How many Christmassy things do you do?

[Forleasenavidad]

Lay in bed feeling so tired as we’ve all been ill recently, not covid but that other awful one that felt like covid.
I’m very into Christmas and usually do a *Lot with Dd, 4, think all the baking, activities, days out etc. This year, she’s seen a Santa (wasn’t keen) made a gingerbread house and we’ve done the tree. There are so many things left to do, see the lights, fake snow, ice skating, meet up with friends tomorrow…but I’m just so tired 😬can I knock some on the head? How much do you do?

Usually one thing per weekend. So this weekend we're going to see Santa, next we're going to see a Festival of Lights. Few other things like the Christmas market in town and a local elf trail but nothing too over the top.

I remember over committing to Christmas stuff when my DC were small and then being knackered all through December. Sort of defeats the point of having a lovely time!

With hindsight, they don’t really need a catalogue of amazing Christmas experiences at that age. Little things like a hot chocolate and a Christmas film at home can be just as much fun.

If you’ve been ill, cut yourself some slack. You want to be rested and well for the Christmas break.

@Detectorists That’s the thing, there’s only really this weekend and next left, I usually love it so much..just need energy!

You don’t need permission from randoms on the internet.

I realised before I was a parent that kids don't remember half then crap parents run themselves ragged to do with them.
Mostly thanks to my mum tbh, she'd bring up days and activities we'd done, presents she'd gone to lengths to get, was all a blank for me.

So I tempered my parenting with that knowledge and we do maybe 2 or 3 special treat like things that take planning. Now DD is 9, she barely remembers the expensive trips like Santa's cabin and Making christmas.teddies and decorations and sitting with Santa and having a sleigh ride etc. What does she remember? The xmas.eve we watched Muppets Christmas Carol and I emptied 6 bags of crisps into a big bowl and we had hot chocolate with squirty cream and marshmallows.

Making memories with kids... Ultimately, your spending energy and cash on things to be forgotten. 🤪

My.point? Cut yourself some slack. Talk to your kids and ask what they want to do really, you may find they'd rather play Roblox / Minecraft and watch Disney films than all the Activities and running about anyway.

When my dc were toddlers and preschoolers it was easy to substitute their usual activities for Christmas versions of those things - eg making Christmas cards instead of random painting, but once school started there just wasn’t as much time.

Everything takes so much longer in December - there are more people on the road, in the car park, in the shopping centre, so just getting groceries can take nearly double the usual time.

We are very, very selective about what we leave the house for in December. We have to attend the dc’s nativity plays and the school Christmas fairs. Dh and I pick one event to attend by ourselves - usually carols or similar and we visit a local Santa. We detour round our city to see Christmas lights on our way home from visiting grandpa. Dd loves ice skating so we drop another after school activity to fit that in.

In all honesty that much stretches me to my limits.

Our house is cosy and relaxing. We have a couple of Christmas movie nights, and I have a box of Christmas themed books stored with the decorations. We have some Christmas cereal bowls that make an appearance every December - silly little things but low effort for everyone. I leaned in to these simple things after a couple of Decembers battling bugs and colds.

We do stuff every weekend from mid November then every day from when they finish school up until Christmas eve and a few evening things too. I am aware this is a lot but it’s just what we like to do in our family, so do what you want to do and don’t compare with others. Social media has a lot to answer for that’s why I don’t use it!

@Coasterfan What do you do?

I’m feeling rubbish too and I’m looking at social media photo which isn’t helpful. But then I remember my 6 year old’s favourite thing about last Christmas was the night we had dinner and bath early and then stayed up late for a Christmas film and “midnight snacks”.

Mine are 9 & 6 now. We've had years (pre covid) when we did it all. The youngest was too young and eldest just about remembers but as other have said its the little things. During covid we went into town, bought hotchocolates and walked around looking at the lights- that's what they've asked to do again! We've seen santa this year and got a lights trail booked for next weekend and we did some Christmas crafts last weekend with Christmas music on after putting up the tree. We will probably do Christmas baking. I think we're done! At 4 I wouldn't do too much outside its forgotten!

@Forleasenavidad you will probably laugh when I tell you my two are actually 13 and 15! So we don’t do Santa any more but so far we have done a couple of cinema trips, an aquarium, Cadbury world, a zoo and Alton towers Christmas. This weekend we are going to our local Christmas market and ice skating today and tomorrow Warwick castle, next weekend visiting my mum and doing a national trust place and a big open air museum. In the evenings we have done a couple of light trails and are doing the panto next week.

When they finish school we are doing sealife and Lego discovery at Birmingham, Alton towers again, legoland and stockeld park in Yorkshire then Christmas Eve at the Yorkshire wildlife park.

We have merlin passes so a lot is free and we spend more of our Xmas budget on doing things than presents.

When they were little we did more traditional Christmassy things. Santa visits etc but we have adapted it as they have grown.

My kids are grown up now but take dgc. Go to farm to play arm then paint Xmas baubles. They get fired in kiln and collect following week. They are beautiful and such fun to do.

