Why are people so obsessed with body shape?

[dearohdeary]

I've noticed on a daily occurrence people make comments to others about their body! My sister is 4 foot 11 and gets she's a doll etc. I'm 5 foot 3 and get oh I didn't realise you were so small!
My friend and her partner are over 6 foot and they're called giants by people.
I've overheard people in work commenting on others attributes too
Aibu to think it's so rude?

How misleading. I thought you meant apple shape, hourglass shape...etc not about height! MN seems to have a height thread every day.
People comment on everything or at least think it when they meet someone they will think: oh he's hot! Wow she's tall, God her hair is fab! Some are filtered and so restrain themselves from blurting things out and some aren't they just word vomit and say whatever they think. Some think they're complimenting you or creating rapport. Everyone gets some sort of a comment, positive or negative about their looks and bodies. It's not just you and your tiny doll sis.

Yes it’s quite annoying. When I was dating men used to comment on my tallness all the time. I used to try to not let it make me feel self conscious but it was tricky. A lot of people comment on how tall
my dc are as well

So many people think it's ok to say to someone of normal bodyweight that they are "skinny", too. So rude. I even had a facilities manager at work come to my desk and tell me in front of all my colleagues that I wouldn't be cold if I "ate a bit more and put on a few pounds". I eat lots. This is just my body shape. I had been asked by my boss to send an email on behalf of the team to inform her the heating was broken. And her reaction was to humiliate me. My colleagues looked uncomfortable but said nothing. I am certain if I'd replied "well you might sweat less if you lose a few pounds" I'd have been hauled up for disciplinary action, but somehow people let what she said to me - which is the exact equivalent - pass.

Nobody needs to make such comments. It's hurtful and unnecessary and really unkind.

My friend’s husband is 6’8”, you can imagine how many people say ‘you’re tall!’ He always says ‘am I? Thanks, I didn’t know that I just thought you were really short!’

It's not even height. It's body shape too. Like people who tell others they've put weight on, have short legs, fat arse etc

It’s down to natural selection/sexual attraction. But yes, it is rude.
I think the younger generation are much better at body positivity than us.

Of course its bloody odd. Do you go up to strangers to helpfully inform them: "you've got brown hair" or "You're wearing glasses" or, "You have a beard"- if not, why not?- because it would make you look like a twat pointing out the flipping obvious, thats why. Its the SAME with height- dont you think people already realise how tall they are? or do you assume its going to come to them as a helpful realisation from a kindly stranger because they had wondered how tall or short they were since childhood but noone had bothered to tell them?! Good grief.

It's not uncommon but it's still odd. Fastest way to make someone dislike you is to comment on their looks/a feature their insecure about

Ie. Calling a tall person a giant or infantilising a short person

So yes, it is odd.

I agree. I’ve lost weight recently (weight is often up and down due to stress) and I always get comments that ‘I’m not eating enough,’ ‘afraid of food,’ ‘getting too skinny’
for reference I’m 5.9 and about 56kgs between a size 8-10. I’m slim but not skinny. I eat what I want when I want but some days I don’t feel like eating much. It’s irritating. I would never comment on someone being ‘bigger’.

Oh I also get ‘you’re always cold because you have no fat’ ‘need to change my butcher’ etc (eye roll)

It's rude and tactless for people to be commenting on how short you and your sister are.

Is it?

How would that explain the woman at work who was so rude to me in front of my colleagues, as I explained above?

I'm pretty sure she isn't sexually attracted to me. 🤣 So why did she feel the need to come and make personal comments about my figure in front of my colleagues just because I sentan email on behalf of my team that the heating was broken, after my boss requested that I do so?

There are many more examples of this. I was bullied in several schools as a teenager for being slim.

It's not ok.

Great comeback!

I agree. Unless it’s intended as an obvious compliment I don’t know why anyone would comment on someone’s (esp a stranger) size, height, body shape or appearance in general. I’m 5’10”. When people tell me I’m tall I just assume they are a bit dim and are lacking in social skills if the most imaginative thing they can say is to comment on something so ridiculously obvious. It’s the kind of thing a child would say.

Observations are one thing - we can't help those, comments rude.

I know! Was very disappointed with their range when looking for gifts this year. Seemed very overpriced too.
The man at the till was ever so tall though.

Body shape or height? You've only given examples of height....
Your post title is misleading.

Absolutely. I am 5'11" and and 60kg. Healthy weight per the BMI calculator. And yet people want to use derogatory terms like "thin" or "skinny". It's as unacceptable as walking up to someone and saying "hey fattie!"

Just why would anybody do that?

She have examples of height but most people realise it's not ok for height either, is it?

It’s pretty darned amazing the variety of shapes and sized humans come in. I’m not one to comment to others generally. But last week at the university track a young fellow was training, amazing to see BUT he was short, dh said, if he was 6’ tall we would all know his name.
point, people notice size and shape.

point, people notice size and shape

Oh I totally agree. We all have an inner dialogue and of course you notice people’s physical characteristics, that’s normal. I might think lots of things in my head but not every thought needs to be said out loud is the point.

Why?

I mean if he was training in running them obviously as a short person he has a disadvantage he can never overcome. So it depends on specialism. But presumably if he's serious about training in something (for competitive reasons rather than just for himself) he'll have picked something where his body-type doesn't rule him out from ever being a competitor? And if just training for his own enjoyment, then why would anyone else's recognition be relevant?

My best friend is 5-3 and I call her shorty…mainly because I’m 5-10 and jealous always wanted to be shorter.

I can't say I've noticed this particularly. People may comment on occasion, but not usually about traits percieved as negative. So men may be told they're tall, but not short. Women that they're slim, but not fat. Mostly people think they're being complimentary, as men tend to like being tall and women tend to like being slim. Certainly I wouldn't see it as an obsession.

I always get comments on my boobs. I worked with one woman who was always asking me what size they were and telling me how much she wanted big boobs. I bloody hated it.