My BF says I am.
I am looking for some advice, please.
I met a lovely man via online dating in April, I had no intentions of meeting him as I was just looking for some chat. I not long came out of a relationship and wasnt sure if I was ready. We then met end of May - he spoke to me everyday from April to May and took a real interest in my day and me. He always told me his last relationship ended in December and things moved pretty quickly in terms of her buying another place and her moving out (they owned his home together, he bought her out).
He has since asked me to do lots of activities - going to a lightshow, an annual street dance/party, a new years party (he is a member of this drinks company). He has also bought us gig tickets for a concert next year, and asked if I wanted to go to a 60s night early next year too. He has also told me that he never liked taking selfies with previous partners and he loves doing this with me. He said he feels proud when we are out together and he has never felt this way about anyone before. I then added him on fb, we werent social media friends as I rarely use it and deactivated my account until a few weeks ago. Then I saw lots of posts, and selfies with his ex when they were a couple. Most pictures were at all the events he has asked me to go to. I asked him about this, said it feels like he is recreating something and he said he is not, these are all things he likes doing and wants to share these experiences with me. He said if he wanted to recreate memories he wouldnt be with me as that would mean he wouldnt be over his ex. I then learned that although the relationship ended in December, she didnt move out til February this year, in the 7 months I have known him he has never shared this. I've queried this and he said I never asked, and why would he tell me that, as his relationship ended in December and she had to continute living in the house until the sorted finances out.
He tells me I am the one of him, and that he has never felt like this with anyone before. I do believe him but then I go away and think about all those photos and the life he had with his ex. He said he has never wanted to marry anyone, or have kids with anyone before, but he wants all of that with me. He says I am the one he has always wanted for but didnt realise it. I find that all hard to believe as he moved country with this ex (he lived down south and now lives in Scotland, where I live), and she fell pregnant but miscarried (he said it was a happy accident and it wasnt planned), he said they never discussed marriage and he didnt want that. I guess, what hurts is I recently found out that when he seperated from his wife (10 years ago), he dated someone immediately (he said she was rebound), tried to rekindle things with his wife (he was depressed at the time) and then started dating his now ex. He said he wasnt ready for a relationship and stopped dating her. It was then a year later they dated again... so surely she was "the one". He keeps telling me I am romancising his life and I am only making assumptions based on pictures.
How do I know this guy is genuine, I think he is, and when I am with him I feel safe, secure and so loved. He truly makes me happy and I do see a future with him. He is really good looking, I am so attracted to him and cant keep my hands off him. But I really do have deep feelings for him. I dont want to be his "next girl" though, like I am a replacement. He never told me any details about his rebound girl and dating his ex intially, I always thought his marriage ending was sad, I kind of feel differently now, knowing he was dating and doing his own thing.
He tells me I am being unreasonable. He said I am self-sabotaging our relationship because of things in the past. He said he loves me and if he didnt he wouldnt be here. He has asked what he can do to show/prove this to me, but I dont know if there is anything.
What would you do?!