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AIBU?

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Original poster

Why are some dog owners so bloody selfish

126 replies

goldenmarshmallow · 17/12/2022 22:29

Sorry- rant incoming.

I am sick to the back TEETH of some dog owners who think it’s acceptable to put their dog with no recall or training off the lead and to let it run up to anyone and everyone.

I have a golden who is generally good with dogs but gets very boisterous and excitable with some, which comes out as her being reactive. She doesn’t bite or show any aggression but she bounces and growls and tries to rough play. We’re doing training atm to work on her reactiveness and recall. She gets off lead time with other dogs that we know she gets on with (friends/family) but only in our family’s land/hired dog fields etc so she’s not off lead around the public as her recall isn’t reliable. I don’t let her meet other dogs on walks as she is too unpredictable. So, I keep her on the lead away from dogs we don’t know. But I am so sick of dogs off the lead approaching her, usually with the owner making a half hearted attempt to call the dog back but it just completely ignores them. I shout over ‘can you get your dog away from my dog because she isn’t always friendly!’ to which they usually say, oh he just wants to say hello! Or, don’t worry he’s good with all dogs! I don’t give a shit if your dog wants to say hello, move it away from mine before she barks/growls/lunges and frightens your dog and you start having a go at me

there’s nothing wrong with off lead dogs with good recall, and some dogs come back as soon as they are called which is fantastic, but WHY on earth are some people so bloody selfish? If your dog won’t respond when you call it back, put it on a lead FGS! She’s also scared of some dogs and responds by trying to hide behind me- again, I’ll shout over to the owners that my dog is scared and can they collect their dogs but nope, it’s always just oh don’t worry he’s friendly!

bloody sick of it.

OP posts:
Original poster
goldenmarshmallow · 17/12/2022 22:33

Also, if your dog doesn’t respond to your recall and approaches other dogs, you cannot reliably say it won’t approach a child or person, and you can’t rely on it’s recall if it did approach a child for example.

i would say most, if not every, dog owner has had an unfortunate incidence of letting their obedient dog off the lead, only for them to ignore you/run off/not come back, whatever. But then you put it on the lead after that and do more training. That’s the difference. You don’t just let it continue running off the lead when it’s already shown it has absolutely no recall or obedience

I’ll stop ranting now! It’s just so frustrating.

OP posts:
darkwinterdays · 17/12/2022 22:37

I’ll shout over to the owners

This I have usually found is pointless. You are shouting at the wrong thing.

The dog bounding up to you is 💯 convinced you and your dog will be happy to see it which makes ignoring any recall worthwhile. You need to shout etc at this dog so its experience is unpleasant and it is better off going back its owner, who will now be shouting at you for been 'unfriendly'.

This works for dog owners, runners, walkers etc ...shout at the dog which is approaching, ignore the owner (like the dog is already doing). It thinks you are friendly, show it you are not.

TokyoSushi · 17/12/2022 22:39

I absolutely agree OP! Our dog us fabulous at home but can be unpredictably reactive when out so is always a lead unless there are no other dogs in the vicinity.

The number of dogs that come bounding up to ours with absolutely zero recall is infuriating. And then of course when ours barks or growls at lovely Teddy (often a Teddy) who is all over ours, you're the one in the wrong!!!

UrsulaPandress · 17/12/2022 22:39

I walk with a crutch. I find shouting and waving my crutch at incoming dogs can do the trick.

Zanatdy · 17/12/2022 22:40

This drives me mad too. Mine is anxious of big dogs and it causes so much stress if a big dog charges at him. Some owners apologise and get the dog quickly, and I always say no problem, but some are downright rude and obnoxious

PurpleSproutingSomething · 17/12/2022 22:40

Gah, I was in Aldi earlier and a bloke had a dachshund on one of those long extendable leads and it was obviously oh so funny that this dog kept running around people and the lead was everywhere and the bloke was having a chat with his partner/friend by the veg aisle.

It then barked for about a minute by the checkouts and they got asked to leave.

