a rapid pace and I wonder if anyone has any practical tips?

It started by giving birth during the first lockdown, being dumped alone on a postnatal ward post c section, sweating and in pain clutching a baby. Was not able to reach the alarm, my phone, water.....I didnt want to shout so I sat there silently weeping until a HCA eventually walked past. I think I was in shock.

This was then compounded to the lack of ambulances when the hospitals were becoming overrun and i was terrified of DD getting sick and not being able to quickly get to hospital. I have about 5 taxi apps on my phone now.

I was hospitalised last weekend and I do not feel like I am exaggerating when I saw I think I have developed some trauma. I was in intense pain and I felt utterly helpless. Every time I asked for pain relief or for help, I was fobbed off. I hate, hate, HATE the fact I am completely reliant on a staff member (who is overworked and underpaid) taking care of me. Turns out I was not triaged correctly and put to the bottom of the pile with a gallbladder blockage and infection and ended up being admitted for 3 days.

I am petrified of getting ill again. Of DD getting sick. i need to get over it as i now have surgery booked next month.

How do I solve this?

YANBU at all and I have no practical advice because as a PP said, at the end of the day NHS is the default system in the UK and the private sector will re-route you there if needed.

If NHS leadership and government could have a conversation and set out a vision of the health system that isn't either A) US Style System for private profit OR B) everything free at the point of use for everyone then we could get somewhere but it is so polarised between the two positions.

Most countries have functional and accessible insurance based systems. Why we cannot have a sensible conversation about this I don't know.

Hope your op goes well.

And by the way gp's, dentists and pharmacies aren't NHS - they are almost all private profit making businesses who have a contract with the NHS to provide services (including most out patient pharmacies in hospital)

I used to judge people who went to A&E with non-emergencies. But after waiting three weeks to even get a phone appointment for my DC (not an emergency but 111 still said to visit GP), I'm not surprised. What are you supposed to do when you can't get a GP appointment?

I used to be very pro the NHS but my last few experiences have left me afraid of it.

Yanbu and going private won’t help in an emergency.

i had to drive Dd to the hospital with a suspected heart attack at the weekend (she has a medical condition making her high risk for heart attacks). Queue up at the first desk patiently waiting for the bloke infront to finish explaining how he’d had a tight chest for a week. I’m having to hold Dd up, she’s sobbing and vomiting in pain. Get to talk to the nurse (qualified nurse) and explain Dd has crushing chest pain and is struggling to breath, explain her medical history.

Nurse fills out some paperwork then tells us to queue at the next window to get booked in. Dd collapses at this point so I put her in a chair and go to the next window. I tell this person I think Dd is having a heart attack and she’s like ok, can I confirm your number and gp surgery. Then had to wait ten mins for triage. Dd was sobbing saying she was going to die before anyone saw her.

I don’t blame the staff. The system seems broken though when you can leave someone that seriously ill potentially having a heart attack, struggling to breath and it’s ok to leave them in a seat with no medical care.

I work for the NHS as a researcher but even I am worried about an op I am having next month. I have previously had a terrible experience coming out of general anaesthesia - I had emergence delirium and dystonia that wasn't picked up (ironically by NHS funded private hospital) and was discharged mute and in a physiological and psychological mess. I have asked for my hysterectomy to be via spinal as I am so worried about GA but have been fobbed off.

Apparently the surgeon prefers GA as it might have to go to open from laparoscopic, when I asked why we can't start with spinal and if it needs to go to open we can do GA, I didn't get a response. I also want to keep my ovaries and again have been told that the surgeon prefers to take the ovaries. I have sent NICE guidelines and research papers but got no response. I can advocate strongly for myself but even I am feeling a bit cowed - there seems to be little collaboration between patients and HCP's in their care. I don't know why being left to experience pain, self care and anxiety is seen as a normal part of healthcare delivery? Surely it's better for everyone to work with patients?

Oh, how terrifying and frustrating. Surely there needs to be a better system for this kind of scenario.

@CoffeeBoy

So inhumane with little dignity. 😢

In my expereince it's a postcode lottery. Not that it should be, of course.

Therapy. Check with you employers- they may have an employee assistance program which can provide X number of hours therapy. Also online therapy is an option and often more convenient when you have child care issues. I have private Healthcare through work - for the last 7 years or so and have been unable to use it - so many exclusions! I have paid privately for therapy and you can agree to limit the number of sessions . Good luck!

I’m afraid that was my thought. PTSD has to be carefully diagnosed by a professional according to set criteria.

Telling someone it is easily treatable can be very harmful and very misleading. Personally speaking I have gone through years of various therapies, involving various mental health professionals, alternative therapies and learned from every book I could find on the subject.and 99.9% of the time no one would ever know. Certain things can still really trigger it. I personally don’t think most cases can be 100% cured. You can learn to manage it, but it takes a lot of work, you might think you’re fine then suddenly wham a flashback. From what I’ve heard Anecdotally EMDR is great but often can have relapses. This was my experience (CBT is useless for me, talking therapy helped give me strength to deal with it)

if therapy doesn’t work and you’re told it’s works for everyone- this can add to feelings of failure and hopelessness.

I have got Benenden health cover now, it is supposed to work with the NHS so if long waiting lists etc, also covers some operations which they would leave you with for ages on NHS (not all) This is helping me a little, it is £11 a month.

Recently had an ultrasound and MRI with this within a month, waiting lists for the NHS were 16 months and 18 months for each.