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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to want to know why someone wants what I'm offering on Freecycle (warning bit of an essay!)

24 replies

Bouncingturtle · 02/02/2008 10:46

I really don't know if I am to be honest.
I have an old pc and a fridge to dispose of. They are surplus to requirements, but in excellent condition, can't be arsed to sell them. The PC is old, works but needs to be upgraded, fan needs replacing etc.
I've had loads of emails for the PC and most people say "I'd like it for my kid, to do homework" or "I like to tinker with PCs" etc., which I'm quite happy with, but some people sent an email to say "I can collect it, so give it to me." No word of why I should pick them over anyone else. I haven't suggested in my post that there is any particular urgency in getting rid of it, to be honest it's been hanging around our lounge gathering dust for months. I had one email saying "I'll have it, send me a photo". I replied saying "I've already offered it to someone, thanks for your interest" (Waiting for them to arrange pick up), so he sends me another email to say "give me your address I'll pick it up".
I replied thusly,
"I've already replied to your first message stating that I have already
offered this pc out to someone!
Frankly I think you are a bit cheeky asking for a photo and asking my
address - you have assumed you would automatically get the PC!"
Just a bit peed off that some of these people act as though they are doing you a favour - I don't give away crap and I want to make sure that anything I do give away goes to someone deserving i live not too far away from a fairly deprived area, so there are plenty of needy people who would be genuinely grateful to receive something like this. (God does that sound a bit patronising? If so apologies!)
As for the fridge I've had some interest in that but no explanations as to why they want it.
Would it be okay to send them the following email?
"Thanks for your interest, I've had a few people email me about this fridge. In the spirit of Freecycle I want to ensure that it goes to someone who is genuinely in need. I would appreciate it if you could explain why you want the fridge so to assist me in making a fair decision as to who gets it".
Or am I being a bit precious?
TIA!

OP posts:

Original poster

Bouncingturtle · 02/02/2008 10:47

I'm also wondering whether I should forget the whole thing and find a charity shop to take these things off my hands... what do you think?

OP posts:

charliecat · 02/02/2008 10:48

I think you are being a little unreasonable. The spirit of freecycle is to keep things out of landfill. Reuse.
So the liar with a sob story gets it over the genuine first person to see it whos doesnt want to tell you that they really do need a fridge as they are piss poor?
First come first served, i think anyway.

pelafina · 02/02/2008 10:50

Message withdrawn

Original poster

Bouncingturtle · 02/02/2008 10:52

I used to do the first come first served thing, but then my local freecycle asked people to use the Fair Use Policy.
Yes, I can see where you are coming from - how can you tell when people are being honest?

OP posts:

charliecat · 02/02/2008 10:54

you cant. You could ask them how close they are to you. Continue with the enviromental theme?

Cappuccino · 02/02/2008 10:54

agree with charliecat

you are not giving the fridge to a charity you are saving it from landfill, as well as saving the energy that goes into making a new fridge as whoever gets it will not need to buy a new one

I just email everyone else with 'sorry but it has already gone'. I certainly wouldn't waste the energy getting into slanging matches with them

ChristmasShinySnowflakes · 02/02/2008 10:54

Thr idea is that when you post you add this in the message you post:

Free to the most deserving/needy person so please state why you need the item in your email.

katylessbumpy · 02/02/2008 10:58

freecycle aaarrrgh.i offered somethings last night.a lady contacted me to say she would like all off them.i split the items and offered her one of them.she replied but i wanted the other one! why didn't she say that.i've now still got my stuff and haven't got a clue if the people i have offered it to want it or not.
i feel your pain.manners cost nothing.i never expect a sob story but people who say i'll have this really get on my wick

Original poster

Bouncingturtle · 02/02/2008 10:59

Thanks for your input guys.
Yes the environmental thing is primary, I always check that people are local.
I won't bother sending the email in that case, and just put it down to experience!

OP posts:

Original poster

Bouncingturtle · 02/02/2008 11:01

Actually I should just ask for a postcode and give it to the closest person!