It all seemed very contrived. I bet it has no recall skills either. Certainly didn't on a Saturday afternoon in a supermarket just before Christmas!

vodkaredbullgirl · 17/12/2022 22:41

🙄

Original poster
goldenmarshmallow · 17/12/2022 22:42

darkwinterdays · 17/12/2022 22:37

I’ll shout over to the owners

This I have usually found is pointless. You are shouting at the wrong thing.

The dog bounding up to you is 💯 convinced you and your dog will be happy to see it which makes ignoring any recall worthwhile. You need to shout etc at this dog so its experience is unpleasant and it is better off going back its owner, who will now be shouting at you for been 'unfriendly'.

This works for dog owners, runners, walkers etc ...shout at the dog which is approaching, ignore the owner (like the dog is already doing). It thinks you are friendly, show it you are not.

Sorry, when I first read your comment I misread it and thought you meant it works to stop runners and walkers too- I was laughing so much at the idea of shouting over at people just helplessly running past 😂

OP posts:
Original poster
goldenmarshmallow · 17/12/2022 22:42

vodkaredbullgirl · 17/12/2022 22:41

🙄

What?

OP posts:
Original poster
goldenmarshmallow · 17/12/2022 22:44

Zanatdy · 17/12/2022 22:40

This drives me mad too. Mine is anxious of big dogs and it causes so much stress if a big dog charges at him. Some owners apologise and get the dog quickly, and I always say no problem, but some are downright rude and obnoxious

Yep that’s our experience too. The ones that apologise and collect the dog are usually fine (although still frustrating but at least they are trying to help) but the ones that look at you like you have 2 heads because you asked them to collect their dog- argh! So bloody selfish.

OP posts:
vodkaredbullgirl · 17/12/2022 22:45

Sorry my dogs distracted me, 1 of my dogs hides behind us when another dog comes running up.

GuyFawkesDay · 17/12/2022 22:45

So annoying. I've trained mine to wait by me whilst others go past on pavements etc. We do the same in open spaces. He has to wait by me and oncei have permission he knows what "go say hi" means and then will approach other dogs

Original poster
goldenmarshmallow · 17/12/2022 22:45

TokyoSushi · 17/12/2022 22:39

I absolutely agree OP! Our dog us fabulous at home but can be unpredictably reactive when out so is always a lead unless there are no other dogs in the vicinity.

The number of dogs that come bounding up to ours with absolutely zero recall is infuriating. And then of course when ours barks or growls at lovely Teddy (often a Teddy) who is all over ours, you're the one in the wrong!!!

Yep exactly. Even when you warn them and they say ‘oh its fine!’ then when your dog barks/lunges (just like you warned would happen) they look at you like it’s your fault! FGS!

OP posts:
Whyisitsodifficult · 17/12/2022 22:46

A dog in Aldi!?

vodkaredbullgirl · 17/12/2022 22:46

My lab is more concerned when another dog pinches her ball.

XenoBitch · 17/12/2022 22:47

YANBU
I have a dog, and we have gone to a park and found ourselves ambushed by "friendly" dogs. My dog gets freaked out, and decides to take herself home.

PurpleSproutingSomething · 17/12/2022 22:50

Whyisitsodifficult · 17/12/2022 22:46

A dog in Aldi!?

I know! It was so busy none of the staff seemed to notice. Until it started barking.

Pugdogmom · 17/12/2022 22:52

I hear ya OP. I've got a small reactive dog that is scared of big dogs as he got attacked by an off lead dog. He's getting so much better because of the work I have put into him, and he is never off lead unless in an enclosed field or there are no other dogs around in our local field. He does have good recall and likes to pooter about sniffing when he's off lead. If I see another dog, he gets recalled and put on.
And yet other dog owners think it's ok to let their " friendly " dogs run up to him on lead and as soon as he starts barking I get " oh he's got small dog syndrome ". No he doesn't, he doesn't like your rude, ill mannered dog in his face and he's telling it in doggy language to fuck off.

Screwcorona · 17/12/2022 23:03

I'm fed up to op. I've not got a dog, but my son is uncomfortable with dogs. So many times ones come bouncing up to "say hello" and it's made him anxious of going to the beach and a local beauty spot since it happens so much.

