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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think I'm the only one...

14 replies

itsallgettingonmytitsnow · 16/12/2022 21:29

Ok so I am full time working mum to a young DC.
I work x3 days WFH and x2 days field based (sometimes it's the opposite way around).
FH.. yes I purposely used F in place of D because at the moment he is Fucking Husband, not Dear or Darling Husband!

My daily routine.. wake up, feed DC, wash and dress DC, wash and dress myself. Drop DC at childcare. Work. Fetch DC, feed family. Wash up, do wash loads/dry loads. Bath DC, bottle DC and then get DC to bed. Have 1hr to myself (if not ironing or doing other chores), then go to sleep. And repeat.

FH routine.. get up, go work (manual worker), come back, bath, eat, play xbox or sit on phone watching YouTube all night. Sleep. Repeat.

If I so much as ask FH to help me round the house. I get... "you sit down for a job. I am constantly on my feet. How many steps did you do today? I did 17,000 how many were yours?" By this time I have left the room and am doing said job that I'd asked for help with. Whilst grinding my teeth, and clenching my fists and wishing I'd never fucking asked and just shut up and got on with it anyway....

Aibu to think I am alone here or are there other arsehole FH out there who do this!?!?!?

OP posts:
Dotcheck · 16/12/2022 21:32

Have you asked him if he genuinely feels that you don’t deserve time off, and if he wants his children to grow knowing that their father considers them a chore?

panko · 16/12/2022 21:34

What would he do if you died?

Original poster
itsallgettingonmytitsnow · 16/12/2022 21:38

panko · 16/12/2022 21:34

What would he do if you died?

Fuck knows my DM would probably raise DC.
Hopefully.

OP posts:
DumpIing · 16/12/2022 21:41

Hope you’re doubling-up on the contraception.

panko · 16/12/2022 21:41

itsallgettingonmytitsnow · 16/12/2022 21:38

Fuck knows my DM would probably raise DC.
Hopefully.

Show quote history

Genuinely worth having that discussion.

underneaththeash · 16/12/2022 21:45

You sit down and come up with a rota and tell him. You are picking up on xx

LocalHobo · 16/12/2022 21:45

Well you have enabled this pattern of behaviour...
In answer to your question, no I don't know any couples who behave in this way.

girlmom21 · 16/12/2022 21:46

What are the weekends like?

justcouldntthinkofausername · 16/12/2022 21:49

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 16/12/2022 21:51

You stop doing anything for him- and go out at the weekend leaving him with the kids for a couple of hours.

justcouldntthinkofausername · 16/12/2022 21:52

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

catandcoffee · 16/12/2022 21:53

Do a pros and cons list of what he brings to the relationship.

That should give you a clearer picture.

Original poster
itsallgettingonmytitsnow · 16/12/2022 21:54

catandcoffee · 16/12/2022 21:53

Do a pros and cons list of what he brings to the relationship.

That should give you a clearer picture.

I'm back 🤚🏻
Good idea Cats 👏🏻
Thanks

OP posts:
Original poster
itsallgettingonmytitsnow · 16/12/2022 21:56

It just really gets on my tits.
Have been reflecting a lot tonight 🤔

OP posts:
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