OP posts:

Bellavita · 02/02/2008 11:07

We usually wait for a few replies to come in and then decide. The people who get first preference are the ones that take off the freecycle bit of the e-mail and get their reply directly to our in box.

wheresthehamster · 02/02/2008 11:11

If you want them to go to a deserving cause try your local voluntary services or try the furniture reuse network they may have a branch near you.

I love freecycle. I don't really care where the stuff goes as long as it's not in my house any more! If someone want to sell it on that's fine. I know I could do the same if only I could be bothered.

If for any reason I don't like the sound of anyone I just apologise and say it's gone.

Original poster

Bouncingturtle · 02/02/2008 11:20

Hamster - excellent idea, and there is a place very close to me, I'll bear this in mind.
Once again thanks all for your thoughts you've been very helpful

OP posts:

BroccoliSpears · 02/02/2008 20:25

I don't understand why people care if things are taken and sold on ebay or car boots. If you can't be bothered to sell it but don't want it hanging around, why not let someone who can be bothered make a few quid from it? It's kept out of landfill and gone to a new owner who wants it, which is the main thing surely?

I think giving should be unconditional. Once it's not mine any more you can do what you like with it. Otherwise you risk giving to the 'poor and needy' to make yourself feel good, which isn't very pretty in my opinion.

DoodleToYou · 02/02/2008 20:28

Message withdrawn

BroccoliSpears · 02/02/2008 20:29

Lol Doodle.

FrannyandZooey · 02/02/2008 20:30

it's fine to choose who you give your stuff to

our freecycle encourages this and advises people wait a day or two for all emails to come in before allocating the stuff, so they can consider requests from charities / schools etc

Original poster

Bouncingturtle · 02/02/2008 21:35

Broccoli - I never thought of that!! I'm if that's how it comes across - but really I'm not like that!
Feel guilty giving something away to someone who simply wants to profiteer when someone else might make better use of it! I'm trying to consider all aspects of giving away stuff IYSWIM.
Crikey - it's no wonder they say the road to hell is paved with good intentions

OP posts:

Wisteria · 02/02/2008 21:39

But someone could write you a wonderful sob story and be lying anyway!

Just get rid - first come, first served. If they can be bothered to post it on ebay and sell it then they obviously need the cash, you're still helping someone - what do you care?

BigBadMouse · 02/02/2008 21:59

I think the more you use your local freecycle, the more aware you become of who you want your items to go to. I don't think there is anything wrong in picking who your items go to. My local site has the fairness policy too (you say you will wait 24 hours before offering) exactly for this purpose of being able to choose. Most of the time I wait for 24 hours to allow for those who are unable to check their email all the time, sometimes it goes to whoever replies first just so I can get rid ASAP. Every time I offer something I can guarantee the same three people will reply first - I've offered some rather strange, and sometimes very specific items (specific tooling for eg) and the same three people want them all each time . Sometimes they get the stuff sometimes sometimes I wait for someone different...

In the end, it's your stuff so do what you feel best, I don't think it is being patronising to give it to someone who you feel needs the item most

frogs · 02/02/2008 22:04

I do what Franny says, wait 24 hours to see how many responses I get, and then pick the one who sound most polite, sensible and genuinely in need of the item.

You get a feel quite quickly from the tone of the email as to how reliable the person is likely to be. IME the rudeness/demandingness of the email is directly correlated to the likeliness that you will be messed around, ie. people who can't be bothered to send you a polite email explaining why they would like an item are also the ones who won't bother to contact you when they change their minds about coming to pick it up.

BroccoliSpears · 02/02/2008 22:19

Sorry Turtle, you didn't come across like that really, and I'm sure you're wanting to choose the right person for the right reasons.

Triggles · 02/02/2008 22:20

There are a few people on our local freecycle that specifically state in their "offered" ads that any emails that are not polite will be deleted and not considered, as politeness doesn't cost them anything. I find that rather amusing.

Flibbertyjibbet · 02/02/2008 22:23

My friend put a wanted for cloth nappies on freecycle. She got an offer and agreed to it, when she went to collect the woman said she only put them on freecycle cos you can't put them on ebay anymore and asked for £40!!
I have never managed to get on to freecyle, got into trouble at my last job cos I wanted to register for it but it went through all this 'make Yahoo my home page' rubbish which I couldnt' get rid of and the IT dept were not impressed

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