Ice skating and hot chocolate with marshmallows and cream.

Xmas lights trail around village with dgc and dogs. I make a list like stocking, star, Xmas tree etc and as they find the item lit up they tick it off. Then go home for hotdogs and hot chocolate.

Xmas movie night with popcorn making and popcorn threading.

Early in December I dig out last year's Xmas cards and give pinking scissors and a hole punch to dgc. They make gift cards for their gifts from old Xmas cards. Then put silver thread through hole to complete. I have a silver pen for writing them out too.

We make Xmas cupcakes/cookies and dgc decorate them and take them home to eat in a tin. I play Xmas music on background whilst they do it.

Sometimes my dd or sil come and we go together but sometimes I just do it with dgc to give parents a rest and my dd has done bits of gift buying for them whilst they are at my house Xmas baking. SIL is left wrapping up gifts.

Parents always take them to see Santa, attend school nativity and carol service but I go too if I'm given ticket.

Earlier in the year I collected a few fir cones with dgc. One evening when they are at my house for their dinner I will bring them out and they can spray them silver or gold and tie a thread on to hang onto their Xmas tree. I also spray some foliage from garden and make a display with Holly. I always make one for DD too in a basket. Dgc sometimes help me.

DD and dgc help me to decorate my tree.

My favourite memories are getting cosy, the ubiquitous mumsent hot chocolate. Playing board games and creating thing's.

Omg. I'm feeling useless. We do Santa and this year we're going to see a live crib. Normally we just do Santa ...

My DC are adults now, but they always enjoyed dressing up and taking part in the Nativity performance by their Sunday school during one of the Advent services each year at church.
When they were a little older - about 8 - I took them to the Watchnight service at midnight on Christmas Eve, which was always magical.
I did stockings separately from the Christmas tree presents, even years after they knew Santa was simply a story about St Nicholas, bishop of Smyrna. And of course we always had a special dinner with roast turkey.
One year we were in Tenerife for Epiphany and they loved seeing the three wise men parading through town on their camels, scattering sweets to the crowds, followed by Roman soldiers, angels, etc, culminating in a firework display in the town square, where the holy family were on display in a mock up of the Bethlehem stable.
Christmas is such a lovely joyful celebration of God’s gift to the world, isn’t it. Or at least it is when it isn’t smothered in commercialised tinsel and tat!

We go to church on Christmas Day as well of course

Fuck all.

DS is ND and doesn't "do" Christmas

Sometimes you do though. OP, and everyone who needs to hear this, you've done enough, everyone is happy, there's nothing else you need to do.

Nothing really, we go for a walk xmas eve and sometimes watch a xmas movie but that's about it.

We both work crazy hours, DH in emergency services and currently working 6-7 days weeks with 14 hour days so literally just dont have the time.

I do feel guilty, but the kids always seem happy and love the walk we do.

This is a wind up, surely.

Nothing. Took them to Santa when they were little. Took them to winter wonderland in London which was poor. Tried to book ice skating, cancelled in covid.

We tend to do at least one festive thing every sat and sun in December leading up to Xmas.

plus the odd thing in the week such as local panto etc.

so far we have done winter wonderland, national trust light trail and Christmas fair, decorated the tree, a few Christmas films with hot chocolates etc. wrapped gifts for her class and school staff.

we still have to come - santas grotto visit, panto this Wednesday, ice skating with my mum, we also still need to do our Harrods trip (yearly tradition, go and see all the windows, get large slices of their chocolate cake each and pig out!)

"Doing all these (often expensive) Christmassy things" wasn't really a thing when I was a child (I'm 64). But despite this, my abiding memories are of: decorating the tree with Mum every year, helping to wrap the presents for other people and one stonking year when I went with Dad to the farm to collect the turkey. My older brother seethed with envy about that for years. He probably still does.

As others have indicated, children do not need you to kill yourself taking them to do stuff every waking moment - it's being with you, being cosy and one-off 'different' things that stay in our memories.

I'm pretty sure that this pressure to 'do stuff' is quite modern.

This year we:

Went for a long winter walk in a nature reserve with soup etc.
Went to Christmas at Kew (light installations).
Will go to a carol service on 20th.
Have family events 22nd, 24th, 25th and 29th.
Garden Centre visit.

Plus the usual: school nativity play, carol service, ballet recital, drama club performance.

We also have the box of Christmas books, and refocus normal crafting activities around Christmas themes. Ditto films and TV.

She has a fancy advent calendar that we fill, but we don't do elf on the shelf or Christmas eve boxes.

We used to do a Santa's Grotto when they were small, but at 11 & 13 they're a bit old now, so we do a lights trail instead now which is tonight. (DH & DS not impressed it clashes with the football)! We've always done the panto (next weekend) although I suspect DS won't be impressed this year so might be the last one for a bit. I'm hoping they will come with me to watch Avatar 2 at some point over the holidays and we might fit some ice skating in. DS is a bit meh about doing stuff with us now though, he'd rather be with his mates, although he'll be good over Christmas itself when we're going to stay with the in laws.