AIBU about my DH's possible Tourettes

[FestiveFiend]

DH has always mumbled go himself.

Over the last couple of years he has started to shout things out. It's always the same two or three phrases. He's an anxious person. Goes over stuff a lot in his head.

He saw a therapist who said it was OCD? He doesn't do it in public. He only does it at home when he starts to think about stuff. THe therapist said it was like an itch he has to scratch and it was OCD. Seems like Tourettes to me though.

He does it usually going over bad stuff from the past or horrible moments in his head. And he just shouts it out. Maybe 2 or 3 times an evening.

We have 2 DC who are babies and they are too young to really know anything. And it's quite often after they go to bed.

DH doesn't want to do anything about it. He says the therapist wanted to talk about his past and he doesn't want to go there

I'm pushing him to get CBT. He really wants me to leave it alone

I think it will become quite disconcerting for the kids in the future. AIBU to keep pushing him to seek help? Am I being unsupportive and should just respect his wishes to be left alone?

If he is shouting that he hates himself, the tic isnt the problem.
Unfortunately for survivors of some kinds of severe abuse, having children can be a trigger and dredge up memories that are hard to deal with.
What your DH is dealing with sounds too serious for CBT; I suggest you ask him to see his GP and ask for EMDR therapy. Its available on the NHS in most areas.

If he won't do it, you need to decide if you and your children can live like this, because its not something thats going to fix itself.

If he is shouting that he hates himself, the tic isnt the problem.

Yes, I agree. It sounds like a functional tic related to his trauma, OCD and anxiety rather than Tourette’s.

You can’t treat the tics, he needs to address the underlying causes, but he also needs to be ready and in a good place to be able to open that huge box.

I don’t know if it helps you, but with regards to the children hearing him, my DD has coprolalia (the swearing/inappropriate tics), and she tics some awful things sometimes - with family/friends children, once it’s explained that DD has something called Tourette’s which makes her say and do things she doesn’t mean and to ignore it, they’ve all been very accepting and take very little notice.

I hope he can get some help.