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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not get younger brother a Christmas present

6 replies

Volumous · 17/12/2022 11:45

My younger brother (28) hasn't spoken to me since last Christmas. We've never been especially close but we had a shock family bereavement in late 2020, and I regularly messaged him last year to check how he was. Not once did he contact me or ask how I was doing though. I saw him at Christmas last year and everything was fine (except for his contant boasting and bigging himself up and little interest in anything or anyone else). I've just left things this year and unsurprisingly I've not heard a peep out of him.

I can't be bothered to get him and his partner presents this Christmas. I won't be seeing them over Christmas, and won't be seeing them next Christmas either as I'm away, so probably won't speak to them for at least another 2 years now. But my mum just sent me a list of ideas for presents for them, including some £50ish household items. I've said no presents all round but she thinks I should get them something because they're hard up! (Their household income is around £60-70k, no kids, and my brother is sitting on £100k of inheritance money, so they're hardly on the breadline). Aibu to just not get them anything?

OP posts:
lobsterkiller · 17/12/2022 11:54

Why would you? He's not bothered and times are hard for most of us.

I have three nieces, one of them doesn't bother with anyone except at Christmas (she likes receiving gifts.) Doesn't even get anyone a card, doesn't say thank you and she's a similar age.

I felt mean for a long time, but trust me it'll pass.

Comedycook · 17/12/2022 11:56

I wouldn't get them a gift

Schnooze · 17/12/2022 11:58

I wouldn’t.

MillyMollyManky · 17/12/2022 12:00

Yanbu. I’d just reply that you’re cutting down on presents this year (for COL/green reasons or no reason, whatever) so won’t be buying for your brother and won’t be expecting anything from him.

poefaced · 17/12/2022 12:03

Don’t get either of them a thing. Your mum is deluded. Has she sent him a list if things for you?

AdInfinitum12 · 17/12/2022 12:17

Has she sent a list to your brother with gifts for you? I'd guess probably not.

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