He shouldn't be making me feel like this?

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I've been seeing this guy for a year. We started out dating and then slipped into FWB. I'm not sure if I want to keep it this way moving forward. I'm starting to not want him to be seeing anyone else and I didn't think he was but of course I don't know if he is and I've got my self into a position that I don't feel it is my place to ask him.

I've been thinking of giving it a little bit longer and then may be having a chat with him? But what do I say? I enjoy seeing him and I enjoy the sex but I know deep down I'm feeling undervalued. I know some people are happy with this set up but I'm not sure if I am. On the other hand I'm not ready for a full relationship.

Should I keep it how it is for the "benefits"?
Talk to him and if he can't put more in than just sex then stop seeing him?

I really like seeing him so I really don't know what to do, how to go about it.

You tell him pretty much exactly what you've written here.

That circumstances have led to it being a FWB situation but that's not what you were originally seeking. You like him and would like to pursue a relationship on grounds of it being a serious relationship.
If he would like that too then great, if he wouldn't then this set up is not for you and you wish him the very best and think it's best you go your separate ways.

It might be hard as you like him but ultimately it's not going to be the best choice for you as it's just going along with what he wants.

Apologies I misread that part about not ready for a full relationship.
In that case, this becomes less straight forward and I think I'd probably just knock it on the head if it's becoming an emotional entanglement.

You want him to be exclusive but you wouldn't want a relationship.
Why would he do this?
Is this out of STDs fear, dislike sharing your time and him not available as much for you, possessiveness or jealousy?

Hmmm. I think you need to decide what you want before you talk to him.

You say you don’t want a full relationship, that’s fine but you also want the sex with him but not FWB. What is it that you do want? I can’t see another option here.

How come you dont want a relationship? Just out of interest? You dont want to date him exclusively? Wahat do you want from him?

Thanks for your replies. I don't feel I have the time for a full relationship but deep down yes that is probably what I want. Ultimately I want him to put more effort in and so it is not solely just sex. I think I'm starting to feel a bit under valued. And yes I would like him to be exclusive to me.

I think all then reasons @TiAmoTiAmo

Them

I've gotten myself in a difficult situation, I know.

Just talk to him!! If you’re comfortable enough for him to put his penis in you, you should be comfortable enough to have an open conversation with him!

He's not making you feel anything, you are continuing to participating a FWB relationship which makes you feel undervalued. You have all the power here, you can stop seeing him at anytime and then you won't feel undervalued.

You want to feel better about the situation but don't think you can commit to a full relationship so you think making him change what he does is the way to fix it. It's not.

We cannot arrange other people in our life like pieces on chess board, sometimes the wants and needs of two people simply don't align. You have to decide if continuing a FWB arrangement might be more harmful to you in the long run.

If you feel you could make the time to develop the relationship then you need to talk to him about that.

I think your expectations are unfair and unrealistic but at the end of the day only he can say whether what you want with him is realistic and fair or not. He might be wiling to do this, small but possible chance so as everyone said, you have to talk to him.

I would start with being honest with yourself about what you want. There is no shame in wanting a relationship. There is nothing wrong with not being comfortable with being someones side peice after a year.

The discomfort you are feeling is because what you're accepting from him, and what you actually want are not the same thing.

I've got my self into a position that I don't feel it is my place to ask him.

Healthy, truly casual sex isn't that easy to pull off. You feel grim because you are opening your legs yet don't feel able to open your mouth to ask a question of him. Assert yourself with him, find out what you need to know. I feel that you fear you won't get the answer you are hoping for, in which case, you have answered your own question.

Find another FWB if that is what you really want, and spend some time how to protect your boundaries and build up your self esteem because no strings sex really needs that as a basis in order not to wreak havoc on you emotionally.

Thank you all. I think I just want him to put more effort in even if we don't go into full relationship.

Can anyone tell me what @Farradaymange said? I know it can't be repeated word for word.

I think if you're looking for "more" it's because you want more than he is willing to give. Find it elsewhere with a fresh start. There are millions of men out there who won't make you feel like an option.

Thank you. I will speak to him, if nothing changes then It's probably best to move on.

But why would he put in more effort if you can’t even tell him exactly what you want?

First you need to decide if you do want a relationship with him or not (no shame in it, it sounds to me like you do or you wouldn’t be feeling this way)

Then you need to decide whether to a) continue as you are, feeling undervalued, or b) speak to him - and also what to do if you get an answer you don’t want.

If he’s happy with the status quo I think you have to end it. You’ll only feel worse continuing the arrangements but knowing he’s not wanting more.

As for what to say, I’d just tell him it’s not working for you anymore and that you’ve decided you don’t like feeling like the side piece anymore.