How to recover from bullying

[Whateillido]

I don’t want to go into details as very outing. I was badly bullied by someone a few years ago. I still have to see the person unfortunately and there is no way that I can’t. I’m not bullied by them anymore but we we mutually know people and there is no way of getting around that. How can I just move on and stop feeling upset every time I see them. How have you recovered from bullying yourself and what methods have you used. I feel like I’m ruining my life being upset about how everything happened. How can I just move on?

This is something I’m going through myself. I was in a WhatsApp chat and it got bitchy. I decided to leave, I couldn’t be doing with all the notifications and voice messages constantly. Literally as soon as I left, they started to create drama. Accused me of lying about something, when I’d went to someone I thought I could trust in that group and she blabbed to the rest of them. Even though they know she’s lying, cause she’s more “popular” they basically covered for her. She literally admitted the thing she done, and then backtracked to make me out the liar. Then started gaslighting, I’m the crazy one, knowing she has her little group of witches to back her up. I just can’t believe the lies. Lies that were added on. Just because I left a stupid group. Anyway, they live in the same area. This is not something you can shake off. The one who I thought I could trust totally backstabbed. I don’t know myself how I can move on because to be honest I’d like revenge. Hopefully they’ll get karma. Don’t trust anyone.

No idea.
I was bullied by a manager for around 2 years. I left the job 9 years ago but it has affected me so deeply it has shattered my confidence and caused horrific anxiety. I don’t even live near them and, these days, hardly go out so unlikely to ever see them again.
I dreamt about them last week and I woke in a cold sweat of terror. I wish I could move past it all. I don’t think about them day to day or anything but the effects just won’t leave me.

Have you had any counselling? You can self refer on the NHS for talking therapies in some areas.
www.nhs.uk/mental-health/talking-therapies-medicine-treatments/talking-therapies-and-counselling/nhs-talking-therapies/

They don’t realise the lasting harm they cause. I know it’s hard but they’re really not worth thinking about. They thrive on upsetting and attacking you. Don’t let them win. They’re just people. One day it won’t matter.

You're probably experiencing a trauma reaction every time you have to see them. Your brain literally can't help reacting the way it does as it involves the fight, fright, freeze centres which are more primal than the higher centres. This means that you can't rationalise your way out of your reactions. You need proper therapy to deal with this issue.

Why do you have to see them? If it's a relative you can dump them, even a parent.