Exaggerated language

[doris9034]

On the back of reading a few recent threads, I've noticed how much exaggerated language there seems to be
EG - (in relation to sickness bug going round) "I've pulled my children out of nursery" vs "I decided not to send them in for a few days"; or (in relation to minor incident) "I was crying and shaking" - vs "I got upset".
AIBU to think there isn't really such a need to exaggerate everything to get a point across?

They aren’t good examples of exaggeration. I’ve seen people at work crying and shaking with anger and distress. It does happen.
‘Pulling out’ versus ‘not sending in’ are equally accurate. I suppose people need to be clear it’s temporary however they describe it, but I think that would probably be the default assumption in most cases.

Oh I agree. It's the hyperbolic pseudo disgust and outrage that makes me roll my eyes. Useful to see who can be taken seriously or not though. Anyone flailing about calling names and pretending to be in shock at a slight disagreement can just be discounted and their posts skimmed over on future. It's so coercive. Reminds me of my ex H who used to pretend I had done something utterly beyond the pale for normal day to day decisions I made that he didn't like. It's how abusers behave - pretending you're absolutely disgusting for normal opinions and behaviour. Those who do it really don't seem to notice though. I listen to a podcast sometimes where he draws parallels between personality disordered behaviour and what seems to be acceptable behaviour towards others on social media. The similarities are worrying. It's as though what was once accepted as disordered communication has become mainstream and acceptable.

No one must ever be mildly annoyed or q bit amused, you must either cry and shake, or spit your tea out laughing. I think it's a Mumsnet thing .

There are an awful lot of ‘terrified’ people on mm, op.

The words “vile” and “disgusting” are liberally used on these boards.

Someone yesterday managed to apply the word “vile” to a largely constructive discussion about how to avoid financial abuse of women.

Sometimes less is more…

People on here often seem to be ‘baffled’ or ‘bewildered’ by things that ultimately just boil down to individual differences and are easy to
understand.

When celeb culture really took off (late 90s?) you had everyone “devastated” by the smallest thing. So to me it’s been around a while.
We communicate so much in writing now. I can’t imagine people would use such exaggerations in verbal speech. They’d look silly

I think ‘baffled’ is more euphemism than exaggeration. It usually means ‘I don’t understand how you can say or believe something so obviously untrue’

As long as nobody over exaggerates, I don't mind

Well, as long as they don’t massively over exaggerate, it’s ok.

I wonder if it happens more in written communication as you can't convey emphasis with tone or body language in written form - so people select more exaggerated language to compensate for that. Possibly.

Oh yes I agree!

I also find “pulled my children out” a bit dramatic, in place of “decided to keep them at home for a bit”, and thought that when I read it earlier today. However, I’m prepared to be told it’s a regional difference or something and that I’m being U! It’s the picture it paints of a frantic mum yanking her kids out of the setting, rather than just keeping them home for a bit.

Generally I hate any OTT language, especially if it relates to hungry or thirst, food or drink. So talk fo been “staaaarving” when you’re a bit hungry or once someone said to me they’d had “a raging thirst” which really set my teeth on edge.

Oh my God, I know EXACTLY what you mean. I must have seen this a million times over the past week. It perplexes, confuses and completely blindsides me. If it drags on any longer, I shall literally have a fit and be bluelighted to hospital. My DH would be sobbing and shaking with utter devastation at the prospect of being alone and terrified. How grim.

Yes! Seems to be more and more common recently, not just on mumsnet but in general. Like everyone is turning in to attention seeking teenagers. The one that annoys me the most is how much people throw the word 'abuse' round now. 'My husband emotionally abuses me' 'oh that's awful, how?' 'he sometimes calls me immature when I slam doors during arguments' 🙄 don't know why people are so desperate to be victims now.

The number of people on MN who have "anxiety" when they are mildly worried about something completely normal to be nervous about is quite amazing. It's all part of an increasingly self-centred society in my opinion.

I don't really know many adult people in real life who resort to bursting into tears when they don't like something. I have also never in my life seen a grown adult throw themselves to the floor when they don't get their own way. Almost all MN MILs seem to be prone to this.

When I first joined MN I was a bit bemused by all the "screaming" that goes on.

Screaming to me is what happens in the shower in Psycho - turns out on MN it is anyone who slightly raises their voice.

All of the "calling out" that goes on always gives me a wry smile as I imagine someone in lederhosen on top of a mountain.

I agree that the 'pulling out' one isn't a good example. It's figurative language, but it doesn't necessarily imply anything remotely dramatic.

You're right that some people are very OTT about things though - the retchers, the shakers and the constantly mortified. It's nothing that's specific to MN or to social media and forums though imo. Plenty of people are like that in real life!

People do love the hyperbole on Mumsnet. A recent thread had someone claiming to have only seen one cyclist stop at a red light so far this year

Haven't you ever sat an English exam? Much better marks awarded for descriptive and colourful language that evokes feelings in the reader. The types of posters you describe would do brilliantly in the 11+!

I don't think social media has helped. Plenty of FB and Instagram posts about "I'm obsessed with this kitchen/colour/dress" , as opposed to liking it. Or an emotional story shared online and the response is "I'm crying!" ..I doubt you're sobbing into your phone. It's all clickbaity language which has infringed everyday language.

Surely not if they say they are 'terrified' in a situation where being mildly worried is a proportionate response.

I read about a lot of foods that were 'incredible' or phenomenol and actively sought them out thinking I was setting myself up for culinary nirvana, or to be underwhelmed because what they really meant was that the thing was 'quite nice'.

There are also a lot of people claiming to be "traumatised" when faced with a mildly upsetting situation.

It's exacerbated by misuse of the word 'literally'. "I was literally starving". "I was literally blown away". No, you were not.

It's like that word "slammed". Once used by tabloids as an alternative word to "criticised", now they're all at it. No one is ever merely criticised, according to the media - they are always SLAMMED.

Even when people on Twitter discuss an aspect of a BBC drama they're slightly unhappy with, it's reported as "TWITTER USERS SLAM BBC" etc etc etc.

I also guiltily think to myself when someone describes their perfectly average offspring's perfectly average achievement as "amazing" or "incredible", "What's so amazing about him/her?"

Yeah I know everyone is proud of their kids. My mum never described me as amazing 😁