I'm trying to help him to learn to keep calm but he's afraid, and often the dog is already in his face before the owners anywhere near. He climbs up me screaming. Dog gets all excitable and it's a bloody nightmare.

xyhere · 17/12/2022 23:06

Yes, absolutely. We have two dogs - an Akita and a Chihuahua. They're a bonded pair, completely inseparable, so we have to walk them together (always on leads). Our Akita is the most chill, respectful dog we've ever had, but she does insist on some formality when meeting other dogs. If the other dogs are rude, she'll generally just ignore them and walk away.

We're always having problems with other people's off-leash dogs who are basically out of control, though - their dogs are snapping and hassling ours, so my wife always grabs the Chihuahua in her arms and I'm left fending off multiple dogs in the full knowledge that if one of them even looks like they're realistically going to attack me, our Akita is going to (rightly) rip them a new one.

But then...I'm also fully aware that if an Akita injures another dog, it's the Akita that gets put down and then they ask questions about the other dog.

So here we are - I'm fending off dogs and yelling to the owners that their dog is causing problems and could be at risk, and they inevitably come sauntering up into earshot and then start acting like our dog's the dangerous one when she's by my side and doing nothing but giving "go away" signals. So many goddamn times I've been threatened with calling the police, because these idiots can't believe that their angel of a dog is the one picking a fight because of their complete failure to be responsible owners.

Dammit, I was having a really chill night, and I'm angry again now :D

Minimalme · 17/12/2022 23:08

I've found since lockdown there are more reactive dogs on leads and owners which seem unconfident around dogs.

My dogs are well trained with excellent recall and are well socialised. The are also old enough not to get excited at every dogs they meet.

I would love separate fields for dogs in lead and off lead.

JonahAndTheSnail · 17/12/2022 23:14

It's shit OP. We've had an older reactive greyhouud rescue for the past 9 years (he must be at least 16 now). When we first got him (he'd spent half his life in kennels) he was massively reactive to other dogs. He's always been muzzled on walks with a bright yellow muzzle since we rehomed him from Dog's Trust. We've always been open with other dog owners that he has a tendency to be vocal with other dogs/ and we don't want to pass his bad habits on/ so we'll give you space to pass us.

With lots of training, he's basically a big softie now and will only bark if another dog has been looking at him for too long or tried to approach him. He's basically non reactive. A couple of years back we had a family with two young pups in tow deliberately pass us making barking noises to wind up their dogs to snarl at our dog. The result was our dog slipped his harness (first and only time he has ever done this) and try to run into a main road. I managed to recall my dog to safety and yell at the morons to put their dogs on a lead, but they looked at me like I had two heads as their dogs ran into oncoming traffic!

Original poster
goldenmarshmallow · 17/12/2022 23:17

Minimalme · 17/12/2022 23:08

I've found since lockdown there are more reactive dogs on leads and owners which seem unconfident around dogs.

My dogs are well trained with excellent recall and are well socialised. The are also old enough not to get excited at every dogs they meet.

I would love separate fields for dogs in lead and off lead.

Maybe. My dog isn’t a lockdown dog though and I’ve had dogs for decades so I’m pretty experienced. She’s been well trained and socialised and is still being trained at the moment. Some dogs are just naturally more reactive than others for whatever reason, sometimes it’s a bad experience as a pup etc.

OP posts:
Sugargliderwombat · 17/12/2022 23:18

Yes ! I had my newborn in a sling a few days ago and 2 separate dogs came bounding over, ignoring their owner whilst jumping up and barking. It's obvious I had a baby in a sling why the f didn't they properly try to recall their dogs?

Original poster
goldenmarshmallow · 17/12/2022 23:21

goldenmarshmallow · 17/12/2022 23:17

Maybe. My dog isn’t a lockdown dog though and I’ve had dogs for decades so I’m pretty experienced. She’s been well trained and socialised and is still being trained at the moment. Some dogs are just naturally more reactive than others for whatever reason, sometimes it’s a bad experience as a pup etc.

Show quote history

Oh and I’m not unconfident around dogs, but that doesn’t mean I appreciate strange dogs running up to my dog and their owner not bothering to even try and control them. Having said that, I wouldn’t blame others for being unconfident around dogs that approach other dogs/people and are not under control by their owner!

OP posts: